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Chapter 01 Ariele

I woke up to the sound of the doorbell ringing outside, signaling that it's time for me to start my day. I quickly get out of bed, get dressed, and go through my morning hygiene routine. I pause for a moment in front of the small mirror hanging on the wall and take a deep breath. I remind myself that today will be like any other day, I do what I need to do, and try not to draw attention to myself.

I head to the Hararium for the mass. Father Jorell has always been kind and presents his sermons with enthusiasm and grace. However, Mother Dalila is very strict, often using harsh words and punishments - if necessary - to enforce her will. When the mass ends, I feel immense pressure, knowing that she is watching me closely.

I leave the Hararium with a sense of relief, thinking about how much longer I can endure this lifestyle.

I love the children here with all my heart and feel that being a nun is truly my calling.

They are so innocent and vulnerable, and I feel it's my responsibility to care for them in the best way possible.

I spend most of my time playing, teaching, and taking care of the children. I love to see their smiles and hear their laughter, and I feel immense satisfaction in helping them grow and develop.

Sometimes, the children can be difficult or challenging, but I never give up on them. I believe that each of them has incredible potential and I want to help them fulfill it.

Furthermore, I feel that being a nun is my true calling. Since joining the religious order, I have felt a deep inner peace and joy. I feel like I am fulfilling the purpose for which I was created and making a difference in the lives of these children.

Although there are days when tasks can be tiring or difficult, I never lose motivation or passion for what I do. Being a nun and caring for these children is what makes me feel fulfilled and happy.

Being an orphan is one of the hardest things I have experienced in life. Not knowing anything about my parents is a constant ache that accompanies me every day. I miss having someone to guide me and help me make important decisions in life. I don't think I'll ever overcome the fact that I don't have a family to call my own.

The ring I have is the only memento I have of my parents and it's very special to me. I keep it carefully and always wear it as a way to feel connected to them. Sometimes, I catch myself staring at it for hours, imagining what my parents were like, what they enjoyed doing, how they looked at me when I was a baby.

Being an orphan is a lonely and painful experience, but I try to find comfort in the things around me. I focus on the friends I've made and my own inner strength to move forward. Still, the longing for my parents and the feeling of not belonging anywhere is something that never completely fades away.

Even though I have liked and lived here for as long as I can remember, it's very difficult to deal with the cruel and inhumane treatment I receive from Mother every day. She is relentless in her criticisms and punishments, always finding a reason to reprimand or humiliate me. It's as if I can never do anything right in her eyes, and it makes me feel small and worthless.

However, having Sister Lurdez around makes a big difference in my life. She is kind, attentive, and always willing to listen and comfort me. When I'm feeling really bad about Mother's harsh words, I can rely on Sister Lurdez to embrace me and remind me that I'm not a bad person, even if Mother tries to convince me otherwise.

Sister Lurdez is a true angel in my life, and her presence gives me the strength to face the challenges of everyday life. I am very grateful to have her as my friend and confidante, and I hope to repay her kindness in some way in the future.

When my break time comes, I notice that Lucinha, one of the girls from the orphanage, looks downcast.

"Hi, dear! How are you feeling today?"

"Hi, Arielle! I'm feeling a bit sad today."

"Oh, I'm sorry to hear that. What's making you sad"

"I miss my mom. She left a long time ago and never came back."

"I understand how you feel. It's tough when the people we love are gone. But remember, you have many people here at the orphanage who love you and take care of you. And even though your mom isn't here physically, she still loves you very much."

"I know, Arielle, but I really wish I could see her again."

"I understand, but you know what we can do? We can write a letter to your mom, telling her how much you love her and miss her. And maybe she can read the letter at some point and know how much you still think of her."

"That's a good idea, Arielle! I'd like to do that."

"Great! Let's get some paper and a pen and write together. And don't worry, I'm here to support you in whatever you need."

There are days when it seems that everything I do is not enough to make their lives better. As someone who spent many years in this institution, I know what it's like to grow up without a family to call your own. It's tough to be strong for them, but I try in every possible way.

For a long time, I wished to be adopted. I eagerly hoped for a family to love me and accept me as I am. Unfortunately, nothing happened and I eventually gave up. Over time, I came to terms with the idea that maybe I would never have a family to call my own.

Because of that, I developed a strong empathy for the children who have been here for a long time and who, like me, haven't been adopted yet. It's tough to see the light in their eyes diminish every day, but I try my best to make them feel loved and valued. It's important to me that they know there are people who care about them and are willing to help them overcome any obstacle.

Finally, I want to say that despite all the difficulties, I don't regret choosing to stay here after I came of age. Seeing the children's smiles and knowing I can make a difference in their lives is one of the greatest rewards I can receive. I know it's not easy, but I will continue to fight for these children and give them the best I can offer.

After teaching the orphanage children, I return to my dormitory exhausted but also satisfied that I've managed to teach something new to those little angels. As usual, I head straight to the bathroom for a warm and relaxing shower, which will help alleviate the day's fatigue.

The room isn't very luxurious, but I don't mind, because I know I'm there for a good cause. There's only a small mirror on the wall, barely enough to see my face in full, but it's sufficient for me to tidy up.

After getting ready, I head to the communal dining area where all the orphanage residents gather to eat together. The smell of homemade food fills my nostrils, making me even hungrier than I already am.

While waiting in line to get my portion of food, I observe the children having fun and chatting with each other. It's amazing to see how they manage to be happy even amidst so many difficulties.

Finally, it's my turn to get my food, consisting of rice, beans, chicken, and salad. I sit at one of the tables with other volunteers and future nuns from the orphanage, and we start chatting about how our day has been and what we can do to improve the children's lives.

It's a pleasant and comforting evening, and I feel very happy to be part of that community.

I was walking towards my room when I heard raised voices coming from the courtyard of the convent. I decided to approach and see what was happening, and I saw Mother trying to reason with a man with his back to me. I got curious and moved closer, until the man turned towards me.

At that moment, my heart raced and the ground seemed to disappear from under my feet. His dark eyes were mesmerizing, and I felt enchanted by them. He was dressed in black attire that accentuated his beauty even more, and his face was perfect, as if sculpted by a skilled artist.

I couldn't take my eyes off his, and for a moment, I forgot where I was and what was happening around me. It was as if we were in a world of our own, as if nothing else mattered but those black eyes, like the night, looking back at me.

I was speechless for a few moments, until I finally managed to mumble some words. But still, I felt spellbound by his presence and his eyes that seemed to pierce through my soul.

I felt extremely uncomfortable in that situation, never before had I been so close to a man so strong and virile like him. My eyes couldn't avoid making eye contact with him, even though his presence deeply intimidated me. I was used to the safety of the convent and the company of the sisters, and that man seemed to be in a completely different world from mine.

No matter how hard I tried to resist his gaze, I felt like he could see right through me, as if he could read all my thoughts. It was as if he knew all my insecurities and fears, which made me even more vulnerable.

Despite everything, I knew that man wasn't like any other I had encountered in life. He had a different aura, something that attracted and scared me at the same time. It was as if I could sense power and masculinity radiating from him, leaving me confused and nervous.

I had never experienced something like this before, and that feeling made me question everything I thought I knew about life outside the convent. I knew I couldn't stay there for much longer, but at the same time, I didn't want to stop looking at him, feeling hypnotized by his penetrating and mysterious gaze.

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