Read with BonusRead with Bonus

Chapter 1: A Restless Mind

Eliza sat in the corner of the crowded university café, her fingers tracing the rim of her coffee cup, untouched and growing cold. The room buzzed with the hum of chatter and the clinking of cups, but Eliza was somewhere else—lost in the pages of the dog-eared book in front of her. The worn paperback was her constant companion, a refuge from the whirlwind of emotions swirling inside her. Words were her escape, a world where she could lose herself and momentarily forget the complicated life waiting for her outside the safe bubble of literature.

She tucked a loose strand of her wavy dark hair behind her ear, her eyes flicking up as a burst of laughter erupted from the table across the room. Her friends were there, talking animatedly, their lives seemingly simple and carefree. She used to be part of that laughter, but recently, something inside her had shifted. It wasn’t just her family—though that was complicated enough. It was everything.

"Hey, Eliza," a voice broke through her reverie. It was Claire, her best friend. Claire's voice was as bright as her personality, but Eliza could hear the edge of concern. "You coming over, or are you going to sit there and brood all afternoon?"

Eliza forced a smile, one that didn’t quite reach her eyes. "I’m fine here, Claire. I’ve got to finish this paper."

Claire sighed, pulling out a chair next to Eliza. "You’ve been saying that all week. What's going on? You’ve been different. Distant."

Eliza looked away, staring at the rain tapping against the window. "It’s just... things at home are a bit complicated right now."

Complicated didn’t even begin to cover it. Her family life was a delicate web of secrets and tensions. Her father had remarried two years ago, and her new stepmother, Sarah, was kind enough—too kind, sometimes—but it never felt like home. And then there was Alex, her stepbrother, who had come back from his internship abroad. Their relationship was… strange, to say the least. He had grown from the aloof, indifferent teenager she once knew into someone who now occupied far too many of her thoughts. There was an undeniable tension, something unspoken between them that made her heart race every time he was near.

"You know I’m here for you, right?" Claire’s voice softened, pulling her back to the moment.

Eliza swallowed, nodding slightly. "I know. It’s just... hard to explain."

Claire’s eyes searched her face, as if trying to find the answer hidden in Eliza’s distant gaze. "Is it your stepmom again? Or... Alex?" she asked cautiously.

Eliza’s stomach twisted at the mention of his name. "It's not... it's everything," she said, her voice barely above a whisper. "I just feel so out of place. Even in my own family."

Claire hesitated, her hand reaching for Eliza’s. "You’re not alone. You know that, right?"

Eliza smiled weakly, though her heart wasn’t in it. Claire meant well, but how could she understand? How could anyone? The complicated, forbidden thoughts swirling around in Eliza’s mind were hers alone to carry. No one could know what she felt—what she couldn’t allow herself to feel.

But it wasn’t just her family. Lately, she had found herself drawn to something, someone else—Professor James. His lectures on literature were the highlight of her week, his passion for the subject magnetic. There was something about the way he spoke, the way he looked at her when he praised her essays that made her feel... seen. He had even started staying after class to talk to her, offering her guidance and feedback that felt more personal than it should.

Her phone buzzed, jolting her from her thoughts. A message from her stepmother, Sarah: Dinner tonight at 7? Hope to see you there.

Eliza sighed, her fingers tightening around the phone. Sarah was trying, but their relationship felt like an awkward dance—always careful, always polite, never close. And yet, there was a warmth in Sarah that Eliza sometimes found herself drawn to, much like Alex. It was confusing, and everything seemed to blur together in ways she didn’t understand.

"What’s that?" Claire asked, peering at the screen.

"Just my stepmom. Family dinner tonight."

"You going?"

Eliza shrugged, her voice hollow. "I guess I have to."

That evening, the atmosphere at the dinner table was suffocating. Eliza sat between her father and Alex, trying to ignore the strange tension that always seemed to linger between them. Sarah was talking about something, but Eliza couldn’t focus. Her eyes kept darting to Alex, who sat across from her, his jaw clenched, his gaze distant.

"Eliza," her father’s voice cut through her thoughts, "how’s school going?"

"It’s fine," she said quickly, pushing her food around her plate. "Just busy with papers and stuff."

"She’s doing great," Alex said suddenly, his deep voice catching her off guard. "I read one of her essays. She’s always been brilliant."

Eliza’s heart skipped a beat, and she looked up, meeting his eyes for a brief, charged moment. There was something in his gaze, something unreadable but intense, that made her pulse quicken.

Sarah smiled warmly. "We’re all so proud of you, Eliza. You’ve worked so hard."

"Thanks," she murmured, her throat tight. She could feel the weight of Alex’s gaze on her, and it made her want to disappear, to escape the confusing emotions building inside her.

As the conversation continued, Eliza excused herself, her head spinning. She wandered to the backyard, the cool night air a welcome relief. She leaned against the porch railing, staring up at the stars.

"Couldn’t handle it in there either?"

Alex’s voice startled her, and she turned to see him standing in the doorway, his hands in his pockets, that same unreadable look in his eyes.

"Yeah," she breathed. "It’s just... a lot."

He stepped closer, his presence warm and overwhelming. "You’ve been distant," he said quietly, his eyes searching hers. "What’s going on, Eliza?"

Eliza swallowed, her heart racing. She looked away, unable to meet his gaze. "Nothing. Just... school."

"Don’t lie to me." His voice was soft but firm, and when she looked up, she saw a flicker of something in his eyes—something that mirrored her own confusion.

"I don’t know, Alex," she whispered, her voice trembling. "I don’t know what’s going on anymore."

Alex stepped closer, so close she could feel the warmth of his body, and for a moment, everything else fell away. There was only him, and her, and the weight of all the things they weren’t supposed to feel.

"Maybe neither of us does," he said softly, his voice almost a whisper.

The silence between them was thick with unspoken words, emotions too dangerous to acknowledge. And yet, in that moment, standing there in the dark with Alex so close, Eliza couldn’t deny the truth.

She was falling—falling into something she wasn’t supposed to feel. Something she couldn’t stop.

Next Chapter