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Chapter 7: You Gonna Kiss Me or Not

Jay was freaking out as he paced in his apartment. 'What happened today? Does Danny feel the same way I do?' He stopped pacing when that thought entered his head. For a second, his entire body started to vibrate with excitement and hope. Hope that Danial feels the same and that someday they could be together. As Jay started to imagine a future with his love, he looked down at his wrist. Seeing the still red marks for the last time he cut a couple of days ago.

Fear slowly crept up his spine as he realized that no one could possibly want a mentally damaged partner. That his own weakness would ruin any chance he had at happiness with the blonde he loved so much. Tears streamed down his face as he started to be overcome with depressing thoughts of what the blonde would say if he knew why the brunette always kept something covering his wrist or if he saw his thighs.

'Why can't you be normal?! Why can't you be strong like your friends?!' Those horrible thoughts overwhelmed his brain as he pulled at his hair, trying to will the thoughts to stop. Before he knew it, he was in the bathroom, opening up the case with his razors. When he opened the case, he saw the card right on top. His jade eyes widened with unshed tears, and he picked up the card. Taking a deep breath, he pulled out his phone and dialed the hotline number, putting in the extension for King.

"Hello, this is King. Deku, is that you?" King's voice was calm and soft, wrapping around Jay like a warm blanket on a cold winter day. It reminded Jay so much of Danial, but he knew it couldn't possibly be his love, even if the thought both made him happy and horrified that he would know all about Jay's mental illnesses. "Deku, I know it's you. You're the only one with my extension, but I need you to answer me. You're making me worried, so please, answer me."

"Hey King... Am I really the only one with your extension?" He heard a sigh of relief over the line, along with a light chuckle.

"Ya, Deku, you are. Are you okay? You sound like you've been crying," King said worry evident in his voice. Jay chuckled through his tears, trying to wipe them away as they fell.

"I just... had a really good day and... I had an amazing moment with the guy of my dreams... but then I got home and realized... I would be no good for him. That in the end... my problems would most likely drive him away from me." Jay was sobbing as he spoke into the phone. He was sitting on his couch, hunched over his head resting in his hands, elbows braced on his knees as his phone sat on the coffee table on speaker phone.

"Oh Deku, just because you have depression, and anxiety doesn't mean that this guy will think any less of you. Who knows, maybe he could help you, make you realize you are worth the fight. If he doesn't understand, then fuck him, he doesn't deserve you." King's voice was soft but firm at the same time, trying to get his point across. The brunette didn't like someone implying that Danial didn't deserve him.

"Danny deserves someone way better than some lame broken bartender." He said in a defeated tone.

Other end of the line, Danial froze. 'I'm the guy he's talking about?! I'm his crush?!' Danial couldn't help but smile, till he heard Jay sniffle on the other end of the phone.

"Deku, as far as I am concerned, you are not broken, and you are worth more than you know. Maybe you should just tell Danny how you feel," Danial said, trying not to give himself away. Jay chuckled, giving one last sniffle.

"King... Thank you for saying that... even if I don't believe it, it still means a lot to me. I doubt Danny would ever be interested in me, ya we had an amazing moment today, but we could have completely opposite viewpoints about it. For all I know, he thinks he was just helping a friend or something." Jay's voice was broken and made Danial want to tell him right then and there that King was Danial, and he cared for him too. But he couldn't, he feared that if he did come clean to the brunette now then he would ruin everything.

"You never know if you don't try. Jay, you are so special, and I am sure Danial sees that. You just have to be willing to look." Both of them were lost in the voice of the other over the phone, dreaming of the same thing.

Jay couldn't help but hear the hopefulness in King's voice. Just as Jay was about to deny King's words again, he realized King had called Danny Danial. He hadn't told him that Danny's real name was Danial or that it wasn't his real name. The little voice in the back of his brain started to speak up again, telling him that King and Danny were the same person. Usually, he would just ignore it and continue his conversation with King and enjoy their time together, but this time, he couldn't ignore it. He had to find out if it was true, but how?

"You sound pretty sure, King," Jay says chuckling, a small smile on his face.

"Laugh all you want, Deku, but you never know till you try." Jay knew he was right, but he didn't think he could handle the rejection. But if King was Danny, then this was a good thing, right? Danny would accept him and his mental disabilities, wouldn't he?

"Why are you so sure? Why do you want me to tell him so much," Jay asked, lifting his head up to look at his phone.

The blonde had no idea what he should say. He knew he had probably accidentally given himself away already by saying his given name instead of the nickname Jay gave him. Taking a deep breath, he finally found his words.

"Jay, sometimes you just have to take that leap and hope it ends the way you want. Dreams can't become reality unless you make them. And I want you to tell him because this could help you, help you make progress in getting better, and realize you are worth the fight. That there is someone out there that needs you and loves you the way you need." King's words were so gentle and reassuring. It made Jay start to tear up again with a loving smile.

"You are really good at this King. I can't thank you enough for saying that... I think I am going to try and get some sleep. Good night, King, thank you again. You always know how to make me feel better."

"You're welcome, Jay, good night. Get some sleep and I'm sure tomorrow will be better," Danial said, as Jay hung up. He leaned back in his chair, thinking about his conversation with the brunette. 'So, he likes me back.' He thinks with a smile.

