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Chapter 4 - Sex with the best friend part 1

CHAPTER 4

JENNIFER

You’ve certainly had a cute best friend or you’ve always had a certain hidden attraction, that’s my case.

I shouldn’t, but I am deeply attracted to the person who has been with me all my life, supporting and protecting me from all harm.

They say that there is no friendship between man and woman, I disagreed with this for a long time, but each has his case and his beliefs.

I’ve known Rafa since I was five, it’s been many years, but I can still remember my joy when the blonde boy moved into the house next to mine, from that moment we were inseparable and almost twenty years later our friendship remains strong.

But I developed a kind of desire for my friend that is ruining my reasoning, it’s all my fault and I don’t know how to solve this damn problem without ruining the lasting friendship.

Until in a moment of fragility, I made a big mistake, I kissed him and let everything roll in the heat of the moment, I should be very sorry, but the worst is that I’m not.

Since that night I dream of reliving that moment for the second time...

A FEW NIGHTS AGO...

I don’t know how long I’ve been moping on this couch stuffing myself with all kinds of bullshit, I should be worried about my cholesterol rising or possible diabetes from so much candy I’ve eaten in the last few hours.

But my thoughts are wandering through the horrendous images I had the displeasure of seeing this afternoon, there is no pain worse than catching, someone, you believe you love by fucking another person you hate.

That’s exactly what happened when I went to surprise Bernardo’s house, where we would spend a romantic afternoon celebrating our third anniversary. But my silly plans were destroyed when I caught my boyfriend eating the cow of the woman I hate most in the world.

At that moment I questioned the love I felt for him, whether that feeling I felt every time I was with him was love, or whether I was deluding myself for all these years by believing I loved someone I never loved.

I should be crying right now, but my tears ran out when I walked out of that house stumbling over the anger I was feeling, he tried to follow me and say that wasn’t what I was thinking.

But only an imbecile says that after being caught cheating, that is, he also did not love me, because if he loved him he would not do something as abominable as this with me, I would be enough for him.

When I arrived in my room the first thing I did was break and tear everything that reminded him, that is, I practically destroyed my entire room in a fit of rage.

And now I’m sunk on the couch watching movies and series that celebrate love, I always believed that there was a feeling that united two people strongly, but with every comment or romantic action of the scenes I’m watching on television, I laugh ironically.

The sound of a new notification is heard from my cell phone on the coffee table, I want to throw the device on the wall if it is another attempt of Bernardo to try to contact me.

Come to think of it, if he’s texting me, I swear I’ll tell him to fuck off for the thousandth time today, but my best friend’s name pops up on the screen and I rush to open the message:

"I swear I’ll kill the bastard! Motherfucker!"

A small unarmed smile sprouts on my lips when I remember Rafa and his protective way of taking care of me, I love him too much, and without knowing what I would do without him.

He turned my lifeline after my parents died in a car accident five years ago, since then he has been taking care of me, providing me with care and support at any time I need it.

I needed him on the way home, called crying and sobbing as he asked me to tell him what had happened, with difficulty I could partially tell what had happened.

And he did as expected, he treated me with affection and supported me when I was collapsing, but also repeated one of his various pieces of advice about Bernardo, Rafa never liked my ex”boyfriend and always made it very clear to me that he was not the right man for me.

Stupid and inattentive the way I am, I didn’t take your advice and I screwed up...

I type a quick response just finishing eating a whole pack of Doritos:

"You don’t have to, if he comes to talk to me again, I’ll take that shotgun Dad left and shoot him in the middle of his legs..."

I leave my phone by my side while I take a long sip of my cold Coke.

Despite going through one of the worst days, I have the pleasure of tasting and eating everything I want ahead of Before I had a diet that did not allow me to eat any of this, and I made this sacrifice for Bernardo who liked thin women.

But fuck you, man!

The movie I’m watching begins a beautiful wedding scene, my eyes are glued to the screen watching every single detail, the wedding dress, the rings, the groom...

I can’t deny that in my head I had plans to marry the bastard in the future, it would be perfect and our children would be even more perfect.

But deep down, it was better to find out he’s that kind of man than to spend a lifetime eating someone who doesn’t appreciate me.

