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Chapter 3

When the sun shined through my curtains, I got up and took a shower. I went down stairs and sat next to my mom.

She was sitting while my dad was in the kitchen running here and there. I leaned towards my mom and asked “Why is dad in the kitchen?”

“He said he is going to cook for you so that you are going to be energetic when you go out to find a job.” She explained.

Now I am getting nervous because he is putting too much pressure from now. I had breakfast then went out for job hunting. There was no satisfying place for a business manager. I looked to all the magazines I could find to get a satisfying job but ‘Nada’ There was nothing. Even if I find something and I happen to get an interview, I end up blowing it. For some reason they don’t hire me.

It’s been two weeks since I have left MWD and I am still unemployed. I went to my therapists’ office at the time of my appointment. I sat down in front of DR. Goodman and sign out of exhaustion. She said in her elegant voice “You look exhausted!”

I looked at her “Really, what gave you away?” I spoke sarcastically.

She answered “Well, the dark circle below your eyes sells it but it was mostly your mother Mrs. Jona called and told me.”

“Ya, well I have been looking for a job for two weeks and nothing. If this doesn’t exhaust you, then what does?” I asked her.

“I get that being unemployed is really depressing for you, but is that the real reason you have been so down lately?” she answered me with another question. I got confused.

“What else could I be depressed about?” I asked her.

“I don’t know. Have you been keeping up with your journal?” The whole journal thing was her suggestion.

“Ya, I have.” I answered to her. She asked a follow up question. “Anything you may have recently written could be the reason.” I tried to remember what I wrote recently and the last time I wrote was two weeks ago about what I wished for. I stayed silent for a while and answered her.

“The most recent thing I wrote is about what I wished I would be when I reached twenty four.”

“Most recent, I thought that we agreed you would write every night.”She said.

“We did but I have been getting too tired to write lately. Sorry.”

“It’s alright. So what was your ideal figure of Princi Jona when you reach twenty four?” DR. Goodman asked me.

“It is nothing special. It was being at a nice job while I learn my PhD, being in a great relationship, making my parents proud and stuff…” I answered her.

“And I am assuming you feel like you have failed to fulfill you dream.”

“Yes!” I answered.

She looked at me deeply then she said “I can see how you feel like you have failed. But you have not failed yet Princi. It’s very normal for a person to fill like they have failed when they are in a bad moment of their life. I have seen this in many of my patients. It is common to get in to a bad mood for you in particular is being unemployed. But like I advised everyone else; it is a phase that will pass after a short period of time; but only if you work hard to pass it and if you keep having fate in yourself. But if you keep weighing yourself down like how you are doing right now it will push you to a deeper depression than the one you are already feeling.” I listen to her without missing a point. She continued “So I will not tell you it will be easy to get out of the mood you are in but I will tell you that if you try hard enough to concentrate on your positive life than the negative, the bad things will slowly start to push to the positive.”

I walked home thinking about what DR. Goodman had been saying and I realized that she was completely right. I have been so hanged up on what I thought my life should be and totally forgotten what I already had. All of a sudden I felt better somehow. I walked in with a bright face and kissed mom and dad. They got confused. “Did you get a job?” my father asked me. “Nope” I answered with easy heart. “So why are you jumpy?” my mom asked.

“No big reason. I just feel really relived. I mean the last two weeks I have been worrying about getting the perfect job but it’s just been two weeks. I still have plenty of time left. I mean it’s not like I have been unemployed like dad for my entire life.”

“Hey!” my dad complained. My mom laughed and turning to me she said “Well, it is good to see you in a good mood. And don’t worry; a great opportunity will present its self when the time is right.”

I wished them a goodnight and went up to my room. I sat down and opened my journal but I had nothing new to write. I immediately got depressed. I realized there is literally no excitement in my life. Even at my terrible job I used to get excited thinking maybe tomorrow I will get to use my computer for actual job; but now I have nothing to get excited about when I go to sleep at night and when I wake up in the morning.

The next morning I woke up and went to MCs’. I sat from across of her and sat there in silent. She looked at me “So that job hunt is not going as you planned?”

I answered “No. It’s not going as I planned. Why is it so hard, I mean I have a masters’ degree and two years work experience.”

“No, you have a masters’ degree and two years of coffee delivery experience!” she said sarcastically.

“Is that supposed to be funny?”

“No, you’re right. But I am sure you are going to find a great job really soon.” she tried to comfort me. After a while during I was having a chat with MC I heard a loud noise coming from up stairs. “What is that?” I asked her. She answered “Dad came home today to see us. I am sure you can guess what happened next.”

I got confused. This was the third time this week when MR. Clown came to see MC and Noah and started arguing with their mom.

“I thought your dad only came during holiday seasons. Why does he come all the time?” I asked her.

“Who knows? But every time he comes they say things I have only heard in the movies. And they keep repeating the same thing over and over again.” she answered.

Noah came to the living room and sat down next to me after saying hi. I can see he has been stressed a lot lately so I asked him what was worrying him. He stayed silent for a while then turned to me and answered my question.

“I am just tired of listening to those two arguing. And I am really worried about mom, I mean if dad keeps this up she might go insane and for real this time.”

“There is nothing to worry about…” said MC until he interrupted her.

“Ya, well you are not the one who had to give up NYU for her so don’t go and tell me that there is nothing to worry about.” Noah screamed. I realized that Noah was more upset about not going to NYU more than he had been saying. And I thought MC had realized it too. I looked over to her but instead of feeling bad for making him stay she was getting angry with what he had said.

“Oh, you’ve got to be kidding me, this again. Have we not moved on, I mean when are you going to be a grown up and stop being so selfish like a child.”

Noah got up and left the house.

