CHAPTER TWELVE

OLIVER

I sat on the bare floor and stared at my infeccted hand - the one that was touched by Jenna. Acid churning at the back of my throat. I wanted to sprint to the bathroom and scrub her touch away. I wanted to peel off the area she touched. But I couldn't move. I couldn't stand. I was frozen in place. It felt like I've been transported back to that old warehouse from two decades ago. I could feel the cable wires tied around my ankles digging into my skin. I could feel the darkness closing in on me and the stench of blood and burnt flesh filling everywhere. The monsters in the warehouse were trying to get their hands on me. It was cold. Really cold. My tiny body shivered against the cold hard floor. My throat tightened as I gasp for air.

The nausea rose up to my throat and I threw up on the living room floor. My instincts kicked in and I rushed to the bathroom. I needed to scrub her touch off me. As I was rushing to the bahroom, I came across Dallas. But that didn't slow my pace. The monsters from the warehouse were chasing me. They were trying to dig their claws into my skin. I couldn't let them catch up with me. I ran faster.

"Hey, where are you-?"

I slammed the bathroom door hard. I rushed to the faucet and flipped it to extra hot. The water came out with full force on my hand but it did nothing to wash away her touch. I pressed my hand harder into the water. I needed to get it off me. I need to- Argh!. The images flooded into my head with full force.

"Come on Ollie, you're going to love it."

"Don't run away from me, Ollie. You'll enjoy it."

"Please, let me go. I want to go home."

Screams. Screams. Lots of screams. Gunshot. My dad's warm embrace. His eyes widened as he took his last breath. Blood. Blood. And more blood. The voices and images clashed in my head. I needed to get her touch off me. My throat tightened and I struggled for air.

I can't breathe. I can't breathe. I can't- Argh!

Scrub, I need something to scrub it off. My eyes darted to the bathroom window. Without thinking about it, I grabbed a mop that was nearby and threw it at the glass window. I rushed to it and grabbed a piece of glass. Tiny pieces of glass pierced my bare foot but I couldn't even register the pain. I went back to the faucet and placed my hand under the water. I roughly scrubbed my already bruised hand with the piece of glass. But it did nothing to block away the voices in my head nor did it erase the image in my head.

I heard persistent knocks on the bathroom door followed by Dallas's voice.

"Mr Kang, are you okay? I heard shattering of glasses."

"Oliver!" she called. More knocking.

I didn't reply to her. I wanted her to leave even though a tiny bit of me also wanted her to wait. She is the only one I wanted to see right now. Her decisive smile. Her fiery red hair. Her tiny but curvaceous body. I wanted to see her, hold her, and beg her to fix me. But I also don't want her to see me in this position. Pathetic. Helpless. And trying so hard to scrub an invisible touch of my hand. The knocking stopped so I thought she had left.

"I'm coming in so if you're close to the door, it will be best for you to move."

Those were the last words I heard before the door burst open and Dallas walked in. Her eyes widened as she saw what I was doing. I didn't have time to register how she was able to break the door open before she rushed to me and collected the glass from me.

"Oh my God."

She quickly switched the faucet from hot to cold. She grabbed the edge of my shirt that was covered in blood and placed my hand under the cold water. All images of Jenna touching me vanished from my head the minute my eyes landed on Dallas. The shadows of the monsters swirling around retreated back to their hiding places as soon as Dallas entered the bathroom. The cold water hit my bruised skin as a soothing sensation washed all over my body. Dallas was careful not to touch me. I wanted to tell her that I wouldn't mind her touching me at all, in fact, I wanted her touch.

"Why are you hurting yourself? Are you crazy?"

A smile tilted at the corner of my lips. It has never felt this good to be scolded before. She had a special way of making all of her actions amusing. Maybe my ailment is starting to affect my brain. I just smiled when my maid called me crazy. I am really crazy. I shook my head and collected my thoughts.

"She touched me." I said simply.

I expected her to ask more questions about why I decided to burn myself because of a simple touch. But she didn't. She must have noticed that I don't touch anyone. She merely focused on washing the blood off my hand. She was however careful of touching me. I wanted to tell her that I wouldn't mind her touching me at all, I wanted her touch. But I didn't tell her that.

If Dallas had asked why I freaked out over a touch, I had no answer for her. All except that I am fucked up in the head because of an incident that happened twenty years ago. And that I'm so helpless and pathetic that I let it still affect my present. That no matter how powerful and succesful I have become, I'm still hung up on those memories. The monsters from my past still haunt me.

Once when I developed the ailment, Suzy took me to a psychiatrist. The psychiatrist told me that the monsters wouldn't haunt me unless I allow them to. I wasn't able to stop them from coming back. I tried touching more people and going through the torture everytime. I had hoped I would eventually get used to it. Turns out, it's not something you get used to. Eventually I stopped trying. I let the monsters win. And now they control my life.

"Does it hurt?" Dallas asked. I could hear a crack in her voice. I silently hoped it was because she was mad at me and not sorry for me. I would feel more disappointed in myself.

"No." I said truthfully. Except for a tiny sting I feel, I could barely register the pain. I was completely numb to the pain.

Dallas swallowed hard. She turned off the faucet and gently let go of my shirt.

"I'll go get the first. And something to clean these up."

She was referring to the pieces of glasses on the bathroom floor. I nodded. She gave me one last look, her eyes seems to be pleading to me not to hurt myself. I gave her a nod. She walked out of the bathroom, minding the broken glassses on the floor. I drew a long sigh.

I leaned against the wall, series of thoughts swirling in me. The flashes of today's occurence flashed through my head. I was going to marry Jenna. What if what happened today repeated itself someday in our marriage?. Panic start to surge in me. I closed my eyes tight and tried to steady myself. It was going to be fine. Dallas would cure me before then.

A thought crossed my mind. In my haste to get cured, I had hired Dallas without considering why she was my cure. Why did Jenna's touch sent me revolting and Dallas's touch is my cure?. I needed to find out aabout it. I walked out of the bathroom, my entire feet coated with blood.