My phone starts ringing announcing a call and when Rafael’s name appears I answer the call quickly:

“Are you okay? I want to smash the motherfucker’s face, Jenny!"

I get up from the couch feeling my body hurt from staying too long in the same uncomfortable position, with the cell phone in my ear I hear the sound of punches and kicks, I predict that Rafael is in the gym training as he always does when he comes home from work.

“I feel humiliated and used, but I’ll be fine, Rafa..."

“I know you perfectly well to know when you’re well, you called me sobbing two hours ago, impossible you be well, Jenny!"

I roll my eyes walking around the room and watching that the dress I bought to impress the unfortunate is all dirty and sticky sugar, snitching and going to the room to wear one of my comfortable pajamas.

“You may know me well, but I know what I feel and I’m fine!"

I insist, but I freeze on my bedroom door when I see the mess I made everywhere, there are torn photos and papers everywhere.

“I’m going to stay with you, I’ll be there in ten minutes..."

“You don’t have to!"

I walk through the mess taking extreme care of the broken glass shards of the frames thrown on the floor and open my wardrobe, but my eyes are drawn to a big teddy bear that Rafa gave me on my seventh birthday and since then I keep it with the greatest affection, I still remember the words he told me when he handed me the soft pet.

*To you Jenny! He will be your protector when I’m not around, but I promise you will always be in my heart...

I leave the phone on speaker on top of the dressing table, take the teddy bear, and hug closing my eyes then the tears are back when I see myself thinking of going back in time.

Where there was only innocence, where the world was colorful, and the world where my parents were still alive.

Everything accumulates inside me, and soon I start sobbing hugged with the toy.

“Jenny? Talk to me, please!"

“I need you, Raph! I need you here...", I sit on the floor crying out of control.

“I’m going dolly, when I get there I’ll hug you and never let go the same way we did as a child, remember?”

“My mission was never to let someone hurt you and I failed, but I promise no one else will make you suffer..."

“Why did they leave me, Rafa? I miss them so much, why does everyone abandon me?", outbreak with the body shaking.

“I am here and I will never abandon you, doll, no matter what comes..."

“We always stay together...", complete our motto that we created when we were children.

“I’m coming and nothing will separate me from you, I promise, Jenny..."

I take a deep breath cleaning the tears that descend without control, I get up with difficulty and keep the bear in its place, while Rafa continues talking to me I go back to the room and unlock the front door.

After minutes that seem endless, I hear the door opening, I get up from the couch quickly, and when I see the body of my friend I run throwing myself on it hugs me, and lifts me from the floor.

“I’m here now, Jenny...", he lets me wipe my tears and caresses my face with affection.

A little calmer with his presence, I move away a little and face my friend who is with rebellious blonde hair wet from a recent bath with his usual black leather jacket.

He intertwines our hands and pulls me to the couch where his eyes watch the mess of food I made on the coffee table.

“The room is worse...", I murmur snuggled on his shoulder making him drop a low laugh.

“If I said you’re turning into a mess, will you take your father’s rifle?", he pranks trying to improve my mood and he succeeds quickly.

It’s amazing the power that his presence has over me, it’s like it’s a tranquilizer that I need at all times, and it’s addictive to be in his company.

“I know you’re tired of listening to my warnings and advice about that guy, but you know he wasn’t the right man for you, right?", your thumb traces and pulls my chin gently making me stare at him.

I sign with my head still unable to touch the subject that still hurts me, we are a good time so cozy in each other until your question takes me by surprise:

“Do you love him, Jenny?", my body gets stiff thinking of some answer.

“I don’t know, sometimes I think so, but sometimes I don’t...", whisper.

“He certainly doesn’t deserve a girl as good and special as you...", he murmurs depositing a kiss on my forehead as he settles me on his shoulder.

“More than one thing I’m sure...", I say attracting his attention.

“Of what?"

“That I love you...", I raise my head watching a beautiful smile form on your perfect lips.

Rafael is a beautiful man who refuses to have serious relationships saying that the woman he wants and expects is forbidden, I never understood this part well, and whenever I ask he changes the subject quickly.

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