Fifteen

Aisha had never thought she would cry this hard until she felt her lung threatening to suffocate her whole body. She had never imagined she would miss Mama until she found herself slowly walking towards the car, and that’s when she knew she couldn’t do it anymore. Mama mattered more to her than this change of environment she was having all in the name of school. She cried almost all their way to Katsina, and Nasir had consoled her until he couldn’t anymore.

She had her face sulked and glum until they drove into Rafin dadi, the area Firdausi lived. Nasir turned to look at her with a small smile on his lips. “Aisha, for Allah’s sake, the crying is way too much. You aren’t getting married to someone you hate. It’s just school.”

She turned to look at him, and poutedher lips. “You don’t know how I feel, Dr.” For the first time since they left Buachi, she had finally spoken, and it gladdened Nasir. He had been trying to make a decent conversation with her, but whenver he forced a word out of her mouth, it came out together with tears.

“I’m sorry, but you should stop crying, Aisha. I can’t drive you into Nna’s house while you’re crying like this. She will feel bad about it.”

Aishe turned to look at him with a look that spoke her annoyance. he laughed at the school and looked at her with eys that were meant to charm, softnes, exquisiteness and masculinity; Aisha nearly shuddered. “But, Aisha, I thought you were going to miss only me. How did that changed?”

This time, Aisha let out a groan. Nasir had never annoyed her as he did today. She watched as they drove to the house, and hetr heart poundered as though she were a girl that was taken to a boarding school by her family. “Do I really have to live here, Dr?” she asked innocently, her eyelashes were still misty with her tears. Eventhough teh situation she was in ha saddened Nasir, he couldn’t help but admired how she looked.

He looked at her intensely until she got tired of his burning eyes on her face and looked away. “Can you take me back to Mama? I really need to see her for one last time.” This time, Nasir laughed with a loud timbre that forced a shrill out of Aisha’s lips.

“Are you sure of what you’re saying? We just arrived from the six hours journey we had. We didn’t even entered the houde and you’re talking about going back?” He raised his hands in surrender at the look she sent his way. “Only if you can drive us back,” he added, and she nodded her head.

Chuckling a little, Nasir honked at the gateman in Firdausi’s house and the gate was wide open. He greeted them and Nasir answered back before he drove into the drive way and parked.Turning to look at her, Nasir smiled, “We’re here, Aisha. But please will you promise not to cry in front of Nana? She’ll feeel bad about asking you to come here.”

She nodded her head at him, and he smiled at her. They hopped out of the car together and Nasir pulled out her trolley from the trunk. Just in time, Firdausi walked out of the house with Sudais carefully cradled into he arms. “Nasiruuu!” She squealed and hugged him, when Aisha took a smiling Sudais in her hands.

Nasir groaned and broke their, he hated it when Nana called him Nasiru, just like thier grandfather did. “Aishaaa!” She squealed and hugged Aisha, as Nasir collected Sudais from her hands.

“Let’s get inside, it’s hot. Katsina has the hottest sun in Nigeria I thinnk.” They trailed behind her as they entered the living room and foounf Khalid just coming out of his room.

They exchanged pleasantries with Nasir and Aisha greeted him. “How was your trip, Aisha?” He asked, his eyes fixed on her face that was was slightly red from all her tears.

Nasir chirped in before Aisha could talk. “She had been crying all the way from Bauchi down to Katsina. It was so hard passing all those police outposts with a crying teenager seated beside me. You need to see the looks they were giving me, Khalid.”

They laughed, and Aisha ducked her head down in shame. She knew it so well that Nasir was going to tease her about ths years they would live together, if not for eternity. Firdausi guided her to the room she slept in only weeks ago, she helped her with her trolley inside. Before Aisha followed her in, she turned to look at Nasir, whom was walking out to the mosque. He sensed her eyes on him and turned, their eyes met and Nasir smiled genuinely at her. This time, there was no teasing in his eyes. “I’m not going to run away, Aisha. I’ll be back, I’ll just be there to pray.” She nodded and faintly smiled at him before he walked out.

