CHAPTER ONE: Hate

Carina's POV

Onions made me cry, and I hated it because each time I cried, I remembered my first love, Anderson, the only person I would ever love.

I squeezed the knife in my hand tighter, shutting my eyes to stop the tears that attempted to spill out.

Anderson did not deserve what happened to him! If it had not been for his wicked and cruel team members. Crap! I could not hold in the tears anymore. They just poured out of my eyes without my permission.

It had been weeks now since he died, and I was not even close to getting over him. Who was I kidding anyway? How was I supposed to get over the one I finally loved in just a few weeks? Could anyone who was deeply in love with someone get over them in just a few weeks? I think that is impossible unless he or she was never in love. But every one of my kind expected me to get over him because they said he was 'weak'.

'Weak'. That word makes me want to puke every time. How could they be so ruthless? Anderson was only a slow learner, and I strongly believed he could have gotten stronger with time if only his teammates had let him. I hate them, all of them. I hated them so very much.

I threw the knife with so much force against the wall and screamed. I am pretty sure my screams sounded more like howling because my true form attempted to surface, but I did not care. Life was pretty unfair to me.

"Carina, Carina, please keep your voice down before someone knows I am housing a", Bella said, running to be before whispering the word "werewolf".

I owed Bella a whole lot for accepting me the way I was, even when my kind rejected me. Why was I calling them my kind when they were not? In fact, before they had the chance to reject me fully, I had left the city for another city occupied mostly by humans. I did not just leave by walking away from the city; I had gone wild the day I learned the truth about my identity and my lover's death. When I ran wild, I left for another city and hid myself, but I was rescued by Bella, who happened to be a very kind human and chose to accept me for who I was, even if my true self was a werewolf, a creature detested by many humans.

Sincerely, I was sorry for Bella because each time I remembered Anderson, I had the tendency to go wild and damage her properties, causing her so much stress, but she did not get tired of me. I was grateful to have her in my life because she was better than those alphas and betas who were ready to reject me and throw me out of Vinillus, a city meant for werewolves in Europe. They were ready to treat me like dirt just because I was an Omega and the daughter of a human shapeshifter who was able to transform into a wolf. That was all my mother's fault because if she had not lied about my identity, I would not have been separated from Anderson, and he would not have been left to die on the battlefield that night. But she chose to lie. I hated her.

"Please stop crying, Carina, please", Bella pleaded, hugging me while I soaked her shirt in my tears. I cried even louder after she begged me not to. She was a good friend, but I did not think it was possible for anyone to fill up the space Anderson had once filled. No one was capable of living with me like he did.

'Would he have loved you if he knew you were an Omega?', a tiny voice said in my head, but I shut it up. He loved me, which is what mattered, but now he was gone and no one would love me anymore, not now that everyone knew I was not the daughter of Baldar, one of the strongest alphas who had fallen in love with my mother, thinking she was a Luna, or a female alpha, as some liked to call it. But when he found out her true nature, he immediately hated her. Sometimes I thought that he did not even love her from the start because how else did he manage to detest my mother as though she was a pig when he learned the truth? But then, that was how most alphas were: arrogant and full of themselves. I was a fool to have thought he was going to be different.

As though his bad treatment of my mom was not enough, he extended the bad treatment to me as well, and the other werewolves started treating me badly. Then the same day, I heard about Anderson's death in the saddest way possible. I was even laughed at. He was forced to go to war against some other bad werewolves by other betas, but when he was attacked and could not fight the werewolves alone, his teammates, who had hated him from the start, refused to save him. They let him die because they wanted him dead. They knew he was not fit for war, but they made him go anyway.

I sniffled. My cry was of no use. I had lost the only man I had ever been attracted to and I would never get him back. I would never be attracted to any other werewolf in my life; I promised myself that. It was not going to be hard anyway; I was not the Luna that everyone expected me to be, so I was not obligated to fall in love with an alpha, and I was not a beta, so I was not obligated to fall in love with a beta. I was an outcast trying to fit in with humans, and I was not sure I was capable of having feelings for a human.