A duty to please
This was strange, how could she prefer the touch of a stranger to the touch of the one she was supposed to spend the rest of her life with? The mate bond gave the answer to that question. She noticed that Ray was still kissing her; she found it strange that he was enjoying this whereas she wasn't. Didn't he know that what he was giving her was far from pleasure? She felt bad about how she felt; Lucas's touch was supposed to be the one that repelled her, but no, it was exactly the other way around.
Ray then brought his hand to touch her breasts, and she pulled away from his kiss at that moment, panting heavily. He saw her expression and dropped his head in his hand, he was disappointed but tried well to hide it.
"I'm sorry," she muttered.
"No, no, I should be the one apologizing, I know how you said we should wait and all, but I find it hard to restrain myself whenever I'm with you."
Ray reminding Ava of the reason she refused him whenever he tried made her guilty the more. Whenever he tried to touch her in the past, she'd told him she wanted to wait until they were joined, that she didn't want to have sex with him outside their union, he loved her for this and respected her so much for her decision. She'd kept her virginity for Ray, and just like that she gave it all to Lucas last night without him even asking, like the fool she was.
She wished she could tell Ray everything here and now, she knows he'd forgive her but she just couldn't bring herself to say it. Ava wished she and Ray had that form of closure that made it hard for couples to keep things from each other, but she knew it was all just wishful thinking.
She leaned closer to hug Ray, pulling him into her arms, he rested his head on her bosom, and her hands found their way into his blonde curls, stroking. Ray wasn't bad at all, even his kisses weren't; she just didn't know why she couldn't feel anything for him even though she'd tried so hard. She felt his breath against her chest then and looked down at him.
He then asked her something she didn't expect.
"Can I suck your boobs?" He raised his eyes to look at her pleadingly, the question surprised her, typical Ray had never asked her for something like that so openly, before he'd just go right ahead to kiss or touch her even still knowing she'd refuse him at the back of his mind, but he still tried anyway.
She gave him her answer.
It might or might not help to ease the guilt she felt, but if it would give him pleasure without her having to sleep with him, then she at least owed it to him before she would tell him everything that happened last night. She wanted to please her Alpha even though deep down she wanted someone else, so she unbuttoned her shirt without hesitation, baring her firm breasts before him as she removed her bra. He stared at her nipples hungrily before taking one of them into his mouth, slowly, he sucked on her tender breasts; teasing and stroking with his tongue and teeth, suckling on her peaked nipples till they turned red, but yet she still couldn't feel anything, she didn't want to ruin the moment; she had to pretend like she was enjoying it, so she arched her head back and moaned for him to think she was, but she truly wasn't. The feeling of being with Ray didn't compare to the feeling of Lucas's mouth on her nipples. It was so unfortunate that Lucas's mouth did the things Ray couldn't to her breasts, it made Ava feel bad, but it was the truth. As he feasted on her tits, she noticed his arousal beneath his trousers. It was sure going to be painful if he wasn't able to come off that, and that's when she realized that letting him suck her breasts did more harm than good.
"Ughh!!!" Ray groaned at the blue ballism feeling that overwhelmed him as he released his mouth from her breasts. Ava knew she had to do something, she couldn't leave him like this, it was her fault that he was this way; she had to find a way to satisfy him before he exploded. And so, without thinking much about it, she went on her knees in between his legs and unbuckled his trousers, freeing his hardened phallus from the confines of his underwear.
She might have been a virgin, but she'd come up with other ways to satisfy Ray when he was horny in the past without sleeping with him. She used her hands to jerk his cock, working and toying swiftly with his length; he moaned and brought his hand to pinch her nipples which were still taut and exposed; she winced but didn't stop him. Ava tried hard with her hands but they still weren't doing the trick; so, she decided to use her mouth instead. She took him in once, trying not to gag as the tip of his cock hit her throat the first time. She pulled his penis out of her mouth immediately before she felt the urge to throw up, not wanting to hurt him, she tried again but made sure not to push him too far back this time, relaxing her throat. As her mouth widened around his girth for the second time, she began bobbing her head up and down continually and controlling her gags each time she took him in too deep. He brought his hand and guided her head as her mouth slammed continuously down touching the base of his phallus. She could feel his preamble release on her tongue already as he fucked her mouth intendedly, and she knew he was almost there; she pushed harder, increasing the pace and letting him hit the back of her throat with each thrust, and then finally, he groaned as his cum spilled all over into her mouth down to the floor. Ava pulled his cock out of his mouth then, her chest heaving as he fell back and dropped his head on the bed, catching his breath too.
After cleaning his cum off her lips, she got up and joined him on the bed, he snaked his hand around her breasts, feeling it's softness once more in his arms.
"Thank you, Ava," he whispered into her ear, and at that point, she assured herself that even if she and Ray weren't attracted to each other, their union could still work.