Friends with Benefits

Chapter 6

Nalzen

I decided to postpone my visit to Nathan. We will go there before we come back to the Philippines. For now, we are just roaming around and enjoying the view as a friend…

Aaron is easy to be with and fun. He has a sense of humor and there are no dull moments with him.

We are at the mall right now. I'd like to try the claw machine. The price is a cute teddy bear. I've been trying for ages but failed.

“Let me try.” He said laughing.

“Well, let's see if you can get one,” I answered happily.

And he did! Not just one but two. He gives it to me. The teddy bears are so cute.

“Here, you keep it. It's our remembrance.” I give him the other one.

“Yeah, I will surely remember this teddy bear that you almost tried all the tokens but failed.” He smiled.

That smile will always catch me off guard. I wish he will not smile at me.

It's a friendly smile, Nalzen…

“Thank you. Are we going to see a movie?” I asked.

“Yeah, let's go.” Then he holds my hand.

Looking at our hands while happily walking towards the Cinema. It is just a friendly gesture. Nothing more, we are just friends.

We decided to watch an action drama. And in the middle of the movie, there is a kissing scene! My face became red, and I move my eyes in the other direction.

And Aaron is teasing me.

“Why? You already have a boyfriend. Kissing scene is just normal.” He said.

“Yeah it's normal for you, but it's holy for me,” I answered. And he laughed again.

“Holy, Care to explain?” He asked.

“It's holy because I will not let anyone kiss me if I don't have feelings with them,” I explained.

Aaron stops laughing and looks at me seriously. I can sense danger the way he gazes at me.

“What about a friendly kiss?” He asked while looking at my lips.

“You are teasing me again. Of course, a friendly kiss will do but on the face.” I answered nervously.

Will he kiss me?

It's just in the face, Nalzen.

You are friends, remember?

I turn to the left to offer my right face, but Aaron didn't kiss me.

What an embarrassment!

Ashamed of what I did. I turn around to face the front, but Aaron's lips are coming, and it touches mine.

Now, what to do?

Our lips were there touching but no one dare to let go.

As if Aaron won't move unless I permit him.

Will I let go? That is what my brain is telling me, but my body is telling the opposite.

My lips started to move on their own! Kissing and giving access to Aaron.

And that's what he's been waiting for. He kissed me gently then torridly.

My gosh, I cannot catch up with him! He is very expert in kissing.

I am not innocent, but I didn't experience this kind of kiss with Nathan.

Oh, what did I do?

Wake up Nalzen!

But how?

I am enjoying the kiss…

But I need to stop this! I pushed Aaron a little, but he didn't stop. He kissed me again, down to my neck. And I can see butterflies flying.

I know that it isn't right, we are supposed to be friends.

What happened?

He wouldn't stop at all.

“Aaron, we need to stop, this is not right. Oh!” It's very embarrassing to let out a moan.

Aaron is just like a drunk man that still kissing my neck.

Did he leave a bite mark?

I push him again. And this time he let go.

I looked around, and the movie has ended!

There are no people except the two of us. How come I was overwhelmed with my emotions!

I felt ashamed and can't look Aaron in the eyes.

And he was only looking at me, for goodness’ sake.

What now Nalzen?

It's very awkward!

I stand up, but he grabbed me.

Now I am sitting on his lap for the second time around again.

Temptation is tempting me!

But this is not right. I struggle to get up as he is strong.

“What's gotten into you?” I asked.

He just chuckled.

“Why? We are in Paris, it's just a friendly kiss.”

What? It's just a friendly kiss for him?

Well, I will never give him the satisfaction to look down on me and tease me all he wants. If it's just a friendly kiss for him, then so be it.

“Okay, we are friends as you said. So, can we go home now?” I changed the topic as I'm not comfortable in this kind of position.

I can feel the hotness in him that radiates all over my body that makes me feel wet inside.

I cannot explain it exactly. It's the first time that I felt something like this.

Then Nathan's face pops out in my mind.

I stand up again and this time Aaron let me go.

“Come on, let's go home,” I told him.

“Hold my hand.” He said smiling.

Oh, that smile that makes my heart melt.

Nalzen, wake up! But well, I still hold his hand.

Yeah, I know I am weak, but I already swear that I will never leave Nathan. This must be stopped or else I will be going crazy.

But how? We need to pretend until two months will end.

Then control yourself!

Oh, my mind is lecturing me, but my body is now holding Aaron's hand walking outside the Cinema.

It felt good and I'm happy. Until we reached our car, we are still holding our hands.

I don't know why Aaron won't let go of me.

“Maybe it's time to let go?” I told him.

“Let go for what?” He open the driver's seat and pushed me inside.

What's gotten into him?

I move to the other seat so that he can sit down on the driver's seat.

Just hey! We are still holding our hands.

“Aaron, can you please let go of my hand?” I asked him again.

But he didn't answer. As if he didn't hear me.

And what kind of Drama is this?

I tried to pull my hand but failed.

“What are you doing?” I asked, being irritated.

He looks like a drunk man the way he smiles at me. But we only drink cola at the Cinema.

Is he crazy?

“I am getting angry now. You know that this is not right!” I shout.

“What is wrong with being friends? It's just a holding hand. Nothing to lose for the both of us. Or are you really in love with Nathan?” His facial expression changed into a devil one.

So, what?

“Yes, of course! He is my long-time boyfriend. And I love him, no need to ask for that.”

His face became sour.

“Okay, I understand.” He answered briefly.

I thought that he will finally let go of my hand, but he is holding it still.

“Then what about my hand?” I ask. He is good at teasing.

“Your hand is right here.” Showing me our entangled fingers.

Just what the!

“Are you joking? Let go of my hand.” I angrily shout.

Yeah, I am losing my patience, just what kind of game that he is implying.

But he didn't listen and started the car. He is driving while holding my hand.

I try to grab my hand, but he is like steel. I'm angry now, for real.

“You said that a kiss for you is holy. So, why did you accept my kiss?” He asks without looking at me.

What should I answer?

That I like him too?

No Nalzen! This cannot be. Don't give the both of you false hope.

Don't let him misunderstand you.

I need to stop this bullshit feeling!

“So, do you think that I like you because I let you kiss me? Then you are wrong! It's just a feeling of lust.” I told him confidently.

And finally, he let go of my hand! But I felt something missing in me.

No, you should control yourself!

And I am only doing the right thing.

Yeah, that's it.

Then he laughed. “Feeling of lust, Is that what you feel?” He asks seriously.

“Yeah, what else did you expect?” I answered.

He suddenly stops the car.

“You said the kiss is holy, and you will never let anyone kiss you unless you like the person. And now you are telling me that it's just lust?” And now Aaron is angry.

I can see the fire within his eyes.

What can I do?

Damn this bullshit rightfulness!

But I still need to stand up for what I said. There's no tomorrow for us. No future!

Someone is waiting for both of us.

“Yes!” That's all I can say.

He suddenly kissed me again. But this time, it's full of force and roughness.

He is torturing me. There's no gentleness at all.

But, what is happening?

My body likes it.