Painful Memories
[Pandora’s POV]
“Please, help me.”
The words leave my lips as I fade in and out of consciousness, my body burning, my core throbbing, and every fiber of my being screaming for relief. It hurts; it’s scary, and I don’t know what is happening to my body, which has been left in the hands of that man who pretended like he knew me.
Was I still in that room in the auction house being used and raped? Did he already take me away? I couldn’t focus enough to know, and it killed me to know this.
Snap out of it, Pandora. I beg inwardly, sucking my bottom lip between my teeth and biting down as hard as I could to try to bring myself back to sanity. You’ve got to snap out of it.
But I can’t. Whatever the madam had me injected with is much too potent for that. It leaves me trapped and at the mercy of whoever is around me until something cool and delicious slides down my throat. As it moves, it cools the places of my body that are burning, easing the ache in my groin and finally calming me. But instead of being able to actually focus on the world around me, I find that I’m fading, too exhausted from what has happened to actually confirm or deny my suspicions, and before I know it, I’m falling into an exhausted sleep.
However, it doesn’t last long before I’m being shaken awake, brought back to a familiar scene that replays itself in my head again and again. And as I go through the motions of moving, all the memories of that time, all the feelings, all the scents, everything crashes into me, threatening to suffocate me until the moment that I lost everything comes into play and I once again find myself staring at my mother’s unmoving body.
“Say goodbye,” the one holding and hurting me laughs before carrying me down the stairs to the first floor, where all the guards, maids, and servants that I grew up with, who took such great care of me, lie motionless, drenched in their own blood. And lying in the middle of them is my father.
His head is twisted to a dangerous angle, and his soulless eyes stare straight ahead, burning into me as I keep mine locked on his, but the warmth and love that I always saw there when he looked at me are gone, and all that is left is cold accusation.
“Your fault.” His ghostly voice chants as the dead servants around him sit up.
“Your fault.”
“Your fault.”
“Your fault.”
They chant again and again, their hollow voices mixing and combining, forming into a single voice that is so loud it echoes in my head.
My fault. Yes, all of this was my fault, as I would later learn that this attack took place because my father refused to marry me off to the alpha of Onyx Moon, and because of that refusal, Onyx Moon demanded the decimation of my pack and to have me sold to the auctions where I was meant to live out the rest of my miserable life.
Why? I think inwardly, letting their voices remind me of the sin that I have committed. Why didn’t you just say yes?
As this single thought hits me, I feel something warm touch my head, startling me and calming the torrent of emotions that rush through me. It slowly pulls me, making the world that I’m trapped in sway until I’m left drifting into comfortable darkness until my eyes slowly open and I find myself staring up into a handsome face that is twisted into a look of distress.
“Who?” I whisper as his warm hand remains pressed against my forehead, sending waves of comforting warmth surging through me from where he touches. “Who are…”
“You’re awake,” he sighs, ignoring my question completely. “Thank goodness.”
Awake. Right, I was sleeping, but where was this? The atmosphere was completely different from that of the auctions, as was the scent that gently wrapped itself around me. Instead of the stink of shit and piss, the scent of soap and something spicy was attacking all my senses.
“How do you feel?” The man asks, drawing my attention back to him. “Are you uncomfortable anywhere?”
Frowning, I try to make sense of the concern that he is showing until I remember what happened before this, and as all these memories come crashing back, only one thought remains.
“What did you do to me?” I yell, sitting up and wrapping my arms around myself in an attempt to hide from the one who did this. “Did you… did you do what…?”
“Hey,” he gasps, his ice-blue eyes widening. “What the hell are you accusing me of?”
“You did, right?” I growl, knowing there was no way that he didn’t take advantage of my forced rut since he must be the one who the madam said was buying me. “You heartless bastard!”
Fear and panic mix and mingle in me, keeping me on high alert and making me try to make myself as small as possible as I try not to imagine all the things this man must have done while I was unable to stop him.
“Was it fun for you?” I push, though the small voice in the back of my head screams to be reasonable. “Taking advantage of someone who was in such distress? You’re just like all the rest. Why try to act like you’re a good person now?”
“Wait,” the man growls, his voice dangerous. “I think before you start jumping to conclusions, you should give me a chance to speak.”
“Why?” I snap, not wanting to hear a damn thing he had to say. “Are you going to try to claim that you did nothing? Do you expect me to believe that when you visited a place like that and even paid to get me out?”
“That,” he begins, agreement flashing in his eyes. “I suppose that you’re correct; I do look like the others, but…”
“But what?” I demand. “Are you going to say that you’re different?”
“If you just take a moment to take note of your own body, I think that you will realize that I am.” He sighs. “Instead of freaking out the minute you wake up, you should be smart and take count of your situation and surroundings. Only then will you be able to come up with a logical decision as to what your next move is, and then we can actually get down to business.”
“Business.” I repeat. “And what business could we possibly have?”
“I have a proposition for you.” He smirks, clearly satisfied that I was even giving him a chance to speak. “It’s quite simple really. All you have to do is agree to stay by my side as my fiancé for a set amount of time. And after that,” he continues, giving me a determined glance. “I’ll set you free to do whatever it is that you want.”