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Chapter 3

Xavier’s cries brought me back to reality. I bent down and picked him up in my arms again. I walked out into the lawn where my café was situated. I had remodeled the lawn to create an open café. There was still the ‘closed’ café but people preferred to sit in the open café.

I walked inside to see Harold baking a cake.

“Harold?” I asked and he turned around. A smile adorned his face as he came and greeted me with a kiss on my cheek. Harold was my first employee. He was my chef and over the time he became my manager. He was a great guy who stood by me these four years.

“How is my favorite child doing?” he asked and I laughed.

“He’s sleeping. All he seems to do is cry these days,” I sighed and Harold laughed. “Can I talk to you in private?”

He gave me a strange look. He called one of our other chefs to make the cake and I led him inside the house.

“Is everything okay?” he asked and I just nodded. I braced myself for his reaction as I told him what I was about to do.

“I’m selling the café.”

“What?” he almost shouted. “You’re selling the café? Why”

“I’m moving to London.” I replied and judging by his expression I knew he was going to say something so I continued. “Josh asked me to go with him. And frankly, I would love to. This place has too many bad memories and I cannot handle them. I’m so sorry Harold.”

“I’ll buy it,” Harold announced and I smiled at him gratefully.

“I was hoping you’d say that.” He laughed as he hugged me. My phone rang and I excused myself as I went and answered it.

“Amber Woods.” I answered. I had changed my name back to my maiden name. It was the toughest decision I ever had to make. But I was still Chris’ wife. We still weren’t divorced. Time and again everyone suggested that I start the process and become completely free of ‘the bond’ but I didn’t have it in me.

“What is Josh saying?” I heard Brian ask.

“He’s right. I’m moving to London with him.” I answered bracing myself for the worst yet expecting the best.

“Well, have fun sweetheart. Your mother wants to throw you a farewell party so be here at seven alright?” he asked and I felt tears come to my eyes. They were my parents. Always looking out for me, always being there for me and I loved them for that.

“I be there at the dot.” I said as I cut the call. Checking if Xavier was still asleep I placed him in his cot, rocking him for a minute. The only thing that kept me going after Chris left was Xavier. Chris and I had always agreed that if we ever had a boy we would name him Xavier. And I did just that. Xavier was my only reason for living. He was the only reason I was willing to move to London. I wanted to give him everything without my nightmares. I didn’t want him to be scarred like me. I wanted to give him everything I didn’t get as a child.

I took out his clothes for tonight and dressed into mine. For the first time since Xavier was born I dressed into something I considered remotely pretty. I was wearing an ivory colored dress that stopped about four inches above my knee. I went down to see Xavier playing with the toys on his cot. I changed him too and strapping him into the baby seat I drove to Katie’s house.

“It’s great to see you!” Jen exclaimed and I grinned. As soon as I entered the house Xavier was taken from me and was being passed around.

“I can’t believe your actually moving to London.” Katie said and I sighed.

“Never thought I’d be moving either but" I trailed off and it wouldn’t take a genius to figure out why I was moving. They hugged me and a tear leaked out of my eyes.

“Hey now, no crying,” Katie admonished me in a tone that made me laugh.

“I’ll miss you guys,” I said and this time even Katie cried.

“Okay!” Josh exclaimed. “Stop crying and making everyone cry. I want to raise a toast.”

“This toast is for the most amazing girl I know. Amber you are a strong woman and I know you will conquer even more in London. Especially with me by your side.”

Everyone burst out laughing and I threw a spoon at Josh.

Harold stood up. This time I didn’t look down. I looked at him in surprise. Harold wasn’t really the ‘express my feelings’ kind of guy.

“I want to say thank you Amber.” He started and I save him a small smile, “For giving me a job. And for being there for me. For treating me more like a friend than an employee. For not chucking me out even when her marriage broke because of me-”

I stared at him in disbelief.

“I knew. I always did. And I want to thank you for your faith in me and for letting me run your café. And for letting me buy it. You are the strongest woman I know and I will always treasure what we had.”

I gave Xavier to Jen and walked to him, hugging him. Tears flowed down my face as I hugged him.

“I’ll miss you,” he whispered.

“You too.” I said still hugging him. Harold had been there for me when Chris left. He came home every day, getting me out of bad even when I didn’t want to.

And I was every bit grateful for that. He kept on my feet until Xavier was born. And that’s why he was Xavier’s godfather. After dinner all of us settled in the living room. After some time of mindless chatting Katie piped up.

“Let’s go to the club!”

Instantly everyone started nodding their heads in agreement. I was the only one who was even remotely against this idea. So there were four people-Katie, Josh, Jen and Brock against me.

“No,” I pleaded and all of them shook their heads at me.

I groaned using my trump card. “What about Xavier?”

“Mom can take care of him.” Katie said and then turned to Cassie. “Won’t you mum?”

“Yes sweetheart. Go let your hair down for a night. I will take care of your little boy.”

I instantly felt guilty. I was sure of her mothering abilities. What I was not sure of was my partying abilities. I was pretty sure I would be drunk after two glasses of wine.

“Fine. I’ll go,” I said raising my hands in the universal sign for surrender.

Katie grinned and Jen squealed. They were such kids! But I would nonetheless miss them.

“Five shots please,” Katie said to the bartender.

“Actually… I’ll have a martini.” I said in a quiet voice and Katie raised her eyebrows at me.

“Four shots and a martini then,” she improvised. We got our drinks and slipped into our seats. We were at the hottest and most high profile club in the city. Courtesy- Josh Burns. We had a close enough to the bar yet it was far off so were kind of hidden. I was totally drunk after four martinis.

“Let’s dance!!” I exclaimed but my voice slurred a little bit. Without waiting for anyone to reply I went to the dance floor and started dancing. I put my hands above my head and started dancing.

one hour later

“Let’s get laid!!” I exclaimed and I heard Katie groan.

“Bringing you here was a bad idea,” she muttered.

“I can’t stay celibate all my life.” I said and she glared at me. I felt hands on my waist and I started grinding against the guy. A squeal escaped my lips as I found myself being lifted and thrown across his shoulder.

As we moved out of the club I shouted, “Put me down Chris!!”

Silence. I was greeted with silence. And shock. They looked at me in disbelief. I felt myself being put down and I looked up to see Josh. Oh. Josh.

Tears flowed down my face. “Why did Chris leave me? Was I not good enough for him?”

“Let’s get you home Amber,” Jen said gently.

“Home?” I almost scoffed. “Yeah right. That place is suffocating. I hate it! I hate him!”

“Come on Amber,” Josh said and he gently tugged my arm.

“You know, it’s funny,” I started and Josh looked at me questioningly. “Everyone I ever love leaves me. Mom, dad and now Chris. Are you going to leave me too Josh?”

“No.” there was certainty in his voice. And anger.

“Maybe Xavier will leave me too" I mused.

“He will not okay?” Josh snapped. “If he does I’ll cut both his legs off and bring him right back to you.”

I laughed. When we got home Josh put me to bed and kissed my forehead.

“Goodnight Amber.” He said as he was about to walk out.

“Aren’t you going to call me princess? You did last time you rescued me from the club.” I said.

He turned around with a small, sad smile on his lips.

“Goodnight princess.”

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