After tossing and turning for close to three hours, Jay finally groaned looking at his alarm clock and getting out of bed. It was 15 minutes till 1 a.m. and he knew at this rate he would not get any sleep. "Fuck this, might as well get up and do something to tire myself out." He walked over to his dresser and pulled out some gym clothes, walking into the bathroom to get dressed and to check his healing cuts on his wrist. They were healing nicely, still a little red and tender, but still looked good. He pulls on his red wristbands after he changes into a green shirt and black shorts.

Jay grabs his water bottle from the drying rack filling it up and then grabs his keys, wireless headphones, and phone before he walks out the door. As he gets in the elevator, he puts in his headphones and puts on his workout music. He was so tense, and he needed to work out some of this tension if he was going to get any sleep.

"~Show me how to lie

You're getting better all the time

And turning all against the one

Is an art that's hard to teach

Another clever word

Sets off an unsuspecting herd

And as you step back into line

A mob jumps to their feet~"

Jay softly sings as he walks into the gym going straight for the punching bag.

"~Now dance, fucker, dance

Man, he never had a chance

And no one even knew

It was really only you

And now you steal away

Take him out today

Nice work you did

You're gonna go far, kid~"

Jay was wailing on that punching bag, making it swing all the way back on its chain with every hit. He couldn't get King's words out of his head. He was becoming more and more angry; angry at his shitty job, angry at his life, angry that he couldn't even man up and tell the man he loves how he feels, and angry with himself more than anything else.

"~With a thousand lies

And a good disguise

Hit 'em right between the eyes

Hit 'em right between the eyes

When you walk away

Nothing more to say

See the lightning in your eyes

See 'em running for their lives~"

Jay continues to sing along to the song, roundhouse kicking the punching bag with so much force it nearly swings off the stand holding it up.

It was then that Danial walked into the gym, stopping just inside the doorway when he saw Jay going to town on his poor bag.

"~Slowly out of line

And drifting closer in your sights

So, play it out, I'm wide awake

It's a scene about me

There's something in your way

And now someone is gonna pay

And if you can't get what you want

Well, it's all because of me~"

Danial couldn't believe how deep and enchanting Jay's voice was. He was completely entranced by him and was slowly walking closer and closer to the enchanting brunette. Who was throwing punch after punch at the sad-looking punching bag.

"~Now dance, fucker, dance

Man, I never had a chance

And no one even knew

It was really only you~"

Jay finally notices Danial standing there looking up at him with an awed expression. He gives the punching bag one more punch, making the bag burst open and spill sand all over the floor. Danial laughs as Jay hurries to remove his headphones, not even looking at the bag.

"Danny! What are you doing here," Jay says completely flushed, trying to compose himself.

"I came down here to work out, dork. What's got you so worked up," Danial says pointing at the dead punching bag, limply hanging from its chain.

"Oh, umm, I just couldn't sleep. A phrase I was told keeps rolling around in my head." Jay stares down into storm blue eyes, trying to see if Danial will know what he is talking about. Danial grinned, taking a step closer to Jay putting his hands on his hips knowing what phrase he was talking about, and he might as well come clean. Even if he was terrified at what that could mean for their relationship.

"Your dreams won't happen unless you make them happen. It's true you know." They stare into each other's eyes. Danial could see the conflict in Jay's eyes before Jay looked down at his wrists and then back up into those entrancing blue eyes. Slowly Danial moves his left hand to Jay's right, pulling Jay's wristband off his wrist, still keeping eye contact with him. Once he pulled the band from his wrist, he dropped it to the floor and rubbed the scars with his thumb. "These don't make you any less than anyone else, especially to me. We all have scars Jay, some more literally than others."

Jade eyes were glassy with unshed tears, focusing on the caring look the blonde was giving him and the way he was rubbing his scars. He watches as Danial slowly lifts his shirt to show Jay his scars from when he also used to cut along his side. The brunette's eyes widened once they saw the scars. He brings his left hand up to gently caress the scars. Danial's left hand is still rubbing Jay's right wrist, as his other hand covers Jay's left hand on his waist.

"You could have told me you were King, you know. It would have saved me from making a fool out of myself," Jay says, smiling down at Danial. Danial laughs throwing his head back, closing his eyes. 'That is the best sound in the world.' Jay thinks smiling down at him.

"You didn't make a fool out of yourself Deku, and I didn't know how to tell you. I thought you would be mad at me for deceiving you." Danial finally stopped laughing and looked up into shining jade eyes. He instantly looked away, fear clear in his blue eyes that Jay would change his mind and want nothing to do with him. That's when Danial felt a warm hand slide up and down his side, while Jay's other handheld onto his wrist. Danial looked at the hands surprised before looking up at Jay's freckled, strong face.

"Nothing you could do could make me get mad at you or change my mind about how I feel about you," Jay said bringing his right hand up to cup Danial's face. His jade eyes filled with love and adoration for the beautiful blonde in front of him. They were standing at most one foot apart.

"Are you going to kiss me or just keep teasing me, Deku," Danial asked lightly, glaring at the shocked man in front of him. A cocky smirk rising onto his face. Jay's face was bright red as his jade eyes nearly popped out of their sockets, looking like a deer in the highlights. It took everything in Danial not to burst out laughing.

With his right hand still cupping Danial's cheek, he brings his other hand to grip onto his waist. Bringing Danial flush against him and bringing his face down to the blonde perfect pink lips. Just before their lips met, jade looked into storm making sure that this was okay. Danial, in reply, pushed his lips flush against Jay's.

A/N

You're gonna go far, kid by the offspring

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