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Chapter 03

Emily

Each passing day, the weight of what was coming seemed to grow heavier. My wedding with Michael was set for a few weeks from now, and everyone around me seemed thrilled for me—except me. The choices that once felt so certain were now shrouded in doubt, fueled by Alexander’s return and the conflicting feelings he had resurfaced.

I was at the florist, picking out the final arrangements for the ceremony. My mother was by my side, excitedly commenting on the flowers that best matched the wedding theme. Everything seemed perfect; the life I had always dreamed of was just a few steps away from becoming reality, but my mind couldn’t focus. While she spoke, I barely listened, lost in a whirlwind of thoughts.

“Emily, what do you think of these? White roses or lilies?” my mother asked, smiling.

I looked at the flowers without really seeing them, their sweet scent mingling with the bitter feeling growing inside me. “They’re beautiful, Mom,” I replied automatically, not even sure which ones she had pointed to.

She frowned, noticing my distraction. “Are you okay? You’ve seemed so distant lately.”

I smiled, but it didn’t reach my eyes. “I’m just tired from all the planning. Everything’s fine.” It was the same excuse I had been repeating to everyone, including myself. But the truth was, everything was far from fine.


I returned home that night, exhausted, but the exhaustion wasn’t physical; it was emotional. The apartment was quiet, only the echoes of my thoughts keeping me company. I opened the closet and saw my wedding dress hanging there, the delicate white lace reflecting the soft light of the room. It was beautiful, perfect, but instead of bringing me joy, the sight of it caused a tightness in my chest.

I remembered when Michael and I chose it together, how he had held my hand and promised that this would be the start of our new life. At that moment, I had believed I was ready to move on, to leave the past behind. But now, with Alexander back, that certainty had turned into a fragile illusion.

I sat on the floor of my bedroom, hugging my knees, as the tears I had been holding back for days finally came. I loved Michael, I knew that. He was everything I had ever wanted: a good, stable man who treated me with respect and care. But there was a part of me, a dark and stubborn part, that still clung to Alexander and what he represented—a tumultuous love, full of ups and downs, but also filled with passion and intensity.

The phone buzzed beside me, and my heart raced when I saw Alexander’s name on the screen. He was becoming a constant presence, a ghost I couldn’t exorcise. I closed my eyes, trying to ignore it, but the message was already burned into my mind without opening it. He wanted to see me. He wanted to talk. He wanted a chance to explain.

Why, just now, when I was days away from getting married, did he have to come back and mess everything up? The answer seemed simple—because Alexander always wanted me on his terms, in his time, without caring what it cost me.

I spent the rest of the night trying to work, trying to focus on anything that would take me away from that state of indecision, but it was useless. Alexander’s face, his words, his promise that he had changed—all of it echoed in my head. And along with it, the vision of Michael smiling, so confident that I was his choice, that nothing could come between us.

The next morning, I woke up with swollen eyes and a heavy heart. Michael called me early, excited about the invitations that had finally been sent out. “We’re almost there, love! Just a few more weeks, and we’ll officially be husband and wife,” he said, his voice overflowing with joy.

I closed my eyes, trying to absorb his enthusiasm, but all I felt was a lump in my throat. “Yes, we’re almost there,” I replied, my voice sounding distant even to myself.

At work, I sat at my desk and tried to bury myself in tasks, but focus wouldn’t come. My fingers moved across the keyboard aimlessly, while my mind wandered, torn between the future I had planned with Michael and the unfinished past with Alexander.

Then, I received an email from the wedding planner, confirming final details. Instead of bringing relief, it only added to the weight I was already carrying. Each confirmed detail felt like another step closer to a destiny that, deep down, I wasn’t sure I wanted.

During lunch, I left the office aimlessly, seeking the cold air to clear my mind. I passed by a jewelry store and stopped in front of the window, my eyes fixed on a diamond ring. It looked like the engagement ring Alexander once promised me on one of those dreamy nights when he said we would one day be more than just hidden lovers. But that promise, like so many others, never came true.

I walked without direction until I found myself in front of the café where Alexander and I used to meet. The same place where, years ago, he had kissed me for the first time, not caring who might see. I loved him in that moment because he made me feel special, desired, something I had never felt before. And now, this same place felt like a minefield of memories I was trying to avoid.

I walked in without thinking, and the familiar smell of coffee and pastries enveloped me. I sat at a table in the back, trying to push away the nostalgia. Then I felt movement in front of me, and when I looked up, there he was—Alexander, as if he knew exactly where to find me. He didn’t say anything, just sat down, his eyes locked on mine.

“What are you doing here?” I asked, too drained to get up and leave.

He looked at me with that gaze that always disarmed me. “I don’t want to lose you, Emily.”

His words echoed, and the conflict I was trying to bury exploded with full force. I was just steps away from a secure future, but Alexander made me remember that security wasn’t always what the heart wanted. And there, in that café that was once ours, I stood between two worlds—the past pulling me with an irresistible force and the present promising peace, which I wasn’t sure I could embrace.

Tears threatened to fall, but I held them back. I couldn’t keep being torn. I had to choose, and that choice would break my heart either way.

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