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4- Theon

After I had woken as a vampire, I had tried my hardest to ignore the loneliness that seemed to cause chaos erupting inside me, feeding on the parts of me that I had left, that were still at the very least, alive but when I couldn't fight it any longer, I found myself delving into the art of what I was, readily leaving behind my past as no one seemed to care for it.

Focusing on the present.

I suppose that while my kind spent most of their life feeding and losing control before getting killed by the hunters that ravaged our kind mercilessly, I spent mine trying to understand what I was. Did I still have a soul? Could I find a way to study more about blood? What can I do to make the sun stop hurting? How long can I sleep without blood?

Perhaps, my resolve in trying to make a new life for myself by every means necessary because I wanted to feel something for once in my life is what kept me alive all this years as many of my kind died from my time ages ago but I never did care for humans. I felt not a single attachment towards them. Neither hate, nor a sense of loyalty. Nothing. Plus, they were all the same. Simple-minded and cruel. Even with all they had, they managed to wreak havoc into the world little by little.

The one thing that I liked, was science. Things that evolved, that changed. That... Grew. It was as if understanding the sort of person I was made the fear that I was unlovable and isolated go away. Or at the very least, stay silent.

It is why my kind believed that they had all it took to overthrow the humans, because of the notes and discoveries I had made in a hope of making my life at the very least bearable. Did I stop them? No. I couldn't care for humans, and truly, I did enjoy seeing them need me. Crave my power and my knowledge, but even after all of it, they had made hierachies which our kind decided to abide to.

Level A, were the Ancients. I, for example, is supposed to be in it. My knowledge and versatility at living for as long as I have qualifies me for this position but I am not interested in revealing my secrets anytime soon and it is a boring rank. Just sitting in my throne room with nothing to do. I detested it.

Level B were the Royal Bloodlines. During our siege, the others had decided to feed a little of their blood to their most devout and loyal underlings which by doing so gave them an edge over the others. They rule and people obey them because they fought the war that gave them ownership of the world they lived in while the Ancients make them do their will.

There are three more levels. Levels C, D and E, and I fall under C. Of course, the Ancients didn't like this at first. Perhaps they feared what I would do so far away from their sights but when they realized that I truly felt nothing for humans so would not have a reason to betray them, they left me in my office and lab to do my researches in peace.

How wrong could they have been.

For the first time in millenniums, my office feels small, tight. And Old. I have remodeled it many times to suit my taste with the years that passed and a day ago, I liked it, now I do not. It feels restrictive, lacking... A wildness to it.

Like her, for example.

I can't stop wondering what she would do if I give her the power to change it. Even with all I know, I can't predict what colours she would use, or what she would get rid of. It is strange, isn't it? I have gone through every document of hers and her private life. There is nothing there, nothing to catch my attention.

Nothing to explain why I crave her so heavily.

Letting out a sigh, I lean back into my chair then stare at my watch. I couldn't help how I hope she gets into trouble so I have an excuse to see her again, or smell her at the very least but I'm grateful that it doesn't happen. The last thing I need is for their eyes to find her. They'll take her away or worse, use her as a bargaining tool.

And I might not know her perfectly but one thing I do know is they wouldn't just find her blood interesting but her alone. And I do not wish to share.

My head snaps to my door as someone walks in, the sounds of their heels clicking on the tiles of my office irritating, but she knows it and she refuses to stop. Still, I smile and placing my elbows on the table, I clasp my hands together, and rest my chin on them, saying softly, "This is strange. I hope I'm not in trouble."

Isolde Hart flashes a dimpled smile at me, her strawberry red lips curling softly as she reaches the chair in front of me and sits in front of me, placing her purse gently on the table in front of me. She has on an off-the-shoulder, adorned with delicate lacedeep midnight blue flowing silk chiffon reminiscent of the night sky, with a subtle shimmer. It has am A-line silhouette, cinched at the waist with a silk sash, accentuating the wearer's curves while intricate beadwork and sequins form celestial patterns, evoking a sense of starlight against the dark backdrop.

