CHAPTER 01. Déjà Vu,
— VITA.
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Have you ever had the feeling of déjà vu… the feeling that everything has already happened?
I’m sitting in this garden, my eyes fixed on something, but I’m not really looking at it. The voices around me are muffled and confused. I don’t hear them, not really... they sound just like meaningless noises.
Something strange seems to surround me, a sense of foreboding that overwhelms and makes me hold my breath, almost as if the pure air that surrounds me is nothing but poison...
“Vita?” Derek’s soft voice catches my eyes, and I just wake up. I force a smile, feeling uneasy. “Are you all right?”
“Yes.” I reach for a glass of water, but he’s quicker to pick it up and bring it to me. “Thanks...”
“Is it too hot for you here outside?” His big hand reaches for my hair and pushes it behind my shoulder, showing off my neck and the usual delicate gold necklace I received when our engagement was announced. On my finger is also the engagement ring, passed down through the generations. This ring belonged to his mother and, before that, his grandmother. Whenever a Luna is chosen for the new Alpha, that ring finds a new owner as well.
But not this necklace... That was chosen by Derek and no one else.
Derek approaches me, and inevitably, I find myself admiring his square and smooth chin without any beard on it; his eyelashes are also long, and his eyebrows give him a penetrating look, even though there is nothing but sweetness in his blue eyes. He smiles at me and places a kiss on my cheek, dangerously close to my lips, and I find myself smiling like a fool.
“What do you say we get out of here?” Derek says quietly against my ear. “We can sneak up to my room.”
I feel my cheeks burn at his suggestion, and a shiver spreads through my body, “We can't do that; it's your sister's birthday.”
"Ten minutes, people won't miss us-"
"Hey, you two, get a room!" Wanda, my step-sister, says with a laugh on her lips, giving me a discreet bump. "Auntie's watching everything, you know."
I glance at Wanda, catching a glimpse of her brown eyes and black hair. Although we don't share the same blood, I can see some similarities between us, which is really curious...
"By the way, you dressed too modestly... I said you should have put on that golden dress! Auntie is judging just by looking at you." She says quietly, closer. "I know it's Alice's party, but you're Alpha's fiancée; you can show off, sis!"
I ignore Wanda's comments because I'm not like her. I don't like drawing attention to my body. Of course, I'm not ugly; I know that. My black hair may be commonplace around here, but my hazel eyes are mesmerizing — as Derek would say whenever he touches my face and looks directly into them as if he could see my soul.
Then I spy the Queen Mother and notice that she really is looking down on me.
Honestly, I don't know why she doesn't like me. My engagement to Derek was announced two years ago, and she doesn't make a point of being nice. In fact, she never liked me, even before our families arranged our engagement.
I confess, it's really painful to be mistreated like this, especially since I'm hoping that one day she'll accept me. After all, although our engagement is a deal between our families, Derek and I really do love each other and chose each other; there would be no matter in this bond if it weren't so.
Well, at least she tolerates me for being a Virginia. I know that my noble blood is the reason she accepted this relationship and tolerates me, but it saddens me to know that for her, I carry the importance of just flesh and blood, and not as Vita, the person I am. If my grandfather hadn't fought alongside Derek's grandfather in the great war that united all races to consolidate this country into what it is today, would Derek's mother have accepted me? Well, of course not.
At least, it doesn't really matter. Derek is the Alpha of the Black Pack now, the representative of the werewolves in these lands. If he's chosen me and wants to be by his side, I'm happy and will do my best to become his Luna, even if the whole world is against us.
"Vita?" Derek calls me softly and touches my face, pulling it to look at him, smiling when my eyes land on his again. "What are you looking at? I may be jealous if you do that.”
I open my lips to answer him, but I'm interrupted. In fact, all conversation ceases immediately and the eyes immediately turn to the garden door of the Imperial Mansion, where a big party is being thrown to celebrate the princess’s coming of age.
“Look... the birthday girl is here,” Derek says quietly, and gives me a smile.
People stand up, and I try to do the same, but my legs feel shaky. Perhaps it is too hot for me. Fortunately, Derek holds me gently by the waist, helping me to stand up. From a distance, my gaze meets that of the Queen Mother, who looks at me with disdain, but I simply ignore it and look at Alice, the most beautiful girl I’ve ever seen.
She’s wearing a white midi dress, so delicate that it makes her look like a doll. Her blonde hair, tied up in a braid, adds even more beauty to her round face. She really looks beautiful today.
When Alice’s blue eyes fall on me, her smile gets even bigger. She detaches herself from the butler’s arm and runs towards me. People around us look disapprovingly, but she doesn’t care... she just opens her arms and holds me, giving me one of the warmest hugs I’ve ever received.
