Read with BonusRead with Bonus

Chapter 4

4

MARA

“I have to go.” Tham’s whisper pulled Mara from sleep.

She curled into the warmth of his chest, wrapping her arms around him as though she could push back the sunrise through mere defiance.

“Mara.”

She could hear the smile in his voice. The easy, gentle tone he so rarely used with anyone else.

“What if I say no?” Mara kissed his chest. His thick muscles built from a childhood at sea and years of training with the Soldiers Guild relaxed at her touch. “What if I say you can’t leave me? That you have to stay here with me forever?”

“Then I’ll gladly accept your decision.” Tham pressed his lips to the tangles of her curly, red hair. “But in an hour, my commander will start looking for me. Soon after, Lord Karron will start looking for you.”

Mara threw the covers back with a huff, letting the cold of the morning steal the last of her happy dream. “Fine. You’re right. Duty and importance, and all those wonderful things must outweigh my will to stay happily in bed.”

Tham crawled out over her, not even bothering to try and make her get up first. With a twist of the key, the lamp lit, filling the room with its dim glow. The dull light cast shadows across the deep scars on Tham’s back. Ancient reminders of his punishment for the first time he’d saved her life.

Mara caught Tham around the middle, kissing the deepest scar before pressing her cheek to his back. “Are you meeting with Lord Kearney this morning?”

“We’ve all been called to the barracks hall.” Tham lifted Mara’s hands, kissing her palms before releasing himself from her grasp.

“Do you know what he’ll say?” Mara found her green pants on the floor, giving up any pretense that she might go back to sleep once Tham left. “Do you know where you’ll be sent?”

The question hung in the air as Tham dragged on his black pants and thick leather boots. “The King wants peace in the southern country. Most of the soldiers will probably be sent there. He wants unguilded trained as soldiers, too, so some will stay in Ilara to help with training, or maybe be sent out to recruit. But I don’t think I’ll be wanted for either of those.”

“Because you should stay with the map makers.” Mara fought to keep her tone even. “You’ve been guarding the journeys for two years now, ever since you were given your mark. We have three journeys going out by the King’s orders. Two to territories we’ve never explored. I know Lord Karron had other plans as well―”

“Mara.” Tham caught her hands. She hadn’t even realized she been flinging them about. “Lord Kearney knows my experience. He knows my strengths. He’ll send me where he will.”

“You could ask―”

“It doesn’t work for soldiers the way it does for map makers.” Tham pulled her into his arms, letting her bury her face against his bare chest. “If I asked to stay with you, they would know.”

“Let them.” Mara tipped her chin up to look into Tham’s dark eyes. It was so easy to remember when they’d met a few short years ago, when the thought of being separated was only a distant nightmare. “I don’t care if they know about us. What will it do, ruin my chance of catching a proper husband?”

It was the wrong thing to say. She knew it the moment the words fell from her lips.

His whole body stiffened as he let go of her.

“You chose to be a map maker, Mara. You knew going in you wouldn’t be allowed to marry.” Tham yanked on his shirt, hiding his dark skin beneath the smooth, black fabric.

“I know.” Mara caught his hand. “I wanted to be a map maker. I gave up the protection of marriage. I made that choice.”

“And I stay.” There was no anger in his voice, only sadness, which hurt Mara worse than any fury. “I crawl into your window at night, hiding in the shadows, so no one knows I’ve been here. The only time I ever pray to Saint Dannach is when I pray to be sent wherever you go. I want to fight by your side, Mara. I would gladly die to defend you.”

“Tham―”

“I will climb into your window whenever you’ll have me for the rest of my days.” Tham took Mara’s hand and placed her palm on his chest. “But never forget I would marry you in an instant. I would have married you the day you came of age. You chose to be a map maker. I never had a choice in loving you.”

Mara rose up on her toes, wrapping her arms around Tham’s neck.

“I know.” She brushed her lips against his cheek, reveling in the roughness of his early morning stubble. “I love you. More than anything in Ilbrea, I love you. If there were a way―”

“There’s not.” Tham kissed her forehead. “You’re a map maker. I’m a soldier. The best we can do is pray the Guilds keep us together.”

“And if Allora demands Lord Karron assign you as my guard?”

“Only a fool would try to stop Allora Karron from doing anything her heart desires.”

“And if I begged Allora to demand you be assigned to me?” Mara kissed Tham’s neck.

“There is nothing in Ilbrea that can stop Mara Landil when she wants something.”

She could hear the smile in his voice as she kissed his cheek.

“And if I’m on the journey to the white mountains,” Mara teased, “would you be trapped in the snow for me?”

“Mara”―Tham took her face in his hands, interrupting the trail of her kisses―“I have faced death and danger by your side. I will spend my life keeping you safe, even if it means facing a terrible wall of snow.”

