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Chapter 4: I'm Not Quite Sure

The following day after work, I went back home and changed into causal clothes before going to my sister’s apartment. I touched the mace that I always keep in my purse, reassured by its presence.

I knocked on the door, and she answered it after a couple minutes. A look of relief shone on Lola’s face as she let me inside. Immediately, Lola closed the door and latched it shut tightly.

I noticed that she seemed kind of on edge, and her hair wasn’t even brushed well. No makeup was on her face, which was unusual too. Her blonde hair didn’t look as shiny as it normally did either.

Lola’s apartment seemed to have gone downhill from the last time I saw it. Her place was normally clean and organized. I saw a pile of clothes on her living room floor, and dishes were piled in her sink. Then there were old food wrappers scattered all over.

She must’ve been stressed out from what she was going through. I wondered how long she actually kept her troubles from me. I felt so bad that she had to be in such a situation.

I pushed those thoughts away, as I remembered the good news I had for her.

“Hey I’ve got great news.”

Lola’s face lit up as she said, “Really? I’m happy for you.”

I shook my head and told her, “No it’s for you. I’m going to be a surrogate and am getting paid one million dollars. Lola, I’m helping pay off your debt.”

Lola got teary eyed and asked, “Do you really mean it?”

“Yes I do. I want to get you out of your trouble.”

“Thank you so much.” Lola hugged me tightly and said, “I’m so grateful to you. I love you Danica.”

I hugged her back and said, “I’m glad to help you out. I love you too, Lola.”

Lola almost teared up again but instead asked, “Would you like to stay for dinner?” She added, “It’s okay if you can’t.”

“Sure, I’d love that. We haven’t done that for a while. I miss it.”

“I do too.”

Truthfully, I couldn’t remember the last time we had eaten together. Both of us had jobs and weren’t always on flexible schedules. I had a sudden guilty feeling come over me.

I should try and see my sister more often. She deserved to have someone see her during such a difficult time. Though, I would still visit her after this mess was all over.

She went to get two bowls out and scooped out ramen for both of us.

I saw her take my bowl and set it on the table first. I helped myself to a can of generic soda in her fridge before sitting at her small wooden dining table.

Suddenly, I started thinking more and more about being a surrogate. I was beginning to become nervous about it. What if I couldn’t handle being pregnant? It wasn’t easy, as mom used to tell me stories of her being pregnant with me.

Maybe I should’ve thought this over more. There was so much to worry about with pregnancy. I didn’t think I could handle it after all. It wasn’t too late to back out.

When my sister came back, I tried to act like nothing was wrong. I didn’t want her to know I had to back out. She would be absolutely heartbroken.

After I finished eating, I said, “Thanks for the meal, but I’ve got to go. I’ll text you soon to check on you.”

“I’m looking forward to it.”

I waved goodbye to Lola and went down the staircase and out the building. I left her apartment and headed back to my car. As usual, I scanned the area to make sure nobody was following me.

After I had been followed one time, I started to be more wary of my surroundings. I wasn’t going to lead a potential creep home.

I even made a quick circulation around my car to make sure no had tried to break in and steal anything. A lot of theft took place in the areas where we resided.

Sometimes I wished both of us lived in safer neighborhoods and didn’t have to be so cautious. I was sure someone like Dax never had to deal with issues like mine. It was an extra burden to my sister and me.

Immediately, I headed for Ryan Inc. I hoped there wasn’t a lot of traffic on the way, as it was important to get there quickly. Luckily, it was after rush hour and didn’t seem as bad.

When I arrived, there were still employees there. All of them were working hard and didn’t even look up at me.

But it was only seven at night. I was sure Dax would be there, as he seemed like a late-night worker. Hopefully he was there or I’d gone for nothing. I didn’t want to waste gas coming over here again.

I walked in the building and went towards his office. The agreement had his work number and office listed on the bottom.

It was luck that a receptionist saw me not long after I got in. She led me to Dax’s office, guiding me to the elevator that would take me to his top floor suite. I became more and more nervous about the impending conversation as we waited.

He had a right to know that I didn’t want to do this anymore. I was sorry to back out but had to. I wouldn’t be able to carry through doing this kind of thing.

Maybe someone else would show up that he’d want. I think if I told people who this was for, many more women would be up for it and the money was almost too good to refuse.

As I stepped into his office, I noticed that it had no personal touch to it. He had no photos of family or friends on his desk, and didn’t have any decorations on it. Even the room was in the drabbest shade of gray.

Dax wore a suit with a pinstriped tie and expensive leather dress shoes. I hadn’t even bothered to look better for my last meeting with him. I had to get out of this position before it was too late.

He cleared his throat and asked, “What brings you here Miss Winters?”

Again with this Miss Winters. It made me feel like I worked for his company.

I confidently said, “I’m sorry but I can’t be your surrogate. I don’t think this is the position for me. I hope this doesn’t inconvenience you Dax.”

Dax actually frowned a little which surprised me. He had never shown much emotion around me. Why was he disappointed?

“It has to be you,” Dax said with a hint of desperation in his voice.

Wow, he sure wanted me for this position. I was sort of flattered.

“Why does it have to be me? I’m not anyone special,” I told him.

I wondered what made him choose me. I knew there many other women who were more than qualified to be in the position that was offered. There may have been younger women than me too. He didn’t need me.

Maybe he was attracted to me. It was hard to tell with his hard to read exterior. I’d be flattered if he was, but I wasn’t interested in a man like him. Besides, I had no time for a relationship in my current life.

Dax looked outside his office before continuing, “I chose you because we’ve known each other for so long.”

Fear crept into my every nerve after hearing those words. I almost felt like my feet couldn’t move from their spot on the floor. I knew that I had never met him, and it terrified me to think that he had been stalking me. I needed to leave and slowly started backing away from him, hoping to escape.

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