Chapter 8

Winter

Who the hell does my mate think he is?! Accusing me of something I didn’t do. Does he honestly think I did something? Does he really think I would commit a crime that would cause me to become a rogue? Does he truly feel I am a criminal? What the fuck is his problem? I am not some common criminal, and he is about to hear a piece of my mind.

“Who the fuck do you think you are? You come here and accuse me of being some sort of criminal. Someone who has broken her pack’s law and was sentenced to become a rogue. Is that what you think of me? How dare you!” I roared.

He looks at me with a shocked expression. Does he think I am some meek she-wolf who can’t defend herself? Does he seriously think I would just roll over to his assumption, and have a civil conversation with him after he asked what I did?

How does he expect me to respond after he puts an assumption out there that I was the cause of my own misfortune? It’s just stupid. I don’t know why he is so shocked that I raised my voice to him. He was the one who came here and started talking like I must have done something to deserve to be pack-less.

I mean I did do something that caused me to be pack-less, but If I had done what I was supposed to do I would have been dead. So, the alternate to being in this position would be my death. I know I need to calm down. He has probably only ever encountered rogues who were just what he thought they were, but that is not me.

I didn’t do anything negative to be in this situation. I hope I can get a grip on my anger toward him. His assumption was just so uncalled for. I hate when people assume things about me. Granted this is not the first time this has happened, and I'm sure it won't be the last.

Cole takes a breath. I can see he is upset with himself for assuming I’m a criminal. He waits a moment before he speaks again in a calm tone. “Look can I just hear what happened. What is the reason you are living as a rogue?”

I take a breath as I get control of my anger. I know he needs answers and I intend to give him the answers he wants. However, the idea of talking about that day is making me feel weak in the stomach. I hate to talk about that day. The day my life was turned upside down. I have regular nightmares about that day. It is painful to think about, and I have never talked with anyone about it. Well, that’s not entirely true. I have talked with Athena about it but no one else.

She is speaking to me in this moment. Athena is telling me it is okay to share our most painful memories with my mate. She reminds me that mates share each other's burdens, and I know she is right. It just makes me uncomfortable talking about it. It is to date the worst day of my life.

I let out a breath and begin to unload my past to my mate. “I was 13, and I heard some older kids talking about a new waterfall they had found. It was off my pack land, and I knew my family wouldn’t let me go outside the boarders of the territory. I was a curious kid. So, naturally I made a plan to sneak out the next time an opportunity presented itself. I was going to find that waterfall.”

“Well, we had a gathering and the whole pack had to attend. All the pack members came into the packhouse. The women with their pups, the elderly, all the warriors. Every single pack member was there. I decided it was the best time to sneak out.”

“No one would know I slipped out, and the patrol would be at the meeting so I knew I could get outside of the territory without my father and mother finding out. I slipped out right as the meeting was beginning.”

“I found the waterfall right where they said it would be. It was beautiful. It was a perfect place for a young kid to have fun. I spent hours there jumping off the top of the falls into the water below. Swimming and splashing. It seemed to be the best day ever. I thought it was at then.”

“After hours and hours of playing the sun was starting to set. I knew I had to get home, or I would be in trouble. I didn’t want to be late for dinner, and I really did not want to have to explain where I had been. Although I knew I was most likely already in for a good yelling for being off territory.”

“I figured the meeting had already finished, and I would encounter some warriors at the boarder when I crossed into the territory. For sure they would tell my parents and I would get in trouble. When I came within the boundaries of our pack land though; I saw no one.”

“At first thought they were still in there meeting, and I had gotten away with my little outing. But I started to smell something bizarre. It was unpleasant and burned my nose. I started to notice there was smoke lots and lots of it.”

“I wondered if my pack had done a bonfire. It didn’t make sense though. It wasn’t a new moon, and it was not even dark yet. Not to mention the smoke was carrying the worst smell I had ever smelt, and bonfires smell wonderful.”

“I went up to the pack house and found it in burnt smoldering ruins.” I was choaking back the tears at this point trying to get the rest of my history out. “I looked and looked, but I couldn’t find anyone from my pack. They had all been in the packhouse. My mother... my father... my pack. They were all gone, and I was alone.”