Chapter 20

The last thing Allena wanted to do was think about Justin getting married. Second, she corrected. The very last thing she wanted to do was spend an hour or so at the pizza parlour and pretend that she wasn’t dying inside.

Of course, the kids quickly pulled her out of her funk, and once they were seated and had ordered, she listened as Jayden spoke about the latest book on dragons that he was reading. Jayden usually didn’t say much—he was like his father in that way, but she’d sensed his need for quiet conversation and reassurance for days. And Cassie clung to her, holding her hand, demanding hugs and kisses before bedtime.

Determined to make the transition as easy as possible for the children, Allena realised she needed to spend lots of time with both of them over the ensuing weeks, so they both understood why she was leaving in a way that made them feel safe and loved.

As she watched the kids munching on breadsticks, Allena’s logic blurred. She’d always known how hard leaving them would be, but faced with the reality that her departure from their lives was only a couple of weeks away, an ache formed deep within her chest. She loved them, knew the feelings were reciprocated, and suddenly experienced an acute sense of loss that rocked her to the core.

“Are you okay, Allena?”

Justin’s deep voice pulled her from her thoughts. “I’m fine.”

“You look pale.”

“Must be the lighting in here,” she said, and she grabbed a breadstick. “Or just my complexion.”

He rested his elbows on the table and linked his hands. “You have nice skin.”

Allena’s cheeks burned. She wasn’t used to receiving compliments from him. “That’s sweet to say.”

“Sweet?” he mused and grinned slightly. "I don't think I’ve ever been called that before.”

Allena tried to bite back the smile forming on her lips, but failed. “I’m sure Mittie thinks so.”

Justin chuckled. “As my grandmother, she’s biassed.”

Allena suspected Mittie thought her grandson had hung the moon. “She is, but everyone else can’t be wrong.”

He laughed again, and the deep, sexy sound made her skin goose bump. “To know me is to love me, you mean?”

Emotion rose through her blood, but she still managed a shaky smile. “I wouldn't... I wouldn’t go that far.”

His gaze darkened. “Allena, after all this time, you know me pretty well.”

“I guess I do.”

Their pizza arrived before he could respond, and Allena spent the following minutes dishing out slices to the kids and peeling the crust off Cassie’s piece. Justin chatted with Jayden about a new video game he wanted for his birthday the following month, while she tended to Cassie, and she figured that to an onlooker, they would appear to be a run-of-the-mill family. The moment became all the more poignant to Allena when she realised it might be the last time they would be out together as a group. The notion deeply saddened her, and she shuddered.

“Everything all right?” Justin asked, swaying a little closer to her.

She nodded. “Sure. Fine.”

Of course it wasn’t the truth, but she couldn’t let him know that. The remainder of dinner was done quickly. The kids pleaded for gelato, and they devoured it with giggles and messy hands. Allena cleaned them up before they headed home, and they both fell asleep in the backseat well before the vehicle hit the highway. When they arrived at the ranch, Justin carried Jayden inside to his room, and Allena did the same with Cassie. She was changing the dozing child into her pyjamas when she spotted Justin coming through the doorway of the bedroom.

“Jayden didn’t stir,” he whispered, flicking on the nightlight. “Kids could sleep through a tornado.”

Allena smiled, tucked the blanket around Cassie’s shoulders, and the youngster stirred and moaned. “Not this one,” she said softly, gently placing Cassie’s favourite teddy alongside her pillow. “She’s too busy being a part of the world.”

He looked down at his now-sleeping child. “She really is amazing. So full of life. She’ll never be tied down... like her mom, I guess.”

Allena heard the melancholy in his voice, and her gaze strayed to the small, framed photograph of Jayne De Nero on the bedside table. “Roots and wings.”

He nodded. “You mean, she’s got a predictable stick-in-the-mud like me for a father, and her mom was the free spirit? You’re right. Although Jayne did have a pragmatic side to her.”

“I don’t think you’re a stick in the-mud,” she said as they headed from the room and walked down the hallway.

He grinned. “Thanks, but I’m an office man. I’m supposed to be a bore.”

“You’re not boring,” she said, way too quickly, as they rounded the corner and entered the kitchen. “You’re…you’re…”

“I’m?” he prompted. “What?”

Allena blinked a couple of times, adjusting her eyes to the brighter light in the room. “You’re…you know…you.”

He laughed. “I’m not sure that’s a compliment.”

“It is,” she said and shrugged. “Well, I think I’ll turn in. Thank you for dinner.”

“Allena,” he said and reached out, grabbing her hand.

She felt the warmth of his touch right down to the soles of her feet. “What?”

He didn’t move. “I know tonight was hard for you. I mean, I know you’re going to miss them,” he said quietly, right on point. “They’ll miss you, too. And so will I,” he added.

In her heart, she knew he would, but not for the reasons she wanted or needed.

“You’ll get into another routine with someone else,” she said, thinking she should move and put space between them, thinking she should pull away and not like the touch of his hand so much, but she didn’t. “And life will go on, as normal.”

His gaze stayed with hers. “Is that what you think you are to me, Allena? Merely routine? I assure you, that’s not the case.”

“Then what—”

“Allena,” he said, his voice sharp and almost breathless as he cut her off. “Marry me?”

"What?"

"Marry me!"