Chapter Five

Lena's POV

Immediately the devil stepped out of the room I broke into loud tears, I wailed and wept like a bereaved and found no consolation. Every nerve and fibre in me ached, I found no meaning to live anymore and desperately wished that I was dead.

The pain in my heart surpassed the one at my lower abdomen. At twenty-three I am or was still a virgin but not anymore. When I kept myself pure, I never for once imagined it would snatched from my by a monster in the cruelest way ever.

Robbed of my dignity and treasure, I was referred to as a slut and accused of faking it then left to deal with the aftermath. I swore, cursed but nothing happened so I picked myself up, weakly and found my way into the bathroom. I ran a hot bath and laid in the jacuzzi, attempting to drown myself which was futile.

The entire scene replayed in my head like a stuck endless loop.

The desecration, my pleas and unsuccessful protests. I disgust myself, still feeling his touch on my skin and his raspy breath on my neck.

I washed off the blood from my body, still feeling sore and scrubbed my skin until it bleed, trying to get off his touch from me. I ended up spending hours crying, screaming and scrubbing until there was no ounce of strength left in me. Reluctantly and mindlessly, I dried myself with a towel and returned to the room to find a tray of food on the bedside table and a drawer with it's doors flung open.

It contained several dresses so I settled for a short floral black dress which matches my life, mourning my despised past, hellish present and unclear future. I crouched in a corner, sobbing until I fell asleep.

"What the hell do you think you're doing?" A thunderous voice echoed.

I gasped and my eyes fluttered open but no one was there, my heartbeat had increased and I realized I was hallucinating but it didn't get better. I starved the entire day and at night, he came back and did worse to me than the previous day and the circle continued, only that I began to eat and got more scared of the littlest thing.

I was slowly losing my mind and the days that followed was more hellish than ever, I became accustomed to the pain.

There was no essence to life anymore. As long as I kept living as Luna, I would suffer for her sins and there was no way I'd reveal this to anyone, my family's life would be ruined if Richard knows but I was tired of having to live like a vixen been punished for her past sins.

No one cares about me, not even my parents so I took a very important decision, it was time to end it all. A scar was written on me forever with an indelible scar. I couldn't sleep for the fear of my own traumatizing monster.

It kept resonating in my ears that I am just a piece of trash, no one loves me anyway, I could cease to exist and the world would not be different, therapy won't be happy to heal it either.

I lost what it feels like to be human, to live and now I simply existed. I wanted to be free from the confines of the world, to seek peace and solace.

When I left the house, nobody noticed. The maids didn't say a word to me neither did anyone pay attention so I walked out of the gates into the streets lost in my own thoughts. Hours later, I tried calling my parents and Mom picked up.

"Mom?" I cried. "I'm tired, I can't do this anymore, please help me." I begged, desperately.

"What the hell are you talking about? You're married now and it should stay so! Don't you ever utter this nonsense ever again!" She barked.

"I want to leave, he's a monster, please help me." I begged her.

"I don't care but the only way you're leaving is in a body bag, do you understand?" She retorted and hung up. Tears rolled down my face and there was no one else that I would call.

The pain was excruciatingly overwhelming so I stared at the overhead bridge I found myself, viewing the world below; the flow of traffic.

I dialed the number of the person who made my life a living hell and he picked at the first ring.

"Unless you're begging for a beating you know you should never call me." He threatened.

I sniffed back my tears.

"Would you please help me? I can't breathe, the pain is consuming me?" I desperately said to him.

"I don't want to die but I don't want to live like this-"

He interrupted.

"I don't care what you do, throw yourself down a bridge, incoming vehicle or something, stop calling me else I'll kill you myself!" He interjected.

"But.." I began to say but I heard a feminine voice over the phone, asking him who he was speaking with. He replied saying it was nobody and he hung up on me.

With teary eyes, I did as he said, I climbed on a ledge and looked down at the ocean below, it looked peacefully, wooing me into it's embrace and I want to accept the invitation.

"Luna?" I heard a familiar voice call out.

I turned back to see Tyler standing few meters away from me, he ran over and looked horrified, he was panicking.

"What are you doing Luna? It's dangerous!" He scolded me.

" Leave me alone!" I yelled at him.

"I was just passing by and thought I saw-, you know what? Forget that, what the hell do you think you're doing?" He chastised.

"I'm tired, fed up, exhausted and every other adjective that suits the phrase! do you know that all my life I've lived through hell with the hope that someday I'll escape to my own little paradise but it's all a lie, nobody can save me. My life is a mess and I'm tired of living it!' I confessed, crying.

He tried pacifying me, gesticulating with his hands but I shook my head.

"I understand, how about you come down here and tell me all about it, I'll listen, I promise!" He promised.

I shook my head. "No, you're Richard's friends, you probably sees me the same way he does; worthless and humiliating, no one cares about me!." I muttered.

"No! Richard cares, he may seem wicked and distant but I swear to you that he's not who you think he is, he's just scared of opening up to you, come down and I'll tell you everything."

I shook my head, seeing through his lies. "No he doesn't."

He brought out his phone and dialed a number.

"Richard, can you please tell Luna that she isn't worthless and you're being harsh on her for a reason?" He requested, putting the phone on speaker and my heart desperately wanted him to say the words.

Richard scoffed. "Did you hit your head Tyler? What the hell-"

"I'm with her and she's standing on a ledge right now, just do as I say please?" Tyler cut him off, panicking.

He snickered. "Luna, if that's the word you need to hear from me and you're truly standing on a ledge then you'd better jump." He said, emotionlessly.

"No, no! You're..."

"See? I'm just a waste of space." I said to Tyler. "Thank you, you're the only person who's ever been nice to me." I said to him, I smiled weakly and threw myself off the ledge while he screamed, wanting to reach to me but he was too late and I closed my eyes, embracing the darkness that called on to me. Peace, I found peace.