You are nobody without me

David jumps out of the back seat and pulls a handful of cash from the front pocket of his jeans. He throws the money out the driver's side window and trots over to me.

"Baby"

He pleads, running his fingers through his dark blond hair.

"Don't do this. I love you"

I spin on my heels, knowing full well that if he shows me those youthful dimples, I'll give in. His hand wraps around my elbow and energy shudders through me as he spins me around with surprising force. Under his grip my elbow hurts.

"You're hurting me"

I growl through my teeth so the neighbors can't hear.

He doesn't release his grip. His eyes bore into mine as he moves closer so I can feel and smell his hot, alcohol-filled breath on my face. There is no sympathy on his face, only anger. I look into his small blue eyes and then down his face to his thin lips. The pink lipstick along her jaw line catches my eye. My gaze follows the sets of lips down his neck, before disappearing under the blue collar of his green polo shirt.

"You're disgusting"

I spit.

He squeezes my arm tighter and I wince as my muscle compresses hard under my flesh.

"What would you do without me? Where would you be without me? You're nothing without me. You know that"

I pull my arm away.

"I don't need you anymore. I need someone who appreciates me"

David bursts out laughing, throwing his head back and exposing his teeth. Apparently, I told the joke of the year.

"You won't find anyone who's as interested in you as I am. You're plain, Sandra, and you're boring. You have nothing to offer anyone. I'm the best thing that ever happened to you"

Ha, to think that this bitter person is supposed to be my partner. A strange tingling sensation builds up in my throat as it usually does before crying and I press my tongue against the roof of my mouth to help ease the buildup of tears. And it does to some extent.

"If I'm so bad, why are you so upset?"

I ask, my voice shaking slightly.

"I'm not angry. I'm happy. Break up with me, I don't care. You'll come crawling back and when you do I'll slam the door in your face"

I walk away from him. If I don't leave now, I'll cry and I don't want him to see me cry. I walk up the little white stairs and just before I enter my apartment his voice screams at me one last time.

"I don't need you! L.A. is full of better girls and I picked up two of them tonight!"

I close the door and slide down the hardwood. How can someone who used to be so sweet be so damn hurtful? If you had asked me a few years ago where I wanted to be in life, I would have said 'anywhere as long as I have David'. If you asked me the same question now, I would answer 'anywhere where I don't see David's stupid face or hear his stupid voice'. My chest heaves painfully as tears escape my eyes. I let them fall full force because I've been holding them back since the restaurant and I can't anymore. I crawl on hands and knees from the front door, through the living room and into my bedroom. I manage to climb into bed and let the cool satin duvet cover caress my burning cheeks. After a few minutes I realize I'm not crying because I broke up with David. I'm crying because I know this isn't the end. He will keep coming back. He will keep emotionally blackmailing me and belittling me until I break down and accept him back into my life, but that's not going to happen this time. I won't take him back. I am stronger now and have been preparing for our inevitable breakup for a long time. The fact that I choose to wear more conservative clothes doesn't make me plain and the fact that I like to stay home most nights and read and write doesn't make me boring. I will show him that I am not dependent on him. I will show him that I can't control myself. I'll treat him like I'm over it because I'm definitely getting over being treated like I'm nothing.

Fuck him.