Three

It's only noon and I have one more meeting scheduled at 2:00 This meeting is an informal sit down with a John Hutchinson with Hutchinson and Associates Law Firm. I hate having to sit through these meetings. Especially today. Last night was horrible. After a year of back and forth, my boyfriend David, well... ex boyfriend as of last night, decided to end our relationship. Neither of us were really happy with the way things were going, but my pride is hurt. I wish I were a stronger person and dumped him before he dumped me.

David and I didn't exactly mesh. The only thing that kept us together was that we both loved to get high. We would spend many nights blasted out of our minds from

Cocaine and xanax. I have tried twice to stop using during our year long relationship, but I couldn't. The company, my father's threats, and my childhood have left me scarred for life.

David and I decided 3 months ago to quit using. We both come from prestigeous families, and the thought of someone finding out our secret and exposing us was becoming too much of a load to bear.

Turns out he has met someone else and he is in love with her. I had my suspicions but to be honest... while he stopped using, I continued my self destructive path, and he thought that I would bring him down.

So what did I do last night? Called our old dealer and spent my evening snorting cocaine in my bedroom. Too zooted to sleep, I fell back into my hahit of taking xanax to make myself numb enough to sleep.

On top of feeling sick to my stomach, I feel disgusted with myself. I've failed. How I have managed to function at work and around executives.... I don't know. Perhaps because my whole life has been spent keeping up apperances. I'm used to lying.

If my secret comes out... then I am fucked. I will lose everything I have worked so hard to achieve. David is trustworthy and has a lot to lose should he tell anyone... so for now, my secret is safe.

The fact that I base my business on 100 percent honesty and transparency is a contradiction of how I live my life. It makes me feel more sick of myself for lying. I try to justify my actions as not lying. It isn't lying... I'm just not telling anyone that I am a junkie. They don't know so there is no lie... except for Gretchen... I feel shitty for lying to her.

I just want this meeting to end... today is a half day for me. My team will be attending a workshop with a sales rep to go over a demonstration on some new editing software. I received my training several weeks ago and am up to speed, so there is no reason for me to attend.

I am fidgity and sleep deprived. My bed and a xanax sounds like heaven right about now.

There is a soft knock on my door and my assistant Gretchen enters my office with a smile on her face the size of Texas. "Alicia the 2:00 appointment just arrived and wait til you see the eye candy he is! Just thought I'd give you a heads up before I bring him in".

Gretchen is one in a million. She's much older than me and was my first friend when I moved to the city. Well... she kinda is my only friend to be honest. I've come to view her as the mother I never had. She knows about my father's abuse, and she knows about my previous attempts of trying to get sober. She is an invaluable member of the team and 6 months ago came on board, with a lot of arm twisting on my part, to become my assistant. This woman has seen me at my lowest and she opened her home to me when I hit rock bottom. I've become so emotionally dependant and attached to Gretchen... I feel like a piece of shit though. She thinks I've been clean for several months. She does not know that I have started using again. I can't bring myself to burden her with this. It would put her into the horrible position of choosing what is morally right as far as the company, and against her wanting to protect and shield me for personal reasons. I can't bring her down with me. And yeah... I am ashamed of myself.

"Are you okay? she asks with a slight twitch of her brow."

"Me? Yeah. I'm okay as I can be. David broke up with me last night... I should be happy! but my ego is taking quite a beating".

She hurries to my chairside and places her hands on my shoulder. With gentle green eyes and a small smile she grabs me into the comfort of her motherly arms.

"I'm so sorry Alicia. What can I do? Hm"?

"Nothing Gretchen. It's for the best".

"Absolutely... doesn't mean it won't hurt. but honey you were much too good for him".

He says he's been seeing someone else and he is in love with her. Oh well. What can I do? Like you said it was for the best". I twist my hair into a messy top knot and bury my face in my hands in defeat.

"Hey why don't you stop by tonight? This sounds like a cookies and tea kinda night".

"You're too kind to me, Gretchen, but I think tonight is gonna be a read a book and go to bed early kinda night for me. I didn't sleep well last night", I sigh.

"Well if you should change your mind.... you know you are always welcome". She gives me a gentle yet sincere smile and her kindness makes my eyes water.

"I appreciate that Gretchen. Thank you! I just have this meeting to get through then I'm calling it an early day. I'm ready... bring him in. I will need you present to take notes".

"Aye aye captain".

I take a quick swig from my glass of water and a quick peek at myself in my compact mirror to make sure i am in decent shape for this. I look a little tired but I don't look hungover.

"Right this way sir! Ms. Johnson... your 2:00. Mr.... oh I'm sorry! I totally blanked on your name". Gretchen stammers and then blushes.

A tall dark haired man follows Gretchen into my office and his dark eyes perk up as he stares at me standing in front of my desk.

"Ms. Johnson? I'm Jonathan Hutchinson from Hutchinson and Associates. It's a pleasure to finally meet you". He extends his hand for a handshake and I won't lie... I am quite taken aback by the man standing before me. I was expecting a much older man. Jonathan looks to be about my age, perhaps a tad bit older. He is dressed in a navy blue button down shirt and gray slacks. His eyes are very dark and his hair is cut short, but a bit longer and tossled on top. Like he spent his day running his hands through his hair every so often. He gives me a polite smile and his handshake is strong, yet there is a softness.

"Hello Mr. Hutchinson, pleasure is all mine. I've heard great things about you and your firm. Please have a seat".

I go to sit behind my desk and he sits in one of the leather seats opposite me. Gretchen is sitting in the seat next to him and looks like she is in heaven.

