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Chapter 3

My mother got up to answer.

“Melissa, I made some tea. How is she doing?” Luna Joy asked.

“Thank you, but I’m fine. She is holding on and being strong,” my mother said. There was a tone of dismissal in her voice. She was telling Luna she wasn’t welcome.

“I was hoping to sit with her for a while. To see if I can’t be of some help or comfort,” Luna Joy said.

“I don’t think that’s a good idea. Armeria needs her family at the moment.”

“Melissa,” Luna gasped. “I would like to think of myself as family. We have always been close since we mated Mark and Ron.”

“I would have said the same yesterday. But after what Ja…” There was a pause, as if my mother needed time to compose herself. “After what your son did to my baby, I think we need to rethink certain things. I need to protect Armeria and put her first. We both know how this will affect her. We both know the pack won’t give her the same protection they would give someone rejected by a wolf who isn’t the future Alpha, would get. The least I can do is make sure she is around the right people.”

“I love her like a daughter,” Luna objected.

“But not enough to fight for her right to become your daughter by mating. Joy, you are my Luna and I will respect and obey you in all but this. My daughter is out of bounds for anyone in your family from this day,” my mother said and the door to my room closed. I felt the bed dip as my mother sat down and continued to stroke my hair. In the middle of all my pain, I felt the love from my parents and it soothed some of it. At least two people in this world loved me. But it also made me sad. Because of me, they were now at odds with their closest friends, their Alpha pair. This wouldn’t just affect our two families. If the Alpha and Beta couple were in conflict, that would have an impact on the whole pack. And even though my brother had chosen James, I wanted to pretend he had struggled with the decision before making it. It seemed like I was making everyone’s lives more complicated. As I couldn’t sleep, and I didn’t want my mother to think I was awake, I spent the rest of the night thinking. By the time my brother arrived back home after the sun had risen, I had reached a decision. During the early morning hours, I relaxed a little and let go of my knees. I heard my brother get home, walk upstairs and open the door to my room. My knees drew up to my chest again.

“How is she?” Elder asked our mother.

“Enduring. Your father needs to speak with you. We need to find a way to protect your sister,” she said.

“I’ll go and talk to him. After I can sit with her so you can rest,” he offered. I didn’t want him to sit with me. I knew my brother’s betrayal wasn’t big in the grand scheme of things. But at the moment my heart and soul were raw, like they both had got a sunburn that meant even a tiny speck of sand felt like agony when rubbing against it.

“I’m fine. I will stay with her until she wakes up,” mother said. I was eternally grateful to her. I heard my brother go downstairs, and I heard enough of his conversation with our father to know they were discussing if sending me away to another pack would be a good solution. After a while, I stopped listening. The conversation only confirmed what I already knew. I was causing problems for my family. I didn’t have a wolf and therefore I had become a burden. It was up to me to solve all the problems I had created. I turned around and looked at my mother. She smiled down at me and let her hand caress my cheek. I didn’t have it in me to smile back, but I turned into her hand.

“My brave and strong daughter, we will get you through this and you will dazzle the world,” she told me, and kissed my forehead. If I could have smiled, I would have. My mother was amazing and my insides burned with the guilt that I was causing so much problems for her. I just nodded. “Are you hungry?” she asked, but I shook my head. Instead, I reached out my arms towards her, like I had done when I was little. She gave me a sad smile and drew me into a long hug. Then I lay back down, this time facing the door. My mother continued to sit with me. It didn’t take long for the door to open and my father to come inside. He looked so tired it almost made me cry all over again.

“Hey, pumpkin, your mom told me you were up. Want me to make you some of my famous spaghetti?” he asked as he kneeled by my bed so he could look me in the eyes. My father’s famous spaghetti was just boiled noodles with cut up hotdogs and lots of ketchup. My dad couldn’t cook to save his life, but on days my mom needed a break from cooking or was away, he made us his spaghetti. Both me and Elder loved it as it was something my mother would never let us eat. It became our comfort food in a way. I just shook my head. “Okay, baby girl. It will all be okay. I will make it okay,” he said and kissed me on my head. A single tear ran down my cheek. I knew he meant it. He would stop at nothing to make sure I was happy again. It was up to me to make sure he didn’t have to. Elder came into my room as well. The look he gave me told me how sorry he was for me.

“I can sit with her for a while,” he offered again. I saw my mother start to object, but I put my hand on hers and nodded.

“Are you sure? I don't mind staying,” she said. I just nodded.

“Okay, pumpkin. I will make sure your mother gets some rest. But we will be back in two hours and we will bring food. I’m expecting you to eat. Okay?” my father asked. I nodded. “Good girl.” I got a kiss from both of them on my head before they left. Elder took my mother’s place on the bed.

“I don’t know what to do,” he said. I looked up at him and saw the swirl of emotions in his eyes. He must feel so torn and like being pulled in all directions. His love for me, his loyalty to family, his best friend, the future he had envisaged and trained for, the loyalty to the pack and to his alpha. They were all tugging at him. I took his hand and squeezed it. Tears ran down his face. “Look at me, here I am supposed to comfort you and I’m the one bawling my eyes out and you are the one comforting me,” he sniffed. I sat up and kissed his cheek. He was a good brother, even if he had his flaws. “I wish I could change his mind, that I could make him see what an idiot he is. The Gods know I have tried, but it’s like he is obsessed with strength. I can’t even get him to see there are different strengths. That you possess so many of them, even if you don’t possess the physical kind,” he told me. I understood then where he had been all night. He hadn’t forsaken me for James. It was the first time since the rejection I felt a small piece of warmth. I hugged him and we sat like that until I noticed the subtle change in his body and looked at him. He was mindlinking with someone and I could guess who. When they were done I nudged him to get up. “No, Amie, I’m staying,” he objected. I just shook my head and pushed him harder. “Okay, okay. I’ll go. I’ll just wake dad,” he said.

‘No. Let him sleep, he is tired. I’m just going to go back to sleep anyway. I’ll be fine,’ I mindlinked him.

‘Are you sure?’ he answered me.

‘I am. Thank you for staying with me.’ He gave me a hug and then left. As soon as I heard his footsteps leave the garden, I listened to make sure my parents were asleep. I got up and took out a backpack. I filled it with some clothes, some things that were most precious to me, and sneaked down into the kitchen to ransack the pantry, stuffing it into a separate bag. I put the two bags into my car and went back to the house, trying to be as quiet as I could. It was my speciality. Even without a wolf, I was good at sneaking around. I took the blanket my mother had knitted me and sat down to write a note. I starred on the blank page forever. There was so much I wanted to write, things that should be said in person and not written down on paper. But I knew if I waited for my parents to awake, they would never let me leave.

*‘Dear mom, dad and Elder.

I love you all so much and I know you love me. That is why I need to leave. I can’t let you destroy your friendships and standing in the pack for me. Know that I see how much you love me by your actions and know that I will always carry that knowledge in my heart and honour it.

Please don’t be angry with the Alpha family, please don’t destroy something that is so important to all of you. I will leave so I can find a new life and so you can live yours as it was intended. Please don’t try to find me, you have raised me well and I will be fine. I love you always.

With Love.

//A’*

I left the note on my bed with my set of house keys. Then I made my way downstairs and took a storm kitchen and a tent out of our storage. Making sure everything I needed was in the glove department in the car, I took a last look at the house that had been my home for eighteen years and I drove off.

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