CHAPTER 4:

People watch me walk down the halls like a hawk, its like suddenly the world knows who I am and it feels like I'm being violated. I just want them to stop noticing me, my twin is the one that is good at being the centre of attention. "This wasn't the plan," someone hisses.

"Plans change and.... oh hey Faye," Ruby smiles. I look between her and Jake in curiosity, he rolls his eyes and pushes off the locker and walks off grumpily.

"What's the plan?" I ask.

"Uh he's just grumpy because he has to be a fake boyfriend, he says he's not free. Whatever that means," Ruby rolls her eyes.

"Is there a problem with you and Prince Charming?" Mai Brett smirks. "You know... I can always have him," she grins evilly. Why is she so evil looking yet so gorgeous? How can she do that? Mai Brett is one of Chad's occasional flings, he has poor taste in girls. She doesn't respect herself or anyone, she just flings herself at the closest guy. She was once good like all the people here, yet they changed to try and fit into our society.

"Back off biatch," Ruby growls. Mai rolls her eyes and looks at me, I stay silent and look away like the weak little girl I am.

"Got yourself a guard dog Lacuna?" She looks me over in disgust.

"Hey! Only I can call her that, she's my little Lacuna," my posture straightens as I hear that voice. I spin around, a grin on my face as I see Tyrese standing there in all his glory. I run up to him and jump on him, giving him the biggest hug ever.

"Tyrese, what are you doing here?" I exclaim happily. I wish he were still here, but you have to graduate at one time right. This is my final year, I keep reminding myself. No more bullying. No more Chad... well not as much. No more Mai... no more anyone. No more hurting.

"Well Little Lacuna, I came here to talk to the principle about a few things. I've heard that Chad and Nick have been giving you a hard time?" He frowns.

"Tyrese, you already knew that they did. You witnessed it, but it's gotten worse since you've graduated. I don't really want to talk about that while you're here and I haven't seen you in ages! How's life been? Have you been studying? I need to meet your girlfriend! What's her name again?" I ask.

"Wow, wow, wow. Calm down Little Lacuna. Life has been alright, yes I have even studying- law is hard as f*ck. Her name is Amy, bloody hell you need to meet her because she is amazing," he smiles, looking off into space. I click my fingers, trying to get his attention.

"Um, Faye?" Ruby questions. I look at her and smile apologetically, I completely forgot that she's here! How could I be so rude?

"I'm so sorry, Ruby this is Tyrese.... he's like a big brother to me. Tyrese, this is Ruby Jakobs," they shake hands and Ruby looks around in panic. "What's wrong?" I whisper.

"Jake doesn't look too happy, Faye. Trust me when I say you don't want to witness when he's angry," I look where she's looking. Jake is staring at me, his eyes dark and his posture tense. What's his problem? Have I done something?

"Well Little Lacuna, Ruby, I must say goodbye now. See you tonight Lacuna," he hugs me and shakes Ruby's hand then he's off. Jake chargers over here and looks at Ruby in anger.

"Why?" She understands what he's talking about but I don't. I don't have a clue. He looks at me with so much hatred that I have to take a step back.

"What have I done?" I ask in confusion.

"More than you know," he spits. Ruby nudges him, people are stopping and starting to stare. Why is it that people always seem to get mad at me for no reason? It's like I'm a target and it never stops.

"People are staring," Ruby points out my exact thoughts.

"I don't care, Ruby. She doesn't matter to us, so why are we doing this?" My eyes widen and I try so hard not to shed a single tear. I was right, everything good always gets destroyed and I don't know why I think anything will last. I begin walking backwards, Ruby tries speaking but I shake my head.

"She matters to me," Ruby says so quietly that I almost didn't hear her. I spin around and walk in the opposite direction to them.

||

"What have I done to deserve all of this punishment? Did I do something in my past life lord?" I cry to no one but the sky as I sit on my rock in my forrest. "Are things going to get easier?" I cry.

I feel a rain drop, drop onto my arm and the crack of thunder makes me jump slightly and look up at the sky.

See what I mean? My life actually sucks. The rain is soo pelting down over me and I can't even hear myself thinking. I jump off the rock and begin to run out of the forrest. I trip and scratch my leg against a branch, I hiss in pain and my hair honestly feels so heavy. Everything feels so heavy. I use my hands to support myself, the ground is muddy and it sloshes as I stand up. My clothes and everything is covered in the dirty gross mud. Squinting, I see a dark shadow making my heart beat accelerate. Three minutes later, I'm out of the forest and on my way to the cafe. Everyone looks at me as I leave trails of mud on the ground, I feel bad for the people that have to clean the floors.

After ordering my usual I see Ray in the car so I rush out in the rain and get in the car. Ray looks at me and sighs, passing me a towel. "Bad day?" I shrug and look out the window, not wanting to reply.

Everything is going to fast. I just need it to slow down. My life usually goes fast as things seem to happen so fast for me. Like this. And I would do anything just to stop it all for one moment, just to stop and breathe.... to feel free. I don't say anything as I get out of the car, it's still pouring with rain but I don't run. I just walk calmly to the doors and walk inside. "Faye! We've been so worried, where have you been? Oh my god! What has happened to you? Why are you so muddy?!" Mum exclaims in panic.

