Chapter Ten
I stare at people as if they were mere shadows in front of me, they pass by and seem to notice that my mind is probably far away. I don't care. The memory of the day before digs its nails into my subconscious and I can't help but think about what I did. I watch Adrien's lips being bitten by his teeth in ecstasy, my mouth full and busy, my mind finding comfort in someone else entirely. God, it felt right but so wrong... I felt the power at hand but at the same time was aware that it should have been directed at someone else. The thought of seeing Adrien in front of me terrified me, my body trembling at his likely reaction and the secret that hovered between us. A part of me loved it, another part rejoiced in this memory, in what I could do and fantasize about, this part feared the reality and its consequences.
The day had been quiet, but there was a lot of work to be done. This time I took precautions when updating the files, but it seemed that no one tried to harm me again. Maybe that was a greeting I hated.
I got up and walked to the elevator without thinking. Next to me were people talking to each other and pretending I didn't exist, constantly bumping their shoulders against mine to get in front of me.
"I think Adrien will provide that. We need an animator at Moser" Adrien? I hadn't expected his name to be mentioned so openly by the staff, especially that woman. I thought that maybe people here create an intimacy that they don't have, or no, maybe they do have some intimacy. I walk quickly to grab a seat in the elevator, and fortunately, thanks to my agility, I succeed, I notice that some people look at me with disgust, but I ignore them as I stretch the wires of my headphones and find myself immersed in the loud music blaring in my ears. "And I love her" - The Beatles are playing and I find myself in mental relaxation, a calm journey after a tiring day.
The elevator descends into the lobby and the people around me rush to get out as quickly as possible. Before I can get out I see a tall silhouette dressed in a suit and tie, I look at his face and those blue eyes stare back at me and I notice that without thinking my steps move to the back of the elevator and I see on his face that he likes my reaction. The doors close and he seriously approaches me. I see myself leaning against the wall, the palms of his hands resting on the wall, his eyes eating me alive and all I can remember is the night before, what he would do was a mystery.
"I want to have dinner with you tonight. Let's go back downstairs." His fingers slide down my cheek and I feel a shiver run down my skin as he slides them to my chin. His touch is gentle, but his eyes seem dull with desire, it was clear. I positively shake my head and he imitates my gesture, a smile on his lips. His kiss made me lean my head against the wall for support and I felt that Adrien was more excited than the night before. I lightly bite his lower lip and run away from his arms as the elevator opens. People enter and I know the adrenaline is pumping through my body. I see him next to me and we both hold back our laughter. I feel his arm touch mine and suddenly I feel relaxed.
We walk side by side and I watch him in a certain way. We walk to his car, but before he can lean over to open the door, I hold his arm. He seems moved by my action, surprised that I would touch him in such a dominant way, and I notice that he is looking away.
"You don't have to take me out to dinner to thank me for yesterday... You rich people don't like to receive, you always want to feel like you have to pay back." I say, my tone true and calm as my fingers gently squeeze his arm.
"I'm not paying you for anything, I got what you gave me." He smiles warmly and I roll my eyes, my lips curling involuntarily. Adrien approaches, no longer holding my hand on his arm. "I want to know you better, I am very curious about you."
"No other woman has ever challenged you, right?" I smile wryly and feel his hands go down my waist, bringing my body close to his. I feel the warmth of his skin, his eyes peering at my lips like a ready target.
"Not like you." He kisses me and I return with the same intensity, our tongues touching and discovering each other perfectly. An icy breeze blows against my hair and the noise of New York City is our background. Nothing seems to force me to do anything but be there.
I allow myself to be in his arms, even though Adrien is not the main target of my desires. Maybe I should give what is offered a chance. I look at his face and touch his chest with both hands and at that moment the man in front of me seems to be good, suddenly I prefer to forget his defects. He releases me quietly and threatens to open the door for me, I hold his hand and he looks at me strangely.
"I can open it." Adrien seems to pause for a moment, then smiles and goes to his side of the car.
I hold the door and my body is ready to enter when that icy breeze envelops me again, I feel empty, as if blown away. Something in the air is calling me and I turn around without thinking, my eyes are looking up, the dark sky in its mysterious blackness is catching my attention, but most of all I am looking at the Moser building in its grandeur and luxury. Everything seems to stop, the noise of cars and people, the bright city fades into nothingness as I see a male silhouette on the top floor, a man whose shadow is dark and blurred and who seems to be exchanging glances with me. I can't see his face because of the distance and the dim lighting, but I can see the strands of his hair slowly dancing in the wind. He's leaning against the balcony, I can't see him, but I know his eyes are giving me an intense and watchful look. He notices that I see him too, but doesn't seem to move, doesn't seem to care. I feel a chill run through my body and all I can think is that this man has witnessed my entire interaction with Adrien, including our kiss. I bet on the possibility that this man is Mr. Moser's boss since he is the only one who frequents the top floor. I see him move, his hands in his pockets, the cold in his movements making me afraid of what will come next. He turns and disappears, leaving only the space where the man was before. I take a deep breath and get into the car, my stomach churning.
Adrien hadn't noticed and I wasn't going to .