My Fight

Her blonde hair seems like gold that sparkled in the sun plunged over her shoulders. Her eyes blue like two sapphires, hidden often showing a peek beneath her thick lashes and her lips plump and red that seems blossom soft in a pout. Delicate ears frame a button nose. A set of dazzling, angel-white teeth gleams when she smiles. Her body sculpted by the gods gifting her with thick hips her curves that would make any male fall on their knees to have her. This is Theia, her beauty so bright that at times I feel the need to cover my eyes from the aura she gives away.

I sometimes wonder why some are blessed by the moon goddess and seem to have "perfect" everything, while I wallow in my self-pity breaking apart lying on the ground bleeding and no one seems to notice. No one... including your mate. It's a slow death. It's like you are burning yourself from the inside as that's the only way you can stop yourself from crying out. You who are meant for greatness happily walk into the cage you built for yourself.

Days have passed by since Theia has been here. Each day is haunting, making me not want to wake up in the morning just so I don't see them. Every morning they run together and I can't help but feel jealous. It's not normal envy, it's a painful one. She has everything with him that I need as a mate. I stopped running these days, just so my eyes don't have to take in their scene. I can't take it, I can't take the pain every time he looks at her gently and chuckles softly to her jokes. Every time she touches him and every time he touches her they are slowly peeling away my flesh, leaving me bare to the heart-wrenching pain that follows.

But my wolf pushes me to gather strength often telling me we can overcome this, but she's stronger than I am. The difference between us is that she stands tall while I fall apart. So she lends me her strength for today, for what is to come. She is preparing me for something, I feel it in my bones. My heart is wary and my mind is cautious. I don't know if I am ready to take it head-on. But I know I must do this. To find out about their relationship. I need peace.

Going down for breakfast, the pack has gathered at the table. My eyes scan the room searching for Deimos and widen I find he is not present. He is not here and so is Theia. Sitting at the right head chair of the table I wait with the other wolves. The Luna waits for her male who is dallying around with another female. But I keep my head high, back straight. I am Luna and I will act like one. The tension around the room is disrupted by a door opening and the high pitched laugh of a female, a female I can easily recognize. Theia. So my sensations were right, they were together.

They stop mid path eyes widening when they see us all at the table. I feel Deimos's eyes on me, but I spare this male not even a single glance keeping my eyes straight on the table. Clearing his throat he walks to my left and plops down while Theia sits on his left, a seat specially saved for her. A seat she didn't have to fight for, something that was given without a question when asked.

"I apologize for the delay, I barely knew the time that passed by. You may all start eating." Deimos's loud voice booms across the hall and with those words he stabs my heart as always. Didn't know the time that passed by? How long were they together? Does she keep his mind that busy? That he can't think of anything but her and what they were doing? My lips wobble, my shield will fall soon. My thoughts are interrupted when I take notice of Theia's ring. She wears it on proudly. The colour of the ring reminds me of something but I can't seem to remember it.

I keep feeling both Theia's and Deimos's eyes on me through out the breakfast. Deimos is probably wondering why I am so quiet and why I haven't looked at him even once. Well, let him figure it out. I have no words for him until I find what I'm searching for. Finishing my meal first before the others I get up, the screech of my chair against the floor catching everyone's attention. Silence takes over the room.

"Thank you for the meal, I quite enjoyed it." I show the females my sincere gratitude in return receiving warm smiles They are happy, they pleased their Luna. If everything goes down at least I'll have my females who will resurrect me from the dead. I walk out of the breakfast hall to the secluded heat of Deimos's castle. I take slow steps letting the breeze flow through my hair. Closing my eyes, I take in a deep breath of nature's scent. Nature can heal the scars of those who are broken. It came to my aid every time I was bleeding and here it is again.

My peace is cut short by Deimos's scent overtaking my senses pushing away nature's. Slowly turning around I look at him, really look at him. Is he worth my suffering? Is he worth to fight for? Is he worth to bleed for? Is.. is he worth to die for?

"How can I help you?" My formal tone ruffles him. He doesn't seem to like it. Good, I'll do it more often.

"You have been quiet today? Why?" He asks me his voice calm and cold as always. This male barely talks to me unless he has questions of my inattentiveness towards him. So how can he speak gently with her? How does his tone change when he speaks to her?

"Answer me, mate." He is quite persistent, isn't he? And what will he do when he knows of my inner turmoil? Nothing. That is Deimos.