I hear Derek’s low laugh, and he puts his hand on the top of her head, messing up the hairstyle that I’m sure took a long time to make. “How can you run into Vita’s arms instead of hugging your own brother?”
She snorts but doesn’t let go. And I simply surrender, hugging her back, giving a sweet smile to Derek, who pretends to be offended.
“But of course, Vita is the most important person to me. She’s my big sister.”
“No, she’s my fiancée — now get your hands off Vita,” Derek says with a laugh, pulling Alice’s head back, making the three of us laugh.
“How inappropriate, Alice.” The Queen Mother appears behind her, holding a fan that quickly closes in her hand, a small snap that makes me flinch. “You’re the Alpha’s sister; you can’t behave like that... especially with someone... like Vita.”
Derek grits his teeth and retracts his hand, this time putting it around my shoulders. I know he’s trying to protect me, even though he can’t say anything that would embarrass his mother in public... But honestly, knowing that he’s by my side like this is enough and really brings warmth to my chest.
“Let Alice enjoy it, Mother. It’s her eighteenth birthday party, after all.”
Alice gives Derek a big smile and lets go of me but stops next to my side. She also faces her mother, surely trying to control her bold tongue that always says the wrong thing. Alice is in constant trouble for behaving inappropriately, but at least she’s trying.
“Today is the day she needs to behave most, Derek. There are a lot of important people here; you shouldn’t encourage such vulgar behavior... not for your sister, not for your fiancée.” Queen Mother spits out these words, almost as if they were bitter. And once again, she looks at me with contempt, as if I were the most disgusting creature on the face of the earth.
“Why don’t you take care of these matters for me, Mother?” Alice retorts, unable to keep quiet. She clicks her tongue, making Queen Mother’s face twist. “I’ll come soon, I promise.”
With a frown, the woman snorts and grumbles, opening her fan again to cool herself. “I’ll give you ten minutes... I want to find a candidate to be your fiancé today.”
I notice that Alice’s shoulders slump, and she just nods as the Queen Mother walks away. Her expression is now of pure sorrow, and there’s no sign of her usual smile. It’s like she’s a flower that withers, dries up, dies.
“Don’t provoke our mother, Alice,” Derek says firmly, stroking my hair in a simple gesture. “Don’t make your day more difficult.”
“Why don’t you pay attention to your buddies? Out of all of us, you’re the most expected person, Alpha.”
“It’s big brother for you.” He flicks her forehead, making Alice grumble, and covers her face, feigning pain. “But you’re right, I have to go.”
Derek turns to me, putting his hand on my cheek, and I snuggle into his warm touch, his big hand fitting perfectly and his finger stroking my cheek slowly. “Are you going to be okay on your own?”
“Wanda’s just over there, I won’t be alone.” I give him a shy smile and look directly into his blue eyes, which, like Alice’s, seem to hold a universe inside them, a million twinkling stars looking back at me.
“Okay.” He leans in, brushing our lips and mixing our breaths. “I’ll be right back.”
“Okay,” I repeat, nodding. When I feel a light kiss, my mouth just opens, and Derek smiles against my lips, licking it before sliding his tongue...
“Argh, I’m still here!” Alice complains, covering her eyes as this is the most horrific scene she’s ever witnessed.
I laugh, and so does Derek, sealing our farewell with a light, simple kiss that makes me want more. But then he leaves, his broad back moving further and further away.
Once again, I feel a bad feeling... such anguish, a fear that maybe this is the last time we’ll be so close together...
“Vita, I want to ask you something,” Alice says suddenly, taking my hands in hers, interrupting my thoughts that were taking confusing paths again. I look at her angelic face, her eyes shining with anticipation. “Something that only you can do.”
“And what would that be?” I give her a sweet smile, letting her hold my hands.
“Today is my birthday, but I won’t be able to celebrate the way I’d really like to, like a normal person.”
“You are Alpha’s sister, after all.” My gaze softens because I know how trapped and suffocated Alice feels for simply being born as the princess, being Derek’s sister, and having such a controlling mother. I really sympathize with Alice, perhaps because she’s one of the only people I have left. Her love, her friendship, her care... She means the world to me.
“Exactly, I can’t do it alone.” She raises her eyebrows, her gaze becoming bold. “But if you’re with me... it’s possible.”
I shudder, and before I can refuse, she adds, “I want to celebrate like a normal person, drinking for the first time in some busy and regular bar in the city.”
“Alice...”
“Come with me, let me breathe out of this suffocation... I really can’t rely on anyone but you, Vita... Please, help me.”
Alice’s words stuns me, and her hands, steady as her eyes, make me hold my breath.
“Please, Vita... I want to feel alive.”
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... Oh, once again... I'm getting a bloody Déjà Vu.