Chapter 8
9 months later
Bri`
Calloused hands slid across my skin, I was impossibly full of them, their love. Open-mouth kisses and unshaven stubble grazed my skin as their energies played a symphony with mine. Waves of ecstasy rose and crashed and rose again. Tongues danced in time as we writhed together in the open air under the bright full moon. Heat burned and sweat beaded everywhere our bodies met and bliss devoured me as the wholeness of it all overtook me, overtook us. My light reached with its hungry tendrils and there was no worry in my mind. They were mine and I was theirs and we were us.
Starlight twinkled as my hair was pulled back harshly, lovingly, passionately. Wyatt's lips trailed down my throat as Beau’s tongue invaded my panting mouth. Sensations rippled through my being, the light leaching out of me as theirs sought out mine. My darkness cocooned it coaxing. Releasing that light felt like a harmony in the depths of my soul, it had been shackled, caged, and held prone for far too long. Here it was safe, sheltered, and loved. I could feel the blaze of our conjoined love as our beacons stretched closer to one another and then…
Sunlight crashed in around me and a wail escaped my throat as the dream was ripped violently away. Zoey rushed in from her room down the hall. She locked the door as other footsteps clamored from down the hall and I sobbed. Andrew began banging on the door and Zoey’s hushed voice assured him it was just a dream.
I pulled myself together, shoving bits of myself back somewhat where they should be, much like forcing the pieces of a jigsaw puzzle that didn’t fit together into spots they didn't belong, every morning new gaps shone through the core of what was left of me. The magic simmered violently under my skin. I reached for the liquor bottle beside my bed only to have Zoey shove a glass of water into it. I narrowed my eyes at her but complied.
“You can’t keep this up Bri, this has to stop.” Zoey confronted me. I sat there silent against my pillows that no longer smelled like them. With their scent gone I had finally conceded to having my linens changed. To Zoey’s agitation, it had failed to improve my dreams. Andrew and Trent assumed they were nightmares like before, the ones Andrew knew I had before leaving, the terrors that I carried with me before I had found the solace of my men. Now they plagued my dreams, shattering my heart every day when the sun ripped me away from them. I’d been trying to numb myself to it with the whiskey or whatever else I could find, but nothing worked.
“I’m doing the best I can Zoe,” I said, pushing my hair out of my face.
“You are killing yourself Bri, I can’t stand by and watch you waste away,” she insisted, before chucking an envelope into my lap.
“Nobody is making you,” the words came out before I knew it. This was Zoey I was speaking to not some coven head from another district trying to worm their way into my good graces nor the high council which had come a few months ago only to turn tail and run back to their cozy mansions and pray I dare forget their insolence. All my supporters had signed the document and there was little they could do. I pointed out they were lucky I didn’t disband them or replace them for their sheer lack of keeping the totality of North American witches in check. They would do better or I would step in.
“I'm sorry Zoey,” I said, walking the distance to her and wrapping my arms around her. “You of all people don’t deserve the bitter creature I’ve become.” she sighed and turned wrapping her arms around me as we embraced.
“I'm worried for you Bri, when we got you out this wasn’t the life I thought you would be living. You deserve more for all you've been through.”
“Not everyone gets a happily ever after Zoe, I chose this, there is no going back,” Zoey shook her head as if pushing a thought out of it. I looked down at the envelope in my hands, Bastian’s writing stared back. So he’d done it. I sighed as regret began to eat me from the inside. I couldn’t face them after what I had done, I also knew I wouldn't have the ability to walk away a second time.
“I’m going to get cleaned up,” I let her know as I disentangled myself from her. “Return to sender this,” I said, handing the envelope to her and I felt her eyes bore a hole into my back.
~~
It was late, I was reading from an old law book as I scrutinized an issue happening in a New England coven when Zoey walked in, Trent, and Andrew trailed behind her. I didn’t glance up. I just took a swig of whisky before I said, “Can I help you,” I asked, as I continued my perusal.
“We need to talk, Bri,” Zoey said, the tone in her voice was stern and it caused me to pause. I looked up at her and her expression bode of a heavy conversation. Just what I needed right now, it had been a trying day and my thoughts continuously went back to the letter I had dismissed. My eyes glanced to Trent, who looked down at the floor and avoided my gaze. He wasn’t a brave man but when it counted he was a good one. Andrew had become my advisor and Trent at times was a voice of reason I valued. I sat back in my chair.