Mara leaned in, catching his mouth in a kiss before he could speak again. “I love you,” she whispered as he pulled away.

“And I love you, Mara. More than the stars.”

Before her heart could find a steady rhythm, he’d stepped away and grabbed his jacket from the chair.

“Just a few more minutes,” Mara begged, though she knew it would do no good. “Please, just a little longer.”

“If I don’t go now, I never will.” A cold gust of air flew through the room as Tham slid the window open. “And if I’m marched out of the Soldiers Guild, there will be no hope of my following you as you map our world.”

“I hate it when you’re sensible.” Mara stole one last kiss as he threw his leg over the windowsill.

“Light the candle.” Tham brushed a curl off Mara’s forehead and disappeared into the early morning darkness.

Mara held her breath, waiting for the dull thud of him reaching the ground. A moment later, a figure darted through the shadows. Taking a shuddering breath, Mara fought back the tears that burned in her eyes.

She had chosen this life. There was no going back. It had all been decided years ago.

Her fingers found the compass mark on her left forearm. Too well she remembered the pain of the marking the day she became a map maker’s apprentice. The needle in the mark twisted, pointing due north. A gift of magic to be sure she could always find her way home.

But home always moved when it was a person and not a place.

The first red rays of sun peered up over the sea. Soon, the servants of the Map Master’s Palace would slip through the halls, preparing everything for Lord Karron to wake.

Mara shut the window and finished dressing in a minute, quickly forcing her hair into a braid as she slipped out into the hall.

She was the only one of the map makers to live in Lord Karron’s home. There were no barracks for the map makers as there were for the soldiers. Most of the male map makers were married with families of their own, living in Ilara.

As a female map maker, Mara was a rarity. Marriage and children could never be allowed for her. How could the Guilds endorse a mother abandoning her children to trek on dangerous journeys?

A father could leave, but a mother…

Anger surged through Mara’s chest. Leaning into the shadows of the hall, she pressed the heel of her hand to her heart.

Fair doesn’t matter. It is what it is, and there’s nothing to be done.

The sun peered in through the windows of the long hall, shedding gray light onto the portraits of the long line of Lord Map Makers to have ruled the Guild. They were her lineage―the height to which each map maker strove to ascend.

Pushing herself off the wall, Mara crept down the hall, nodding at the servants as they appeared. She had lived in the palace since she’d become Lord Karron’s ward when she was just a little girl. It was no strange sight for her to be wandering into the family’s wing of the house, past the ornately carved wooden door that led to what had been her room until she’d insisted on being moved.

Allora had fought the change. So had Lord Karron, for that matter. But at least Lord Karron understood. It was one thing for everyone to know she had been raised his ward, another for them to know she ate breakfast with the Lord Map Maker every morning.

Allora had insisted Mara at least stay in the house. So Mara had moved as far away as the palace would allow. Hers was the only room in the guest wing to see regular use. The other bedrooms were only ever occupied when parties were thrown. The seclusion offered her peace and freedom from the bustle of Lord Karron’s home. Her room’s proximity to the orchard made Tham’s coming and going much simpler.

At the end of the family wing, four doors surrounded a grand bay window that looked out over the cliffs and down onto the city of Ilara. Only the far edge of the city was visible from this angle. The rest stayed hidden beneath the height of the cliff.

Ships had already started moving away from the docks, the only sign of life visible from so far above.

Mara closed her eyes, remembering the scent of the sea surrounding her as the wind burrowed through her hair.

The thrill of adventure swirled lightness through her limbs. Then she thought of journeying alone, and dread crashed back into her chest.

Mara turned toward Allora’s door and didn’t bother knocking before swinging it silently open.

The new sun fought valiantly through the curtains, giving just enough light to silhouette Allora sleeping peacefully in her bed. Her blond hair splayed around her, catching the dim bits of light like a dazzling star.

“Allora,” Mara whispered, shutting the door behind her. “Allora.”

“Mara, have you come to wake me before dawn?” Allora mumbled without opening her eyes.

“It’s past dawn.” Mara grinned.

“Still much too early.”

“I need to talk to you.” Mara crept toward the bed.

“Don’t you dare put your filthy boots in my bed, Mara Landil,” Allora groaned, throwing back the covers to make room for Mara.

A giggle escaped Mara as she kicked off her boots and climbed into the warm sheets.

“What’s wrong?” Allora finally opened her eyes.

“Nothing’s wrong. I just wanted to talk.”

“Does it have to do with a brooding soldier and where he’s going to be assigned?” Allora sighed dramatically.

“They could send him anywhere―to the south, or out to sea…” It could be years until she saw Tham again. This time, she didn’t fight the tears that spilled onto Allora’s silk pillows.