Her hair is as black as the night in a bob, with ends of it curled and parted to the side, covering the scar she has on her left face and as she stares at me, her amber iris glows. She is enjoying this. I can tell. "As much as I would enjoy that, can I not come see the male who proved to me that even as an undead, I still have a heart that can bleed?"

At the very beginning of our resurgence, the Ancients still didn't trust me, especially since I refused vehemently to join them or tell them the secrets I know. So they had turned Isolde Hart and put her in the same sect as I, hoping that I would fall for her and tell her everything I was hiding.

We fucked many times, countless in fact, and eventually, she had fallen for me and told me what she was sent to do, hoping I would forgive and love her in return for her betraying her true Sires for me.

I had not known all of this before but I told her that love between vampires was almost laughable. We lived far too long to tie ourselves to anyone. Plus, I knew I would kill her if I did try to keep her by my side to long as I would find her disturbing. She didn't believe me until I put a branding iron to her face. She ran back to them and stayed away from me ever since.

Until now.

"What is it?" I ask, flashing a smile on my face. "Clearly, you're not that desperate for me fucking you again after what happened last time, are you?"

Her eye flashes briefly, like a flame that just had fuel poured over it but eventually, it douses out and she smiles, "You have been out of their radar for an entire day. They're curious to what changed your schedule."

I raise my eyebrow. I'm not surprised that they're keeping track of my every move but them being open about it is surprising. "Did they send you all this way to tell me something so silly? Surely, they all know I have a life away from my office."

"Everyone knows you do not, especially me. Did you forget I was with you for a century?" She says this like it matters. A century is a day for us. Why did she even bring it up? Would she rather I rip out her other eye before she hates me? "And no, they didn't send me. I came myself. To warn you."

I smile. "You really are such a devoted puppy. What is it that makes you keep coming back? The degradation and humiliation I put you through or my cock? You can be honest. I do not kink shame."

She lets out an hiss. "I'm serious. Just because they don't know doesn't mean that they'll not find—"

"They should try gardening. It is truly therapeutic. I have a cactus that I have managed to keep for two years. I suppose it hasn't died because it's easy to keep but—"

"Theon—"

I don't let the rest of the words leave her lips as my eyes flash to their true colour and I fix them on her. Immediately, she's bending her head down, letting out small grunts of pain. I stare at her for the first few seconds, enjoying her silence but after a while, I let out a sigh and rest back on my chair.

She lets out a gasp as she looks up now. There is blood trailing out of her nose but there are tears gathering in her good eye. She should attack me, fight back, but she doesn't. Instead, her eye stares with confusion and hurt. Briefly, I wonder what will happen if I do the same with Solaris.

I feel a surge of electricity flow through me now.

Carefully, I lean back towards her and reach for her face. She flinches at first but she let's me push away the hair on the burnt side of my face and I stare at it. Her right eye is white, and there's a V over it.

I caress it, rubbing my thigh over it before saying gently, "You are truly a child and I pity you for it. They raised you for the sole purpose of knowing me so completely that you fell in love with me. I don't blame you for it, but you must understand. Vampires do not fall in love. So what you feel is nothing less than you obeying the orders your Masters gave you."

My words are lies intermingling with truth but she doesn't know that. She's truly young, and lost. I suppose the only way she would ever truly let go of me is after her death. And I wish to kill her, but I do not. Not now. She is still useful

Instead, I retract my hand from her face and move away, saying again with a smile on my face. "Tell me everything that happens, do you understand? And try to be more... Careful. I don't want you dead yet."

As long as she tells me what they do, I will make sure that Solaris is kept a secret. She is the only thing that makes the chaos in me pause and try it's hardest to figure out what the outcome might be. She is science in real life. And I do not plan on letting her out of my sight yet.

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