CHAPTER 3 Our Past

Anna'pov

I watched Lucas's eyes dim the moment I asked him even though he didn't say anything. Just like the past, was he planning to avoid this conversation?

I wondered as I flashed back to what had happened a few years back.

It was a few weeks until Christmas eve and I hadn't seen my brother because I was busy trying to meet up with expectations about my grades which seemed like they were falling.

The moment I had stopped right in front of the cafe not too far from the college he studied, I met Lucas who walked with my brother and seemed dashing in the simple outfit he had.

However, it seemed like I was far from thoughts as my brother and his friend talked from a distance but I was lost in thoughts. The ecstatic fantasy came overwhelming and all I wanted was to be with him because I had fallen in love with him the moment I set my eyes on him.

"Hi, you're Anna? You're beautiful" He complimented softly but I couldn't hear what he had said. The fact that he made my heart race faster than ever made me drool more.

"Anna! Anna!" My brother tapped me while I jolted back to consciousness while I looked at them in embarrassment.

Lucas smiled instead and helped himself to the nearest seat while I sat across him.

"Anna, so tell me about yourself." He began while my heart leaped. The fact that he told me to tell him about myself made it seem like everything was happening so fast and I could swear that if I was the guy, I would do nothing more than try to have my woman at that moment.

But sadly, it seemed like he never wanted me or so did I think.

"I'm Anna." I stuttered, not knowing what else to say as I stared at my brother who chuckled.

"Hey, you don't have to ask her that and besides, she's still young. Whatever you want to ask her should be directed towards me" Oliver said while Lucas smiled.

His smile made my heart leap with joy. I watched the both of them talk about something else while my gaze was solely focused on the man whom I desperately wanted to be with even if he was higher in level than I. I was just a high schooler but I was definitely sure that it would not hurt so much if I tried to be with a man that was in college.

The night after that, I was definitely sure that my heart wanted Lucas. I desperately wanted to be with him and from the looks of things, I was sure that he did not seem to be with any woman.

However, I had sat up all night checking through the internet to see what suggestions I could go with just to make sure that I impressed Lucas so much.

My eyes throbbed so hard that I was definitely sure I could have an infection at this rate but I did not care about that. All I wanted was Lucas and I was determined to let him know how I felt.

It was christmas eve and everywhere seemed chilly, crisp and freezing due to winter and I was definitely sure that moment was the perfect time to confess my feelings to Lucas as I watched him from a distance chit chat with my brother alongside everyone who had probably come around for a thing or two all dolled in coats and scarves.

"Anna" Lucas had called out while I smiled nervously thinking of what I had prepared already for Lucas who seemed to have no idea of what I was about to do.

The more I found myself walking towards them, the more nervous I became but I was definitely sure that he felt the same way I felt towards him.

"Lucas" I said softly while he smiled at me and held my hands. I must have been naive enough not to have known that he probably had other intentions.

"How have you been? It's been a while I've seen you" He said while I nodded shyly. He was definitely sure that something seemed off but he couldn't place it..

I hadn't smiled sheepishly in the presence of his friends in the past because I believed that keeping a straight face was all that mattered.

"I have something to tell you" I began as he looked at me while my heart raced in fear. The last time I had done this, it almost ended in a disaster because I hadn't practiced so well.

"I love you!" I screamed out and closed my eyes but I could swear that everything seemed like it was still at that moment.

I released the grip on my left eye and had it opened only to see everyone stare at me while Lucas looked at everyone and exhaled out.

Why didn't I see the loving smile on his face? Wasn't that what lovers did? I was disappointed and scared at the reaction I was seeing. Only then did I realize that I just made a fool of myself as Lucas stared at me for a while.

I could see everyone look at me with eyes of disgust while I felt like the ground should open up and swallow me.

"Anna, I do not love you" He dropped the bombshell while my heart shook in anger. I thought I was his taste since it seemed like he was in love with me. He acted all lovey-dovey but I was the fool in love.

I was told that one sided love hurt and sure, it did.

"Do you want me to change anything about me?" I asked him while he scoffed again and shook his head.

"What you need now is to read. You are too young and besides, our levels are different and I am definitely sure that your brother wouldn't want this also" He said, leaving me heartbroken.

I could not bear being embarrassed in the presence of everyone as I found myself running far away from the man that made me shed so much tears.

The next morning, my brother visited after hearing that I was ill since we had so many plans last night. However, I was too worried to see him.

"You okay?" He asked me while I shook my head. I wasn't okay and I was sure of it.

My heart still shook with pain from the embarrassment I had faced last night.

"I would have called Lucas over seeing that you feel so comfortable around him but he left the country this morning" My brother said.

I couldn't believe my ears. He probably left because of me and I was sure of that. My heart shook the more when I realized that he had probably left just because he was trying to avoid me and never wanted to see me again.