Loud laughter bubbles through my chest out my mouth. Looking at him eye to eye I tell him what we both already know. "Don't pretend to care Deimos, I can see through you." This time it's my voice that turns cold. His eyebrows loop down to a frown, with that I begin my walk away from him. Grabbing my elbow in his hand he turns me around with a harsh tug so we stand face to face with no space between us.

"What's wrong with you? Why are you acting like this?" His question annoys me, sparking anger.

"What's wrong with me?" I laugh once more. "No, the question here is what's wrong with you Deimos?" I tug my hand back from his grip. "When you have the answer to that, come find me." His frown deepens to my answer and this time he walks away. So that's how much he will fight for me?

Walking back to his castle. The eerie quietness adds to my depressed state. I wish for something more. Something warm. I want to fill this lonely castle with laughter and joy. I want my pups running around and mostly I want him by my side. Standing next to me, holding one of our pups looking down at me with warmth and love in his eyes. Tears flow down my cheeks as my mind shows me pictures of what I could have but would forever remain a dream. Wiping my tears I climb the stairs to my room. I need to save my tears for what is to come.

Mid path I come face to face with Theia. We both stop just looking at each other. I do not want to start a conversation with her, I see no need for it. Trying to walk past her she stops me with her soft voice. "Would you like to have some tea with me in my room?" She asks me with curious eyes. With a single nod from my side, we both head to her room.

Sitting down on her bed she pours me some tea handing it to me. Thanking her I begin taking small sips. My eyes scanning her room slowly trying to understand her personality through how her room is structured. Overall it's filled with bright colours considering her bubbly personality, it suits her quite well.

"It's great to finally meet you." Her voice breaks my thoughts. Looking at her telling her to continue indirectly. "You are more beautiful than I imagined." She whispers a soft smile across her lips. "And I still can't believe you were an Alpha."

"Are." I reply, my chest puffing up voice strong.

"I'm sorry?" She doesn't understand what I'm trying to tell her.

"Are an Alpha. I will always be an Alpha." I tell her my truth. Her eyes widen a little while she replies with a small nod.

"Of course." She says once more in her honey-coated voice. "I have something to show you." She tells me as she picks up a photo from her shelf. Bringing the picture towards me she sits down next to me showing it to me.

"This is Deimos and me when we were pups." She tells me sparking my curiosity as I snatch the picture from her hands to see how Deimos looked like a pup. I see a little male playing the guitar looking towards a small female, while she looks at the camera. "This was when he played his first song he wrote for me." She says while skimming the picture looking at it fondly.

"Who took the picture?" I ask. I want to know more about his past, even if it has to come out of her mouth.

Her eyes sadden to my question and with a heavy sigh, she answers me. "His parents took it.. this was the last time we saw them."

"What? Why? What happened?" I ask her breathless. Did they travel to a far away country or something? I thought they lived separately from Deimos.

"They died. They were killed when Deimos turned ten." She whispers in a sad voice. "That's why we are pretty close, Deimos and I. He lived with us for a while until he was mature enough to move out back here and sit on his throne."

"Oh, I didn't know that." I look deeper into the picture, I wish I was the one to rescue him. Perhaps things would be different between us now.

"I know Deimos doesn't talk much but give him time, he'll come around. Until then if you need anything I am here." She smiles gently at me. With a nod, I reply to her my thanks for the tea and the small insight on his past. Perhaps I was wrong maybe they were just friends. I was just overthinking, of course, they are close. They must have gone through a lot together and picked up the other in time of need.

The day flows through smoothly, that I spend reading my book and yet I am unsettled, I do not understand. I figured out their relationship so why do I still feel his way? Putting on my evening dress getting ready for dinner. I hear Ragon calling out to me with a knock from outside the door.

"Come in, Ragon." He comes in and bows deeply.

"Forgive me, Luna but I can't do this anymore. I must tell you something." He seems in a rush. What's going on? Did something bad happen?

"What is it? Tell me." My voice calm, I don't want to ruffle him further.

"It's about the question you asked me last time, about Alpha's and Theia's relationship."

"Yes, I know they are merely friends, she acknowledged it today." She calmed the storm that was brewing in my heart.

"No, Luna. They aren't merely friends. They were..." He pauses thinking whether to tell me or not. No! Moon Goddess please let it not be what I think it is. My wolf calms my skin side. This is what she was preparing me for. It shall finally come to light.

"Say it, Ragon. My wolf is sharing with me her strength. She prepared me for this so go ahead." *I show him my fight. *