Chapter 8
Tara's pov
Nanny Dorothy's face fell as I spat out that I might still be in love with Carlos. She looked at me in bewilderment, and then furrowed her gaze at me, giving me a disapproving look. She pursed her lips together then shook her head in disapproval.
“I don't understand. '' Her voice tinged with disappointment, I knew she was rooting for Andrew and I to be together.
“You should move on, from what Andrew told me.
He's not a very nice man.” She added. Even without her telling me anything, I could see the hurt in her eyes as she spoke. My heart aches, my heart was the one at fault. I think I loved him so much that even after our divorce, I still haven't gotten over him.
“I know this is not what you wanted,” I said softly, as I looked at her.
Nanny Dorothy's face softened, she reached out for my hand giving it a gentle squeeze,
”I just want you to be happy.” her gentle voice says to me, she pauses the sighs,
“But if you're still in love with him, I'll be here to guide you.” She paused, looked at me then said,
“Tell me, is this what you want?” At this point, I paused as her question sank in.
Do I want to be with Carlos? I just have to be sure about this. Even if I do, Carlos was a no-go area.
I sighed, “I just can't stop thinking about him,” I said with a shaky voice.
Nanny Dorothy then smiled as she looked at me, her lips curling into a sad smile.
“You know most times love is not enough to want to be with someone.” She says, “ Even for him to lose you back, love is never enough.” I felt a sting of pain in my chest as she said the truth
.
“It is not enough to make any marriage or relationship work.”
She was right, but it was easier said than done, my mind drifted to the number of times I had tried to move on but failed miserably.
“I know …” I said with my voice breaking.
Dorothy's eyes welled up with tears, and she immediately pulled me into a warm hug, like she knew exactly what I wanted.
She pats me gently,
“I know it's hard but it's going to be fine.” Her voice clouded in emotion.
“With time you'll get better “ she began,” you find someone who would make your heart giggle at the slightest thing that you'll forget all about your ex-husband.” I cling tightly to her, as I let her words sink into me...She was right, all I needed was time but with the truth, I was still at a loss.
Dorothy pulled off and held my small face in her hands,
“What you're feeling….it's real and it's normal.” She says, “It's okay to grieve and it's also okay to be sad but you have to fight it for you to move on.
You're still very much young and have a whole life ahead of you to figure out.” I took a deep breath and then nodded. Maybe it was time to move in and be happy. I smiled and then hugged her.
“Thank you, Nanny,” I said she patted my back and then said to me.
“Now come down for lunch” with a warm smile.”
“I asked Andrew and he said your favorite is chicken noodle soup and garlic bread?” I nodded with excitement.
“Well, I made exactly that for you.”.
“You will need all the strength both in your stomach and in your heart.” She teased, making me laugh.
“Thank you, “ I said as she stood up,
“You're always welcome, my darling.” she then walked out of my room leaving me to my thoughts.
I then stood up from the bed and walked towards my dresser, I opened the middle drawer and searched through for my dress, I was distracted by a small thud, and looked down to see a small photo album.
I grazed my hand over the small picture feeling a mix of sadness and nostalgia. I turned the page and began to look through the rest of the photos.
I tossed it back into the drawer then went downstairs. As soon as I reached the stairs the sweet smelling sarvor hit my stomach, it groaned with excitement.
I could smell the scent of fresh-cooked food, wafting in the kitchen. I followed my nose and saw Nanny Dorothy bustling around, preparing the meal.
The table was set, and everything looked perfect.
“Hey there,” she raised her glance at me as I walked into the kitchen.
“Lunch is almost ready.”I took a seat at the table and looked around at the delicious spread in front of me.
“This looks amazing,” I said, she placed the steaming hot bowl of soup on the dining table.
“It's a perfect meal for a cold day like this.”. She says.
She was right, the soup was warm and comforting, and the garlic bread was crispy and fragrant, I took a bite of the soup, and savored the rich flavors.
“This is delicious!”I said, taking another spoonful.
Nanny Dorothy smiled, clearly pleased with my reaction,
“I'm glad you like it, “ she said.
“It's one of my specialties and coincidentally, your favourite too.” She added.
“Like we're meant to be,” I said sitting down, then served us both.
We sat and ate, chatting about everything and nothing. It felt so good to just relax and enjoy a home-cooked meal. The world outside Carlos's house seemed perfect
As I ate, I thought about how grateful to have Dorothy here with me. We just met and I feel like I've known her for decades
She was like a second mother to me, and I cherished our relationship.
“Thank you for this,” I said, finishing my meal.
“It was just what I needed.”
“It's my pleasure.” She replied, gathering the dishes and taking them to the sink.
“Now, why don't you go relax and watch some TV? I did as she suggested, settling down on the couch and turning on the television. I flipped through the channels, looking for something to watch. After a few minutes, I found a documentary about the history of art, I settled back on the cushion and began to watch.
After a while, I dozed off completely only to be woken up by a loud thump, I sat up slowly, disoriented, and realized that I had fallen asleep on the couch. I must have been more tired than I thought.
The front door opened, and Andrew walked in, with a long face,
“Hi, you're back.” I said , he looked at me then went up stairs without greeting or answering to my greetings.
“Andrew? I called but he was not answering,
“Hey! I'm talking to you?” I called.
“Can you just let me be, Tara?” he yelled, making me flinch, what the hell happened out there in the office?
I flinched, as I looked at him with shock, not expecting that from him.
“Tar_” he sighs seeing what he had done, I drifted back,
As I walked past him rushing up the stairs, I met with Nanny Dorothy, but I was too broken to say anything, I rushed into my room hearing her scold Andrew..”why would you do that?” She had said
The door opened after a while,
“I think you should leave.” I said to him,
“I'm so sorry, Tara.” He says.
“I think you're still upset_” before I could finish his gaze drifted off to the ring in the table, he frowned as if he had confirmed his suspicion.
“You're still in contact with Him?
“What?” My face suddenly went pale,
“No! I didn't know I had that with me.” I said with innocence in my eyes.
“Tara. You still love him?”
I froze on the spot not knowing what to say or do, he looked at me waiting for my answer, the door opened and Nanny walked in, her eyes were pitiful, this was a fight for just me and Andrew and she had nothing to say about it.
He came back upset. Did
Carlos says something to him? Well it looked like he knew something. I stood there transfixed.
“Andrew..I…” I tried to say but the words were not coming out, I stretched out my hand to hold him but he drifted back, my face went pale immediately.
“Tara!” He called, making me flinch,
What should I say?
“I don't know? Or do I think so?
Before I could say anything, He turned and walked out of the door, hanging it loudly.
As he walked out, Nanny Dorothy couldn't say anything, she called out to him,
“Andrew?” Leaving me to my despair.
I collapsed on the bed,
what have I done?”
“Do I love Carlos or not!’ I yelled at my stupid heart.