“Shh,” Allora hushed, wriggling over to wrap her arms around Mara. “You’ve never been pretty when you cry, and there’s no need for it besides.”

“Allora―”

“Father was still awake when I arrived home last night, waiting up for me as though I were a wayward child. I arranged it all before I let him sleep. You’re going to the white mountains, and Tham will be your personal guard.”

“Allora, thank you!” Mara held her tightly.

“Only

thank you

? No anger at my interference? I thought you might at least be cross about the snow. But father and I agreed it has to be a small expedition and you or Niko would have to be one of the two map makers sent.”

“And Niko’s familiar with the east,” Mara said. “I don’t care where Tham and I go, as long as we’re together.”

“It really wasn’t hard, you know. Father knows about the two of you. Maybe he doesn’t really

know

, but he understands separation would be devastating to you both. And the dear sweet man loves you enough that destroying you would break his kind, old heart.”

Mara laughed, brushing the tears from her cheeks. “I don’t know if I should be appalled your father knows about Tham and me or relieved he isn’t furious.”

“A bit of both, I suppose. It would be so much simpler if you could just marry him.”

“I know.” Pain crept back into Mara’s chest.

“But it’s against Guild laws, and you can’t leave the Guild.” Allora turned toward Mara so their faces were only inches apart, just the way they used to share secrets when they were young. “You and Niko can’t leave the Guild. Father relies on the three of us in ways he can’t trust the rest of the map makers. I don’t know what he’d do if you or Niko abandoned him.”

“Find two other map makers foolish enough to cross the Sorcerers Guild?”

“I don’t think two such fools exist. But as I’m the one who’s stuck here guarding our deadly secrets, I’m sure the three of us will hang nicely together when the day of our execution arrives.”

“Your father will be strung up beside us for letting Niko and me explore such forbidden secrets,” Mara added. “And Tham for helping on the journeys.”

“Kai and Adrial will be a sad sight, alone at our funerals.” Allora smiled. “But our path is set, and we all must follow where it leads.”

“I wouldn’t change it,” Mara said. “Maybe small things, but I wouldn’t change our little clan or the wonders we’ve seen.”

“It would be nice if you could just marry Tham, though,” Allora sighed. “Every time you come creeping into my room, I worry he’s put a child in you. Then I would have to fake some terrible illness that would make it utterly impossible for you to leave my side. We’d have to spend months on end in seclusion to prevent contagion. It’s the only way we could hide you well enough to keep you from being sent to Ian Ayres never to return.”

“Have you truly been plotting to hide me?” Mara laughed.

“I could never let you be sent to that horrible island, illegitimate child or not.” Allora pinched Mara for laughing. “And I wouldn’t let your child be raised on Ian Ayres either. Once the child was born, I would have to announce my early spinsterhood by taking on your secret child as my ward.”

“What?”

“I couldn’t let them take your baby from us,” Allora chided. “It would have to stay with me.”

“Spinsterhood might not be your only option. You could marry Niko and pretend the child is truly yours.”

“A child with dark skin and flaming red hair? I’m sure no one would question the honesty of it.”

“But you could marry him. He really does love you, you know.”

“I do know.” The teasing slipped from Allora’s face. “And it makes saying

no

so much harder.”

“But you love him, too.” Mara squeezed Allora’s hand. “I know you do.”

“It isn’t loving him that’s the problem.” Allora bit her lip, an old trait she used to scold Mara for. “I spent my childhood waiting for my father to come home from his journeys. He’d triumphantly return, tell me wonderful stories of adventure, and abandon me all over again. Then he piled wards into the palace and being left behind wasn’t so dreadful anymore. Father would leave, but at least I had all of you beside me.

“Now we’ve all taken our places in the world, and my place is to stay here. I don’t mind it, really. I know the work I do here is important, even if it would see me hanged. But I’m back to being left behind. I love Niko, more than my heart can stand, but I don’t think I could survive being a wife who’s always waiting. It would break me beyond repair.”

“Oh, Allora.” It was Mara’s turn to hold her friend as silent tears trickled down her cheeks. “I don’t think he’ll ever stop trying to convince you to marry him.”

“Good,” Allora laughed through her tears. “I don’t think I could survive that either.”

“What a sorry clan we are.” Mara wiped Allora’s tears with her sleeve.

“You can’t marry Tham. I won’t marry Niko.”

“Kai loves everyone a little too much. And Adrial―”

“Loves his work,” Allora said. “Think of how many unhappy fools can’t even claim that.”

“We’ll be all right, won’t we?” Mara held tight to Allora’s hand. “The lot of us?”

“Of course we will. We’re Karrons. We’re survivors.”

Previous Chapter
Next Chapter