"Before we get started can I offer you some water? Soda? Scotch"?

"No thank you Ms.Johnson". He holds my gaze and gives me a smile. His eyes never leaving mine.

"Please call me Alicia. This is my assistant, Gretchen. She will be taking notes during our meeting".

He gives Gretchen a soft smile and seems so at ease sitting across from me. I am trying my best to not gaze at him as I know Gretchen will make some sort of expression that would send me into a fit of laughter. She was right. Mr. Hutchinson is quite a handsome man. He carries himself with a confidence that doesn't come off as condenscending. I can't seem to stop staring at him and I feel myself begin to blush.

"Mr. Hutchinson as you know"...-

"Please, Alicia, Gretchen, I would prefer you call me Jonathan. Mr. Hutchinson reminds me of my old man he laughs. And besides.... we are going to be working quite closely these next few months, I'm more laid back than my father and I'm thinking you yourself are also more laid back".

I shoot him a surprised look.

Of course! The Mr. Hutchinson i was expecting to see today was his father! Although I am not a bit disapointed that his son is here instead.

"My father.... has quite a case load and thought it was best if I handled this meeting about the advertising campaign. especially since I minored in business. I can assure you that you're in capable hands", he laughs.

" I also know my father is gonna be heading the legal stuff with your company. You want to expand and branch into the European market"?

"Absolutely! The idea has been on my mind for about a year and due to how well AnJ has performed the past 3 quarters.... I figured the timing was right". He nods his head and his eyes flash with surprise. "He's the right guy to help you and he is very excited about this", he nods.

"I'm delighted that he is excited, and I feel better knowing that I am in such capable hands". Fuck! That did not come off as profesional at all. I pull my hair loose from the top knot and let it fall freely across my shoulders. I notice him blush. "I've come up with two story boards", I continue. "The first"...I reach across the desk to hand him the cardboard. "Your father mentioned that Hutchinson and Associates was founded by your grandfather. So, my first vision is actually for a television commercial. We start with your grandfather as a young boy who decides to make a difference in the world. We follow his journey from childhood, to adulthood... chronicaling important events in his life... kindergarten graduation, high school graduation, college graduation, starting law school... graduating, and getting his first job in a legal office... to him starting his firm". Jonathan leans forward to study the storyboards and I nervously tuck a strand of hair behind my ear.

"We then show snippets of him starting a family... getting married... the birth of your father... so on and so on... to the future of your father being where he is now... I think voice overs are a little over rated, but in this case, your father will be narrating the story". He raises an eyebrow and nods his head in approval and then stares at me intently. "We then end with your father in his office explaining the importance of a family law firm, and how Hutchinson and Associates takes pride in that, and makes them the best". I let out a deep breath and smile nervously.

"I like that idea he says quietly. He leans over the desk to study the story board, and my knees are on the verge of buckling. Im so thankful that I am seated behind a desk. His cologne... smells so good. Not overpowering, but very subtle... Cedarwood, with a hit of fresh linens.

"The 2nd story board is basically for a magazine advertisement", I continue. "Your father and his family, with just a paragraph or so with with how the company started, where it's going, and how Hutchinsons And Associates is a family run law firm and takes pride on treating every client like family".

Wow... I'm really impressed with both options. You've really done your homework iIsee. I will definitely run this by my father, but, Ms. Johnson, I must say it's gonna be hard to choose between the two. What's the next step"?

"Well if your father chooses the commercial, we would need to write the script. Hire actors to portray the characters... scout locations... purchase air time...

If we go with option number 2... its just the matter of getting a photographer to take some photos at your father's place of choosing... and we handle the magazines, purchase space to run the ad... etc.

"I am sure he would probably go with both options... but of course he has the final say".

"Please take the story boards with you and here is a copy of the outlines". I pack everything nearly in a folder and slide it across my desk. He reaches for the file and I notice that there is no wedding ring on his finger.

What is wrong with me?

He goes to stand up and I must say I am giddy that this meeting went rather well. And quickly! I will be home before I know it and I can put this awful day behind me.

"Gretchen"? he shakes her hand. "Nice meeting you". She blushes three shades of red and gives Jonathan a quick nod. I begin to rise to shake his hand. "Ms. Johnson.... Alicia. I will be giving you a call later this evening with our decision".

He shakes my hand, but his eyes linger on our joined hands for perhaps a bit longer than necessary. He looks into my eyes and his are a mixture of hazel and flecks of a darker brown. He seems to want to say something, but he quickly changes his mind and ends our handshake.

He gathers his briefcase and then strolls out of the door. "Well... I should be going. I have another meeting downtown that I am probably late for".

"Oh. I hope I won't make you late to your appointment"?

"No worries. I'm not looking forward to it anyways", he says with a bit of irritation in his voice. "I will be in touch".

Shaking my head, I slink back into my seat and Gretchen gives me sly smirk... she lifts her eyebrow. "Girl... see... I told you! and his cologne"...

I break out into laughter at her silliness. Gretchen is adorable, and her laughter is infectious. This brief moment has been by far the highlight or a rather messy day. I take a sip of water and swing my chair around to take a look at the boats gliding in the river below. The click of the door after her exit snaps me back to reality. The man was handsome she was correct. I've seen my share of handsome men enter my office in the years I have been at the helm. But none of them have ever left me with the feeling of the tiny electric spark that caroused through me during that handshake... and that still carouses throughout my entire body a half hour after his departure.

I find myself rather curious about his other meeting downtown. He said he didn't want to be there