“Bathe and pray, Aiah. You should feel at home pleae. We wil be at the dinning table.” Aisha nodded and proceeded to the bathroom. She had her bathe and changed into a long comfy gown before she prayed and slowly walked ot the living room. As Firdausi said, she found them waiting for her at the living room. She ducked her head down and sat down. Silently, with only Nasir and Firdausi sharing some words, they ate their lunch and moved to the living room.

She looked at Nasir and pouted her lips. “I want to call Mama please, can I call her with your phone?”

He nodded her head at her and handed her his phone. He wanted nothing but for Nana and Khalid to give them sometime with Aisha. He could see she was sad and wanted someone to talk to. She knew his password, there was no point asking. She unlocked the phone and dialed Mama’s number, it was already on the dail pad, because he found himself in the situation where he had to call Mama for Aisha, when she didn’t want to stop her tears. It was after she had the phonecall with Mama that she stopped crying.

“Hello, Mama,” Aishe said, when Mama’s voiced boomed through the speaker. She felt her eys getting misty and she wanted nothing but to be embraced with Mama. She had thought about Mommy today, when they got to the roundabout that would lead to their area, and she though; how would Mommy feel if she were to know about her life now? Aisha felt as pain glided through her soul, she knew Mommy might have ven sold out their house and had gone back living in hotels. May be she was even the one holding her back from all she wanted to do.

“Aishatah, how are you? You’ve stopped crying, right?” Aisha nodded her head as if Mama could see her. She found her tears back, seeing the look Nasir was flashing her, it was full of plea.

“Yes, Mama. How have you been? You ate lunch already, right?” Admiringly, Nasir watched as Aisha lovingly conversed with his mother as though she were hermother. He loved the kind of reatonship Aisha and Mama shared. It was the best of its kind. And he would forever bless the day Aisha was brought ot the hospital he worked.

They finished talking before Aisha handed him back his phone and took in a deep breath. Firdausi stood up and went to her room with Sudais in her hands, whom had slept off already.

“What happened, Aisha? You want to cry, right? Should I take you somewhere else to cry it out?” His voice was as low as a whisper, and she glanced at him from where she sat. He had his hands on his laps while he scrutinized the look on her, and through his eyes, she found bliss.

“You promised to take me somewhere, is that somewhere fun to be in and would it be able to feel like home?” She asked, her eyes unwavering on his face.

Softy, Nasir smiled at home an nodded his fun. “The place is so much fun to be, and you have me, I’ll provide to you the ambiance of home that you missed.”

’Then we should go after we prayed asr, is it fine? I need to take a nap before it’s time. Though it’s barely 30 minutes to 4pm.” He nodded head head in approval as she walked towards her room. He knew it was her own way of escaping from him to cry her eyes out, and she did.

The moment she want to her room and have it locked, Aisha slopped on her ground and broke into tears. She wanted nothing but her Mommy, at the same time, she despised nothing more than she despided her Mommy. Asiya Bukar, she had now wished to refer to her, eventhough she hated the kind of pain that accompanied that thought. That was the reason she said no whenever Nasir asked her wether she wanted a phone, it was always a no. Because she knew the moment she got a phone of her own, that very day she would contact Mommy. But she’s better off without her.

❃

They had been out for almost an hour but Aisha had barely spoke a decent sentence to him. That got to Nasir and he parked his way on their way back home. He looked at her and she turned as well, having their eyes merged together and Aisha looked away. “Stop giving me that look, Dr.”

“I have to give you that look because you look nothing like the Aisha I had a chat with, yesteday. What turned you into this? This isn’t because you’re missing Mama. Aisha, you can always talk to me, you know?” His voice was soft and calming, Aisha wanted to hide herself in his chest, and feel the reverberations coming from his chest as he spoke.”

She looked at him, and this time, a smile slowly graced her lips. “I’m really thankful to you, but Dr, I’m missing my mother. It kills me knowimg there is absolutely no place I’ll go to finf her. I’m really curious about how she would feel if she knew about this. About you, your family and me coming to Katsina to study.”