"Mum... calm down. I'm here now. I'm fine, as you can see... it's just a little mud and a few scratches, it doesn't even matter." I shrug it off, she gives me a stern look and clicks her tongue.

"Go up stairs and have a warm shower, dinner will be ready by the time you're out and we can discuss a few things," Oh no. That's not usually very good. I run up the stairs, taking the two steps at a time until I'm in my room- stripping all my dirty clothes in the bath tub. I turn on the hot shower and step in, feeling happy as I feel all the mud sliding down my body and right off me. I've never felt anything better. I scrub my body from head to toe, the scratch goes from just below my knee to above my ankle. I've never had a longer scratch than that. It's not bad though, it's just a scrape. After I'm done showering, which includes dried and dressed, I walk down the stairs and straight to the dining room where I can smell food. Dad, mum and Nick are sitting down. I couldn't be happier that it's just us, usually everyone is over and it gets really overwhelming as all I want is time to myself and space to breathe.

After we start digging into the delicious dinner, which is fettuccine Alfredo. I feel everyone's stare on me and I know they all have questions. I wasn't even that late home. Maybe they're just worried because I came home muddy and a tiny bit scraped. Dad bangs his fist on the table, "where the f*ck did you go to get so muddy and scratched up?" He demands to know. His eyes glaring at me in complete anger, everyone is silent as they wait for my reply.

"I was just walking and it started raining, shortly I slipped in a mud patch and there happened to be a branch that scraped against me. So, I didn't really go anywhere... please stop stressing," I huff and cross my arms over my chest.

Dad's about to open his mouth, his face is almost like a tomato and I know he's red in anger. Mum stops him from getting beyond furious by placing her hand on his and whispering something in his ear. His tense shoulders relax and he takes deep breaths, looking at the ceiling and I know he's counting in his head. "You're not lying?" He tilts his head.

I shake my head, "no."

||

"So how's your boyfriend doing?" Nick asks as I throw a packet of chips into the trolley. I turn my head back to throw him a glare, then I continue on getting all the things mum needs. Her list is massive, I don't know why she needs this much food. How many people is she inviting? Well I guess cause my whole family and family friends group is quite large and we need a lot of food for that. The list is three pages, what's worse is that next to some ingredients there's a "times 5" note.

This has got to be really expensive. I think mum likes food like wayyyyy too much. But then again, you can never like food too much.

"Do you have to keep bringing him up?" I blandly say. We aren't even friends, that's the funny thing.

"I'm curious," I can imagine him shrugging.

"I see that you've got Chad to back off," I take note of as I continue grabbing five packets of salt and vinegar chips. "We need to go to the cold section," I mumble and begin walking to that exact direction while Nick follows behind. I'm glad it's Saturday, this week has been too much for me.

"You're lucky. It took a lot of convincing. Maybe you should be more cooperative?" He makes a terrible suggestion which makes me snort.

"He's the one that needs to change. I don't know what happened to the old Chad, but this new Chad is not good and it isn't impressive nor attractive," I grumble.

"Other girls find him attractive, most girls do actually.." He chirps in his opinion.

"Firstly, those girls have no class. Secondly, they probably don't even find him attractive but when they hear about how he has a penis... that's when they go bat sh*t crazy. If they knew how big of ajerk off he is, they wouldn't even think positive of him," I say my honest opinion.

Nick laughs, "yeah right! I know that they find him sexy because he is in fact sexy. There's no denying that."

"Are you sure you don't bat for the same team?" I glance back at him before grabbing the amount of milk needed.

"Why is it okay for a girl to say that a girl is pretty but guys can't say guys are sexy?" He huffs, crossing his arms over his chest.

"I honestly don't know. But you're asking me when you've ruined all my relationships with my friends, so I really wouldn't have a clue Nick," he sighs and grabs the cheese and meat.

"Isn't that your boyfriend right there?" He asks, I look at him and roll my eyes- not believing him at all. "What? I'm being serious. Look," he points and I look to where he's pointing, I then slap his arm down so Jake won't notice.

"Don't point."

"He's only your boyfriend, Faye. Go say hi and give him a big smooch and some cuddles too," I try so hard not to slap him. I roll my eyes and huff, looking over at Jake. He's with a guy I've never seen before. He looks older than Nick and I, they're talking quite freely.

"No, I'm not going over to him," I growl at my brother, slapping his shoulder and turning back to the cold food.

"And why's that?" He appears next to my ear and I growl in frustration. I swing my hand at him, he slaps my hand away and gets closer. "Awww, going through a rough patch at the moment?" He pouts 'sadly' it is no where near sad at all.

"Yes, we are actually. So don't even say his name, look over at him, mention anything about him to me or even think about him! Just let's go to the vegetable section," I feel frustrated and I really don't want him to see me at all. I need to get to the furtherest section of the store away from him.

Before we begin our escape, I glance over at him. He's staring at me. No. No. No. he's seen me! This is very very bad. He's rude, I'm not going to speak to him... I'm just going to walk away. And I run like the flash out of there.