I got up as well; hopped for her to resolve the problems she was having and went back home. I was taking my key out; standing at my front door, I got a text. I found my keys and opened the door while reading the text I received. I got startled. I couldn’t believe my eyes. I opened the door and went in screaming. Mom and dad were sitting on the couch watching a movie. I jumped in front of the television and screamed again. “What is it now?” my dad asked. “I got an interview at DC!”

They both stood up and hugged me with joy.

“Wait, Where is DC?” asked my mom.

“It is one of the biggest Companies in this city. Ya, the Davis Company has departments you couldn’t count with your fingers and the owners are super rich.” my dad explained. My mom and I got confused on the knowledge my father had on DC but we couldn’t care enough to ask on account of how big my news was. We celebrated but called it a day early so I can get ready for my interview tomorrow.

But the excitement wouldn’t let me sleep. So I got up and opened my journal and realized that the excitements were coming back step by step and that thought cheered me up. I convinced myself to get a sleep so I can be energetic tomorrow. I woke up early and wore my power skirt suit and went down stairs. Both of my parents were up as well. I garbed my bag and went to the front door. My father stopped me and gave me an orange juice. He said “Finish it all it will give you strength.” and so I did. Then my mom ran to me and gave me an egg sandwich and said “Finish it all!” I took the sandwich said “Wish me luck!” and went out of the house.

I was not nervous at all. I took a taxi and got there earlier than I was asked to arrive. I sat in the waiting room listening carefully for my name to be called so I won’t miss it. All of a sudden I started to feel the tension as I saw the number of people who were asked for the same interview as mine. In just a while, a woman came out of the office and called my name. My heart started racing. I took my time and walked in confidently. I sat down in front of three people and there was one empty chair in which the name and title ‘MR. Davis; Executive Director!’ was written. I stayed confident through all the questions except one. I was asked why I wanted this job. I lost words; for a minute I sat there and thought of a good answer but I couldn’t find any. The women repeated the question. Then it hit me.

“I am not going to say that I am the best person for this job; because I am sure you have been listening to it from everyone. I am not going to promise you that I will lead this company to a bright future all on my own. Because: I am just a regular woman that can’t do everything perfectly alone. But as an underutilized employee of another Company, I will make sure to give all I have to offer to this one, because I have always dreamed of having the best job in the world and I really believe that this is the job. So for you question; my answer will be I need this job because this is the one job I have worked for my entire life. And because of that I will not do anything to mess it up.” the perfect answer.

I can see that they liked my answer by the smile on their faces. “Thank you, Miss. Jona. It was a great interview, we will contact you.” said the woman who called me in to the office. “Thank you!” I said with a graceful node and I walked out more confident than it was when I came in.

Two weeks have passed and I still haven’t heard from them. I got depressed. All I do is waiting for a call that will never happen. MC came to visit me out of worry. We talked the usual, me complaining and her comforting me. Then all of a sudden she snapped at me.

“Why did you say you can’t improve everything by yourself? I mean that is probably why they didn’t call.”

“I said that because that is what they want from applicant.” I answered’

“How is that?” she asked again.

“Well the job is a partnering job. There is an opening for a high management job. And it is done by two people. One of the managers got fired and they need a replacement. So it means I had to prove that I can work with others.” I explained to her. While we were conversing about this and that my phone rang.

“Hello?” I answered the call.

“Princi Jona?” asked the voice in the phone.

“This is she.” I answered.

“I am calling from the Davis Company. You had an interview two weeks ago.”

“Yes I did.” I stood up and started walking here and there. I can feel my heart beat about to ripe my chest open.

“I called to let you know that you have got the job. You can start on Monday.”

“Thank you. Thank you, very much.”

After I hanged up the phone, I immediately started to crumble. I screamed ‘I got the job’ over and over. MC got up and hugged me. We celebrated and hopped for a successful first day.

Monday came really slow. I woke up more positive than ever. I wore my work clothe and went down stairs. My mom packed a lunch box like she used to do at my last job. And my dad gave me a small note book filled with motivational phrases. Yes; I take a lunch box to work because I am not that good at making friends at work environment. I left early so I would arrive in time for my first meeting. While I was in the cab I opened the motivation note book my dad gave me and started reading.

I can tell he put lot of work in to writing them because they were characterized in to motivations for the right time. There were some motivations for when I was sick of work, motivations for when I get sleepy, motivations for when I feel like I messed up, motivation for when I am angry and motivations for when I get scared. But on the last page it said “You are the best thing that happened to me and I hope you don’t get in a situation where you have to read the motivations. Love dad!” He has never been much of a motivator but I can tell he wrote it from his heart. On my way for my first day, MC calls to check up on me. I answered the phone. She immediately began to give me advice.

“I forgot to tell you a very important method. No matter what you do, you must kiss your bosses ass.”

Her sincerity made me laugh. “And why would I?” I asked her. She always has an answer to every question. “It is so that you would get ahead than others through buttering up the executive director.”

I answered to her “I don’t need to kiss anyone’s ass to do well. I will let my skills do the kissing.”

“You are such an idiot.” she said.

"Oh, by the way, i heard the son of the CEO is actualy the most beautiful man to ever live. I suggest you loss your weird and suck it up."

While I was talking to her I remembered that I haven’t even met my boss. So I started to wonder what he might be like. All I know about him is that his last name is Davis. Shortly after I hanged up the phone, I arrived at DC. I got out of the taxi walked in. I can feel my skin getting tighter. All I had is my power suit and the little motivation note book. I was told that there would be a meeting and I was there on time. While I was walking towards the elevator, the door started to close. So I screamed “Hold the elevator!”

Whoever was in there held the doors open. I walked fast to the elevator and there he was. A quite handsome stranger: with his sea blue eyes staring at me. And for some reason I immediately froze…

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