She laughed at the pitiful look she saw on his face. “Do you know what Mommy would have said about you if she were to know?”

He shook his head, amused at the happy look coalesced with a sad one on her face. She really looked happ y talking about her mother but the same time, the conversation was tearing her heart. She smiled graciously before she continued. “She would be like, ‘Humaira, I’m really afraid of this Dr you talk about. I don’t trust guys with you, Humaira. Please take care of yourself, don’t invest too much of your soul in him.”

He laughed, he knew about Mommy’s phobia with men around Aisha. And he felt sad that despite how she was taking care and being protective of Aisha, she still lost what Mommy wished to marry her off with. “Did Mommy for once thought of marrying you off, Aisha? I can see she’s always talking to you about how you shouldn’t mingle with guys and not even trust me.”

Thia made Aisha laughed, because she too knew how Mommy had contradicted herself when it came to this. “You won’t believe that everyday she eats my cooking she always said ‘Humaira, I really pray you get a husband that is appreciative and loves your cooking. Your hands are blessed, Masha Allah.’”

“I’m glad that she knows. So, are we good now or you need a walk down the street? We can park here and walk for some miles before we come back. Walking when you’re sad with the person you adore helps you ease off the sadness.” There was a mischievious glint in his eyes and looked at her face closely to see her reaction.

“But I’ve never said I adored you, Dr. Yes, I’d love to have a walk.”

He laughed too, as they got down the car and walked side by side. The soft evening wind blew onto her face and had some parts of her veil off of her hair, revealing her black hair. Nasir turned slightly and looked at the way she was looking at the people going on with their daily activities as if she didn’t mind being one of them. There was a smile smile as they reached down the road. “Can we cross the street over to those beggars? I need to give them some money.”

He smiled and nodded his head while they started looking sideways for coming vehicles. “You have to save your money, you know? You can’t be young and broke in this life.”

“Are we back at the age matter again, Dr?” She looked at him through her peripheral view, and groaned.

Nasir laughed before he continued. “You didn’t let me finish, Aisha. Young and beautiful, that’s what I wanted to say.”

They succesfully crossed the street and Aisha turned to look at him. “ Have I ever told you that I hate men?”

He watched as she disgustingly looked at a man that was passing by, he had a cigarette squeezed between his fingers while he blowed out the smoke from his gray and probably dirty mouth. Nasir smiled softly at her, “I know you hate men, but not your Sr, right?”

With pouted lips, she looked at him and shook her head. “I hate men within the range of 23-55 years. Whoever falls on it, I’m sorry.”

He looked pained and she laughed at him. Clutching onto his chest dramatically, Nasir followed behind her as she gave the women and their children what she intended and turned to look at him, a small smile playing on her lips. “What? You look like a pregnant woman that wants to puke.”

“You practically said you hate me, Aisha. Baba will be 55 next month, do you hate him too?”

Slowly, she shook her head with a smile, “He’s my father, have you ever seen a daughter that hates her dad? It’s a no, so I love Baba even though he’s 54.”

“That makes me your brother then, and I’m just 24, one year into your range. These excuses are enough for you to fill me out, right?”

Adamantly, Aisha shook her head while they crossed the road back and were alreasy walking to heir car. Surprisingly, she had felt light. That heaviness in her chest had been slipping down to her feet as she walked on it. She can never aprreciate Nasirnin her as much as he deserved to be appreciated. “You have a whole year experience. And no, eventhough I had nosibling, I know brothers can be annoying. Just live with the fact, Dr.”

He groaned dramatically and Aisha laughed. They entered the car and Nasir turned to look at her before he ignited the car to life. “I’ll fin my way back to Katsina before it’s even too late for me. Motivational speakers said staying in a place you aren’t appreciated can cause more harm than good.”

It was already dark, and from different angel of the city there was sounds of the adhzans, mosques proclaiming the maghrib salah. “I don’t think there is someone I appreciate his or her being in my life apart from you, Dr. You’re appreciated and adored.” And then it came, the Billion Dollar smile that swept Nasir off his feet, and he knew it, there was no going back today. He loved Aisha.