A Father's Regret
When I graduated, I chose an out of state college, because I didn’t want to be around him and his parents. Cole was not the loving hugging grandpa. Grandma Bernice was very loving though, she was also kind to me during Thanksgiving and Christmas dinners over the years. It was not until my graduation that I found out Ethan was married to Vanessa. All four of them showed up at my graduation and that is how I found out about her. She was never at any family gatherings in the past. When grandpa Cole introduced her, all I did was look at Ethan with death stares. I could see the guilt in his eyes. My mother was a strong woman, how could she have loved someone so weak? That weekend was when I found out he was married the whole time he was with my mother. He didn’t love her enough to divorce his wife; he was legally separated for nineteen years.
Fast forward three years and here I sit in these people’s houses being called a fat ugly pig with bad acne. Is no way funny to me. I know I am not the most beautiful woman in the world. But being five feet ten inches tall weighing one hundred and forty pounds with an hourglass shape, thirty four D bra size, blue eyes and very curly jet black long hair. You can bounce a quarter off my very nice toned ass and I have no acne by the way. So, I wouldn’t call myself a fat ugly pig or a fat anything for that matter and I refused to be characterized as such. I have no idea why they would think I would agree to give up my life for them and this bullshit. I don’t need or want their money. The money and stuff my mother left me is still in a trust waiting for me. Granted it is not a millions or billions of dollars, but it will be enough for me. My plan of becoming a lawyer like my mother, is right around the corner. I am sure that with what I already have and what I will be making, it will be enough to support myself.
Still waiting on Ethan to say his peace, about this stupid meeting. “ Kadian, this marriage is very important to your grandfather, could you please reconsider your decision?” Is he serious right now? “ Your father is the reason my mother died alone and heartbroken. I don’t care what is important to him or you for that matter. Why would I sacrifice my life and happiness for the two people I hate the most?” Grandma Bernice gasped and covered her mouth. Grandpa Cole on the other hand was mad as hell. He started pointing his finger at me, shaking his head “ Your mother was a home wrecker that destroyed my son's marriage.” Did this old frat just disrespected my mother? “ Father! Are you crazy? I loved Ellison, you were the one that made me lose her and my only daughter. How can you say that about her? Plus you know very well that I met her after I left Vanessa.” My father stood up, took my hand and led me out of the house.
We were both upset about his fathers words about my mother. This was the first time I saw or heard my father raise his voice to anyone. “ I am really sorry about not being a good father to you. I am sorry, I was not strong enough to fight for you and your mother back then. But you must know that I loved her and you very much. I wanted to marry her, she was the only person that made me happy. I listened to my father and his backwards thinking and lost you both.” he was crying and I kind of felt sorry for him, because at least I had another five years with her that he didn’t get. At the same time I wish he had grown a backbone sooner, because she was waiting for him all that time. “ Don’t worry you don’t have to marry anyone you don’t want to.” Even though I was not planning on marrying anyone, it was still good to hear him defend me.
We drove to his apartment in silence. When we got inside, he looked sad. “ She never stopped loving you. She had your pictures all over the house and she never dated anyone again. She was waiting for you to come and get us, she never gave up hope.” He started sobbing, holding his head in his hands. It was weird seeing a grown man crying like a baby. In a moment of weakness I gave him a hug and he just cried even harder.